A squirrel chatters loudly as it jumps across the lace-like tree branches that surround my 140-year-old octagon-shaped porch overlooking the lake. It’s my favorite place — where I have morning coffee, where I read in the evenings, and where I sit to relax during those rare times when I have downtime. When guests come, it’s where most of our chatting takes place, and it’s where I practice my guitar. Sometimes I just sit and stare at the lake and listen to the loons.

Unlike June, our first month here at the lake, when things were silent and it was rare to see a boat or a neighbor, the July 4th holiday stimulated most surrounding camps to fill every cabin with guests. It got busy with boats and parties, and now it’s deadly quiet again. But most will be back in another week for the rest of the summer.

Some summers at the Rhoads camp are packed with visiting friends, but so far we’ve had no guests. But we’ve had the gift of having all three kids home together, a rarity these days with their busy lives. I told them I’m happiest when we are all together. 

Another Lake Another Time

Growing up, life seemed normal when my parents and brothers and I were all together at our lake home on Lake Wawasee in Indiana. We boated, sailed, did water skiing and canoeing together, cooked out, and played games at night. We managed to carry that summer tradition through high school and college ages. And we were shocked when we thought it was all coming to an end, when Dad sold the place to move off the lake after being there for three generations. 

None of us were terribly excited about the new place in the Adirondacks, not because it wasn’t beautiful, but because our tradition, our secure feeling, was uprooted. Our comfort zone had been disrupted. But dad was ultimately right. Living on Golden Pond was better. We fought it for a while, but eventually fell in love with the new place’s stunning beauty, lush woods, and rich history. And we continued those same family traditions here and built new, better traditions, like breakfast in the tiny Trapper Cabin and dessert and ghost stories in the Teepee.

The Power of Disruption

It takes a special vision to disrupt family tradition, to abandon a place where our grandparents and great-grandparents had lived. But it had changed, and instead of a quiet, tree-lined lake, it had become packed with houses squeezed in together and thousands of loud, exhaust-spewing ski boats and jet skis. A teenager’s dream, but not a very peaceful place for civilized adults. 

I wonder if I could have done what my dad did, making a disruptive change for the better against the wishes of my family. Or would I succumb to the pressure to keep things the way they are, just because it’s always been done that way?

What about you?

Family is one thing, business is another. Recently I’ve experienced some planned disruption in my business. I felt the need to make a change and replace a perfectly lovely person, and friend. There was nothing wrong with this person, who was perfectly competent, but change was needed to take things to the next level, and there was no place to put this person. It was one of the hardest things I ever had to do, but it was the right thing to do if I was to prepare for the next level of growth. In reality, I resisted it; I did not want to let go and make the change, because comfort is easier than disruption.

Disruption is painful. It’s uncomfortable. Having to ask good people to move on is the worst. Yet if you don’t do it, you eventually risk suffering the effects of no change, which can put more jobs at risk.

Is there a place in your life or work where your gut is telling you to make a change, but you’re resisting? 

Pain Is Gain

Every high achiever I’ve ever studied has said exactly the same thing: You don’t grow if you don’t face pain. Making changes in your life, your work life, your relationships is painful. Not making them tends to result in becoming like a stale pond of still water … stagnant and gathering algae. Yet when you put a fountain in the middle of a pond, to agitate the water and keep things alive and moving, the pond recovers from being stale. The same is true for life.

Are you due to be agitated? Have you become stale?

Apple founder Steve Jobs, who was known for disruption, famously said, “Innovation is the ability to see change as an opportunity, not a threat.” His perspective embraces disruption rather than fearing it. Even Helen Keller highlighted the power of adversity: “Although the world is full of suffering, it is also full of the overcoming of it.” Facing pain head-on can lead to resilience and strength. As 1888 presidential candidate Frederick Douglass said, “If there is no struggle, there is no progress.” 

Recently a Navy SEAL talked in a TikTok video about how all the good things that happened in his life occurred because of his willingness to endure pain. The more pain you suffer, the better things get.

’I Should Have Done It Sooner’

I often hear those words from someone who delayed making a change for years, only to look back and realize it was not as painful as they had feared, and that things were better. Someone else I know told me they had clung to a job they hated, eventually got fired, and told me it was the kick in the butt they needed. Life is better as a result. It might be a job, a relationship, or a work-related decision.

Using Milestones

We are officially at the halfway point of 2024. It went by so fast — it feels like it was just New Year’s. I like to look at milestones like this as a chance to start thinking about what I want to change next year, then using the next six months to make a plan and lay the track. If I don’t, life gets away and growth never happens. Birthdays are a great time to ask yourself if you’re happy, or if you need to make changes or need to push yourself out of your comfort zone.

If something about that is ringing true, ask yourself, “What should I do about it, and why do I fear it?” What’s the worst that can happen? It’s probably not as bad as you think it is.

