My eyes opened this morning to a new scene — at least, new since June. Twisted oaks, high grasses, all being baked in the hot Texas sun, unlike the most squishy moss-covered grass in the Adirondacks. My tender toes burn as I hit the deck outside and hop rapidly to my old brown wicker couch. A bead of sweat hits my forehead and rolls down my nose like a rogue rollercoaster. I’m simply not used to summer in Texas. The cool Adirondacks have spoiled me.
I came here to host my Pastel Live conference, which ended last night, and today, as soon as we can get on the road, I’ll drive my daughter to her second year of college and the first “in-person” year she will have. Laurie and I thought we were empty-nesters last fall when school began, but alas, Zoom classes are easier from home than from a 10” x 10” cinder block dorm room, and the food is better. I’ll return to the Adirondacks for summer and fall tomorrow and we’ll try this empty nest thing one more time.
Tragedy
Between segments at my event, I’ve been glued to my screens, watching in horror as we all see a helpless situation we cannot control. I’m so used to being able to control things or help in some way, yet I’ve been racking my brain with no solutions.
But I ask myself, what if I were there? What if I were in that situation? What would I do?
How would I protect my family?
How would I escape?
I also ask myself, could that happen here?
What Would You Do?
Growing up Rhoads, my dad would always ask us questions like that. What would you do? He trained us for contingencies and always told us the unexpected often happens, and things you don’t think can happen, do happen.
Do or Die
I can remember talking to my father-in-law, who was a German soldier in WWII, who told me that the atrocities that happened surprised them all because, as he said, things like that don’t happen here. Suddenly he found himself forced to be in an army that supported things he did not support, things he did not want to be a part of. And he watched men in his line who were insubordinate be shot on the spot. He could not believe his eyes.
Those living in the Land of the Free have not seen a war on our soil since the Civil War. We’ve been blessed. But just because it has never occurred will not prevent it from happening. Which is why I have to ask my preparation questions. What would I do if..?
Though I usually preach positive thinking, some will say my contingency thinking is negative. Perhaps, but it’s better to have some ideas, some plans as a backup.
Watching the news, we’re seeing disaster because they underestimated the situation and did not have enough contingency plans.
What about you?
Contingencies relate to every part of your life. What would you do…
- If you lost your job?
- If the banks crashed and there was no access to your money, and ATMs did not work?
- If there were unexpected food shortages or stores were closed?
- If the power went out for a couple of months?
- If city water plants were shut down for a month?
- If there was no cell phone service for days, weeks, or months?
- If the Internet no longer existed?
- If GPS stopped working?
- If another country attacked our homeland?
- What if my house burned?
- What if someone broke in while we were sleeping?
- What if my house flooded?
As I ponder these things, I wonder if I could even drive somewhere to get away. I have not had a paper map in a decade, and I would not be able to access the addresses of my friends and family because my phone has died, Google doesn’t work, and online maps are no longer available.
My kids have probably never had a map in their hands.
Am I telling you this because I’m expecting something? Absolutely not. But history tells us that the unexpected happens and that sane people can become crazy fast.
Blown Away
And contingencies don’t have to be about the things mentioned; they can relate to anything in your life. Let me give you an example. One year, when I was living in Florida, I got stuck in the middle of a hurricane on the turnpike. It was a dangerous and scary situation. I thought I was going to die. So after I survived, I told myself, “Never again.” When future hurricanes were coming, I’d leave town two days before everyone else did. Sometimes they hit and I escaped, sometimes they missed and I had a nice weekend in a hotel somewhere. For those of you in New York and Boston and along the East Coast, there is a storm that might be headed your way. Are you ready? Have you thought about the contingencies?
I recall a storm that knocked power and water out for three weeks. You could survive with a contingency plan.
Last year during “Snownado” in Texas, we were snowed into an area that had no plows, no power, no water. In hindsight, we saw it coming on radar. We should have taken a vacation to Florida.
The last thing you want to do is have an unexpected disaster and to do what everyone else does. By thinking of every possible solution years in advance, you’ll know exactly what to do the second it happens while others are trying to figure out solutions.
As a parent, I feel an obligation to play out scenarios in my mind. I may never tell my kids about them, but in some cases I’ll be ready, have solutions, and be prepared. In other situations, I’ll be blindsided.