Be bold. Be strong. Make a decision and move forward so you don’t become a stagnant pond.

Eric Rhoads

PS: A friend of mine says, “If I lose sleep over something more than three nights, I need to make a change.” Usually it’s about someone causing you grief that needs to move out of your life. Sometimes, though, we tolerate it because they are people we cannot completely disconnect from … like family. What are you losing sleep over?

I used to lose sleep over learning to paint. I wanted to do art, but I feared that I would fail, so I did nothing. I knew I did not have natural talent and couldn’t even draw a stick figure well. My attempts reinforced my beliefs, and once a teacher even told me, “You really aren’t cut out for this.” I was devastated but not surprised.

Years later, I accidentally came across info about an instructor who sounded different, so I sought him out, and he discovered things inside of me I didn’t know existed. A great teacher can make the difference.

I’ve devoted the last two decades to teaching people how to paint, and the result is that massive numbers of people have discovered their inner gifts, once someone like us showed them how to bring them out.

I now paint in most mediums (oil, watercolor, acrylic, gouache, pastel), and knowing what I know now, if I had to start over, I’d start with pastel. Why? Because my earlier start was confused by formulas and mixtures to make color and make it flow. I was intimidated by oils, smells, chemicals. But with pastel, you already know how to use it … it’s like a sophisticated crayon, with brilliant color. You don’t have to learn to mix chemicals or mix colors, you just learn by putting one color over another. And in most cases, you just choose the color you want. 

My annual Pastel Live online event has taught thousands to paint over each of the last few years. If you immerse yourself for 3 days (and 4 if you choose our optional Essentials Day for beginners or as a refresher), you can’t help but walk away knowing how to paint and feeling like you made huge progress. Then as you practice, knowing the principles learned from the 30 or so top masters teaching, you skip a lot of years of trying to figure it out on your own.

The event is coming September 18-20. If you cannot attend live, just know that you get replays with each signup that you can watch on your own schedule. Though the experience is best when you’re with us live.

Visit PastelLive.com

Sprinkles hit the ceiling of the old great room of the home built in 1850, as rain is tapping on the tin roof above my head. I sit here in silence as my eyes gaze around the room in awe of the craftsmanship of intertwined decorative slats, a massive stone fireplace, and a carved star mounted to the ceiling to designate where to find the North Star. 

Rich History

Worn red antique rugs cover the wooden floors. Kerosene lanterns are mounted to the walls, never removed when newfangled electricity was added. An old fringe-shaded Victorian lamp stands at attention in the corner by the diamond-paned windows, surrounded by furniture made from twigs, an antique chessboard, a stuffed hawk, and a scale model of a classic wooden boat. 

This old lake home and its contents have not changed much since the place was built, other than plumbing and electricity added. The long dining room that could seat 20 was once alive with the conversations of the six families who have lived here in the past 170 years and their guests, and it’s my desire to have multiple generations of my family carry on the tradition. 

In Search of the ‘Golden Pond’ Life

When my dad first discovered this lake after a search to find a place like the movie On Golden Pond, his goal was to keep his family here for generations, as many of the families on this lake have done. There is peace and rejuvenation and solace in the lake’s beauty, and in the sense of tradition. 

For me this place is more important than any on earth I’ve discovered so far. The air and water are pure and cleansing to the body and the mind. Three months here, even though I’m working, provides the battery recharge to be able to mentally take on any challenge in the coming year, especially in an election year with the fallout from whatever happens.

Let’s NOT Talk Politics

In case you haven’t noticed, I avoid politics like a root canal. I don’t like to talk about it, watch it, or be a part of it. If you’re thinking I’m about to make a statement about last week’s debates, the current situation, who I loathe or who I support, you’ll never hear that from me.

I don’t like politicians, but I’m grateful there are people willing to subject themselves to life under a microscope in service of their country. As I’ve stated before, I was offered a chance to run for U.S. Senate and turned it down because I can’t imagine a more horrible life.

Change Your Mind

Here’s the thing … no one can ever change your mind. Only you can change your mind, and that rarely comes from someone trying to convince you. Change comes only when you use your own brain, have an “aha moment,” and are willing to challenge your own possibly lifelong assumptions because you took the time to keep your mind open and to study for yourself. 

Me trying to use my platform to get you to vote for someone would be foolish. I need every reader or customer I have. Why would I irritate half of them by revealing my political stance? I guess I’m just not rich or famous enough to not care. 

Politicians Make Me Giggle

It makes me giggle when politicians try to pretend to be ordinary people who can relate to us. You know, “I used to work the coal mines before walking 10 miles to school in a blizzard, and then I’d work 15-hour days on weekends to earn money to support my mother and my 18 brothers and sisters.” I’m sure some really did have modest starts in life. But once they became elected officials at a high enough level, they became part of an elite class with privileges none of us can imagine. I’m sad to say that I tend to think most of those life stories are made up, designed to get us to relate to them. It doesn’t work. 