More Than One Solution
In any case, it’s worth a discussion. What are five things you could do if any of those situations actually happened? The worst thing you can do is say, “That will never happen,” because when you say it, BOOM, it will happen!
Cognitive Dissonance
Most will stare with their jaws dropped in disbelief, which is valuable time lost. There are stories of people who predicted the Holocaust and were mocked as crazy conspiracy theorists, but they escaped and survived. The rest had cognitive dissonance. They just refused to believe this would ever happen among people they trusted.
Rumors and Clues
My dad once told me of meeting a cab driver who had been a wealthy farmer in a country where they were hearing rumors that farms would be taken over. She urged her husband to take a family vacation, just in case. He told her she was nuts: “It won’t happen here.” They took out the cash they could, took a vacation to another country, and while they were gone all the farmers, including their friends, were killed. They had to survive on their vacation money until they could get jobs. They were the lucky ones who paid attention to the clues because, as my dad said, “There are always clues.” He once said, “Always consider that the opposite of what you’re being told will happen. What then?”
Am I trying to scare you? Of course not. But I care, and I want the best for you, and if you think things through, this little note could save your life someday. Of course, I hope it never comes to that, but being prepared is never a bad idea.
Eric Rhoads
PS: Speaking of being prepared, hundreds and hundreds of people are now prepared to do pastel painting because of our online Pastel Live conference, which we just completed. The next one is Realism Live, which will prepare you for all kinds of painting. Check it out.
My Fall Color Week artist retreat is going to happen in late September in the Adirondacks. It will be a week of fun, painting, and meeting new friends, no matter what level of painter you are. Come join us.
Also join us on our Fine Art Trip to Germany and Austria this fall, and my Russian Painting Trip in September. At the moment, it looks like both will happen.
I get so much from your coffee talks, Eric. This one was especially instructive and on point; I’d thought about some of them and have been pro-active in a few things, but your advice and experiences are so appreciated. It struck up a whole conversation with our friends/neighbors.
Thank you, Eric. There is always a good message in your Sunday Coffee.
“It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.”……as Charles Dicken’s famous novel starts (A Tale of Two Cities). Thank you, Eric for your insights and stories. They help.
Thanks. We all need to plan for the unexpected but usually don’t. How blessed we are to be in this country compared to some others. Yet we have the terrible losses from Covid, fires, and flooding in some areas.
Pastel Live was a wonderful event. I have been a pastelist for 20 years studying with many acclaimed artists for all around the country. I had never seen a demo of pan pastels. Those flowers were amazing. I had not seen a demo on large waves. I learned a great deal about colors that can produce the magic effect of sun through waves and while I used a toothbrush to speckle watercolor, I never thought to use alcohol and rub the toothbrush on a pastel stick to make the spray of water at the top of the wave. Those are just a few things I learned. I have Albert Handel’s video from you, but I could watch him forever. His demo for pastel live reinforced the joy he has with every pastel he does. He has the best self talk of anyone… He just marvels when one little mark of the right color makes his work sing. Thanks for pastel live , it was great. And thanks for talking with me on the last cocktail hour. All the best. Linda
Thank you for that insightful reminder. My husband and I go through scenarios like this all the time and know from experience how much a little forethought can save you from disaster. Last year my husband became disabled from a back injury and then Covid hit and lockdowns. Though both things through us for a time we have been able to survive because we had contingency plans. Some of our friends and family make fun of us, but we are more at peace knowing we can survive tough times. I always enjoy reading your Sunday Coffee posts! Many blessings to you!
Eric, I think about this often. In our nation, we are blessed to live removed from strife for so many decades. Food, drinking water, indoor plumbing (!) warmth and shelter are readily available. We have not seen a war fought on our soil in our lifetimes. As a woman, I have been able to
pursue my dreams and travel safely about the land, even solo. Rarely in human history has this been the case. We truly all benefit from “American privilege”. Yet there is no guarantee life will always be so civilized.
Great advise, always good to be ready. Have been preparing for some time.
So true Eric
As an 80 year old I cannot believe how society has changed here in Australia since Covid.
At times I am so ashamed that Australians have become so selfish.
I have really enjoyed your coffee break and now realise we are not the only country experiencing the same situation.
Thank you Eric
Eric,
You as usual have given me pause to think. And think I will.
I am still a little over whelmed with all I witnessed, experienced and internalized during Pastel Live. I did the beginners day as well and was glad I did! What a value.
Have to admit being a bit tired at the end of each day. I cannot imagine how exhausted you and the Streamline are feeling at this moment. I am grateful, thank you!
Blessings, Dianne
Eric,
Thanks for putting this advice out. I have forwarded this article to friends and family. In addition, having been in an earthquake, I would recommend keeping your vehicle gas tank filled.
Thanks, again.
Wow, that’s a lot. But you are so true. I’m 67 so old enough to remember all the way back to party lines, growing did in a garden, canning for winter, making clothes, fixing things when then broke instead of buying a new thing, sharing meals with neighbors – actually knowing your neighbors because there was community, reading a big atlas to get from A to B, taking food in your car because there might not be places to eat asking the way – or it is too expensive, wearing shoes till the sole had holes and only having 2 pairs – everyday and Sunday shoes, Rolodex, reading real books and then saving them to reread, playing outside for hours, family meals at the table and holding hands to pray then talking and sharing our day – conversation!
Sometimes when I consider the state of America now, I think should anything dire happen, it would be every man for himself and anarchy. We just aren’t connected anymore. Technology had been a blessing, but it’s also a curse. I think I’m going to find a rolodex on eBay and buy an Atlas. Thank God my art materials aren’t digital, so they will continue to take me away to my imaginative world. Thanks for all you have done and continue to do Erik. You amaze me. Wish I had half your energy and diligence. You are a blessing.
Your absolutely right Eric, things aren’t right in the world at the moment, I think there are a lot of us sensing this, I’ve made a few contingency plans, hopefully my fears will come to nothing, but doing nothing is to become a lamb.
Good advice. And if we prepare we’re in a better position to help others.
Eric, while I have enjoyed your columns for years, been moved to tears several times, I think this column is by far the most important column you have ever written. People can benefit so much by thinking through and then acting on what you write about, and finding solutions before the need arises in their personal situation. There are always some things that cannot be foreseen, however, there are many small steps that can be taken ahead of time to make most situations play out personally better than if no prior action and thought had been applied. I think a lot of us in the US have a tendency to ignore the signs or freak out; concrete action in timely manner can go so far to helping not only you but family, friends and neighbors. Bless you and your family, for warning people with your platform, may they pay attention asap and take action, being safe. And, BTW, I resonated deeply to a number of your columns, on do it now, time is never a given. Thank you!
Hi Eric, Thank you for these timely words of wisdom. I spoke to my husband yesterday about being prepared for the worst, while hoping for the best. I expect that you are aware that the Prime Minister of Canada has called a federal election. Week one has been nasty and I expect it will continue to heat up until the votes are in on September 20th. This no longer feels like our Canada. Please pray for us as we continue to pray for our American neighbours.
Your thoughts remind me of Hurricane Sandy that nobody dreamed that a disaster will happen, we were living in Brooklyn at that time by the ocean on Brighton beach, we were lucky that we were in Vienna, Austria by my in laws, it was really a blessing, because the flooding was a disaster
Thank you for this heart felt and honest review of “what if”. Your heed to awareness and caution is appreciated and a better part of wisdom. During the Texas blizzards, our friends who had just moved from lush NW Washington State had a scary time with his wife, two little ones, no power, water, food or heat – all systems sheathed in ice and unworkable. He took to visiting every neighbor he could get to, checking in, inviting over, praying with and for, taking what rations they had to share – just in case.
– Human behavior is unpredictable. So often we hear of the Mad who reign. But there are those who, in spite of the circumstances, stand in the gap. I would hope that in the face of fear, desperation and insanity, that I would be one of those.
Eric, thank you for bravely saying what many are thinking. My family and many friends are having these conversations often. You’re right, we need to have contingency plans. I hope we never need them but it could happen. See you soon at Fall Color Week!