Welcome to Political Season

So as we enter this political season, when the media ramps up the rhetoric and tells you why one candidate is like Hitler and the other is perfect — all designed to get ratings up and keep you watching intently — I want to offer some advice. Oh, it’s not voting advice. I’ll continue to love you no matter how you vote. 

1. 1. Use your brain. Don’t trust anything anyone tells you. Find out for yourself.
   2. Avoid extremes. If people are making crazy statements about a candidate, ask why.
   3. Study the opposite point of view. I get fresh content from X (formerly Twitter) and can read up on the other side of the story. Don’t assume you know. There are smart people for and against any candidate. Find out why. Read their opinions. Don’t just go with the party line.
   4. Avoid “9 out of 10 say this” arguments. Just because someone is a scholar or an expert does not make them right. Nine out of 10 Harvard professors don’t have to worry about how to pay your rent.
   5. Don’t let them tug at your heartstrings. Politicians love to use children as pawns. You know, “kids in cages,” that kind of thing. Do you think anyone running our government would actually let that happen? 
   6. Ask yourself: What do they have to lose? Why are they trying so hard? Is it really about the future of the country? Or the future of their own power and position?
   7. Don’t get emotional. We’re easily controlled when we’re emotional. 
   8. Follow the money. Almost always, money is the motivation behind everything.
   9. Avoid peer pressure. Vote your heart. Don’t pick a candidate because your friends think they are cool. 

A Leader at the United Nations

I once met a very wise and powerful woman who knew every world leader of her time, including every living past president or national leader, because of her work in the UN. After a visit by the president of a major country, she was asked this one question: “Would you trust this man with your grandchildren’s lives?” Her answer: “Not for a moment.”  

Who would you trust with your family? Is your quick answer based on something someone else told you? Or something you learned on your own?

The Goal of the Media

I grew up working in the media. Most of the people I worked with would do anything for an extra rating point. I mean anything, even something illegal if they knew they wouldn’t get caught. The media’s sole job is to make you watch more, build the ratings, and get you into an emotional state so you’ll keep coming back for more. Watching just 15 minutes of any news broadcast can put you into a hypnotic state and keep you there for hours. The same is true for social media. 

Wouldn’t it be nice if everything wasn’t about party lines? Wouldn’t it be refreshing if someone said, “The other side is right this time”? But that rarely happens anymore. Things are overly polarized. 

Remember Independence Day

I’m not referring to last Thursday, I’m referring to the true meaning of independence. Preservation of our country is critical. No candidate will be perfect. Both will make terrible mistakes. No matter who wins, the media will love them and hate them at times, and they’ll tell you who to love and who to hate. Don’t let them do it. Use your brain.

Don’t Be a Pawn

I can’t watch or listen to anything right-wing or left-wing. I distrust most of what they tell me because they have an agenda that goes beyond driving ratings.There is not a single balanced TV network. I pay attention to a few people who seem to be reasonable and balanced and who are not on TV or radio, then draw my own conclusions. These people are hard to find, and sometimes they lose my trust. Keep an open mind and pray about it.

My Embarrassing Voting Record

I’ll go into a voting booth and lay down my vote, something we should all do so our voice is heard. But there are usually some people on the ballot for local or state positions that I’ve never heard of. I feel bad about that, because too often my votes are based on whose signs stood out the most or if they are a part of my party. Do I know their policies? I’m embarrassed to say I rarely do. We owe our communities and states more than a mere glance and a shoot-from-the-hip vote. These people are determining our taxes and our school policies and our policies regarding the state and the freedom of our communities. And just belonging to a party is no longer a reason to vote for someone; we’re seeing people on both sides betray their own party — for the right reasons, or for the wrong ones.

Take the privilege of voting seriously, as though your life depended on it. But don’t allow yourself to be manipulated. You’re bigger than that.

Eric Rhoads

PS: I walked a thin line here because my intent is to stimulate thought, not try to make you guess my political stance or preference. I will never try to influence you. I just hope more people will stop allowing themselves to be influenced (if that’s even possible).

My heart at the moment is to spend the rest of today on the dock, hoping the rain leaves and the sun comes out, so I can play the rest of the long weekend. 

Speaking of play… 

Pastel Live, the world’s largest online pastel conference, is taking place in September. If you want to learn to paint, pastel is the easiest medium. You don’t have to learn to mix color — like crayons, you lay down colors and get incredible, vibrant results. You can learn more at pastellive.com.

Realism Live is coming in November and Watercolor Live in January, and our new Acrylic Live in March. You can sign up for any of them now.