Laura
Well said, at age 82 I remember WWII and how it impacted my family and neighbors. My kids laugh at the Atlas tucked in our car and a state map. They also laugh that I know what “weeds” are edible. I point them out. I hope they never need to remember.
No more trips around the world for a 101 yer old. So sorry!
In my late 30s, I finally got a real job after years of scraping by. As my situation improved I gave thought to how to survive a breakdown of society. I’ve always been a history buff, and one thing I took away from reading about survivors of many different tough situations, was that they had small valuables to trade for getting someone to hide them, or a guide to help them cross a border.
So I bought gold coins. It’s been 30 years and I haven’t needed them yet, but I feel better knowing I could grab them and go on a moment’s notice.
Jeff
Very good advise. I overthink sometimes and over plan and have been known to have a plan abcdefghi……… just in case. I rest better when I do that, then I can relax and focus on living . Then if something terrible happens I will take a deep breath , give thanks have faith and move on. I am 58, I have never experienced upheaval until the covid toilet paper and food shortage. I couldn’t believe the panic and empty shelves, very scary. Those are not alarmist questions though, they are for your safe survival. There are floods , tornados, fires and events we don’t want to think about. Its nice to know there are others out there with the same worries, its okay to be prepared. Noah was prepared. Lastly make sure to have at least pencils and paper to write and draw. Art is our safe place, artists need that to keep sane, or at the least balance our sanity. I pray for blessings to all , a calm happy heart and many pleasant days of painting.
Eric thank you for Pastel Live, it was so inspiring. I needed a push to get me back to painting, so I cleaned up my pastels and have a painting on my easel ready to finish. I signed up for next years Pastel Live. Perhaps Richard McKinley will be in the next one, he is a great teacher.
On your suggestions what would you do if? I have always had plenty of non perishable food on hand and water.
Thank you for all you do for the arts. I will be watching. I am also signed for Watercolor Live and Plein Air Live next year.
Thanks Eric.
The best thing I read this time. I think if people don’t have problems, they create them. As a result, they suffer and cry.
Regards, Eugene
I enjoyed reading your piece this morning, lots to think about even though it is difficult. We are completely dependent on too many segments of our society over which we have no control. Thanks for your thoughts!
“One earth” should be “on earth”— apparently, my autocorrect hasn’t had its coffee yet 😆
Truth. We are seeing the unprecedented loss of Liberty in the USA— something so extreme, we would’ve laughed and said, “you’re insane” if someone said this to us 20 or so years ago. What you say is very sobering— and you are certainly not a “conspiracy theorist” or extremist prepper for pointing out this truth. Problem is, the only people who would call you that (or others) are the ones who are so sheltered and privileged, they believe the USA is its own planet and not just a country that is susceptible to all the same evils every other country one Earth is…thank you for bringing truth to light.
With anguish, I agree with you, HJ! How eloquently you put it all. Thank you for speaking your mind. It is so important as many are still in Cognitive Dissonance, as Eric pointed out! It’s crucial that people do not just take a back seat, but that they see clearly and become vocal for our shared future. And that they take a considered approach to life, instead of just going with the flow. Thank you again, to you HJ and again to Eric for opening and illuminating the state of things, as they are. So important!
I’ve always advocated for “Alternative.” Same thing. You have got to know what your alternatives are.
I got my BA in Art and later realized that I would starve if I did not have something else to fall back on.
So, I got my Masters’s Degree in Urban Planning and had a successful career. I never gave up my art
but could not devote the time to painting until I retire.
Enjoy your Sunday coffee chats.
Spreading kindness and friendliness with every one we meet. Stay healthy. Nurture our children. Promote Scouting. Get in touch with nature and the creation. Learn how to cook and survival skills. Have fun.
It’s always good to have a plan B. Also, Thanks again for a great 4 days of Pastel Live. Thank you.
Incite fun should be “inciteful”
Hi Eric!
Thanks so much for your latest issue of Sunday Morning Coffee! So incite fun! Most of us in the USA have not had to deal with many of the potential issues you discussed! It really made me think about how blessed most of the people I know are.
I wish I had been able to view the pastel sessions, but summer is an incredibly busy time for me. Do you have any plans of just selling a download of the pastel sessions? I think I would be quite interested in viewing it at my leisure.
Regards,
Linda Alyea