Rolling out of bed naturally, I head to the bathroom, flip the light switch I’ve hit every morning for over a decade — and something feels wrong. I’m not struggling to find a switch or bumping into walls or tripping over suitcases. Today is the first normal Sunday I’ve had in weeks. It’s glorious.
There is no better feeling than the coziness of my own bed and the familiarity of my own house after weeks away.
I just returned from three weeks abroad, plus a week of driving, and a week at one of my artist retreats. I’ve been living out of a suitcase and realizing that I’ve not had a mental break in over four years. The candle has been burning at both ends, and the life of constant business, events, shows, columns, and running a company had me lost, burned out, and even a little unenthusiastic.
Yet this week, I’m a new man, refreshed and filled with ideas and the excitement to implement them. Problems and challenges bounce off my chest like bullets off Superman. I no longer have to fight through miles of spiderwebs in my brain. My burnout is gone.
Funny thing — I did not know I was burned out. Like all of us, I just keep plowing forward, doing what I need to do to survive. But there have been clues. Ideas were harder to come by, especially fresh ones. And I caught myself being a little grumpy in some tough moments in meetings. Very unlike the normal me. It was time for a break, but work had other plans for me.
The reality is that I went for four years without a break. Most of us did. When Covid hit, I launched a YouTube show called Art School Live. I did it because I knew everyone was lost and freaking out, and they needed someone to be there for them. I went live every day, seven days a week at 12 noon, for seven solid months. Then, because it was so hard on me and my staff, doubling our workload, I cut down from seven days a week to five days a week. Then last year I started replaying some old shows a couple of days a week and only doing three days live. Though I loved doing the show, I needed a break.
That natural break came when we made our first Fine Art Trip to Europe in four years. This was our 11th trip to see museums and art behind the scenes. And though it was fun and not especially challenging work, it’s not like I can sleep in or skip a day. And you can’t completely relax or let your hair down because you’re with customers all day for a couple of weeks.
But following the two weeks of art touring, and being around amazing art every day, I needed a vacation. So we took one. Five days in Majorca. No art, just being tourists, eating lots of gelato and tapas and being absorbed in the local culture.
But here’s the trick that worked so beautifully to give me a refreshed attitude, new ideas, and enthusiasm about getting back … and it’s a great way to overcome burnout.
You have to disappear from the world, bury your head in the sand, and ignore everything.
Here’s what I mean.
Once we started our official vacation, I set up a security net around my brain.
- No reality. I was in Spain to escape reality. I wanted to pretend I lived there. Thankfully my wife speaks Spanish fluently. So we tried to avoid using English whenever possible. I didn’t want to see or hear anything about America. I didn’t want to eat American food, or deal with other Americans. Being in another country is a great way to escape.
- No news. My wife is pretty good about keeping me posted about the world. But I asked her not to tell me anything about the news. No war, no conflict, no crisis. I told her she could tell me anything once we landed in America. I avoided all TV news in any language, and I refused to look at headlines on the newspapers as I walked by. I simply did not want to know and assumed I could do nothing about it anyway.
. - No social media. I took the entire week away from social media. Though I did occasionally check messages for practical reasons, I did not open them if they were not relevant to a need on a trip. It was hard. My addiction to social media means always picking up my phone. It was hard to overcome, but I stayed off all social media feeds for an entire week. Of course social media tends to get newsy and political too. So it was another filter from the news.
- No English-language media. I love watching TV in foreign countries. It’s fun to see new products, shows we’ve never seen, in a language I can’t speak. And it’s a good way to learn some words. But I would not watch anything in English. Flipping through the channels, I avoided CNN, BBC, and even things like Discovery, if they were in English. Avoiding English has been a mental break.
- No e-mail. I refused to check e-mail, and I asked my assistant to deal with it all. She knows not to call or text me for any reason unless it’s critical. The only communication we had was about flights.
- No texting. I made the mistake of checking texts one day early in the week, and because a colleague had sent me a note about something, I got stressed out and I laid awake all night ruminating about a particular problem. It’s my own fault; I allowed it to bother me. But I should have not checked. So I did not text or check text the rest of the week.
I never really consider myself stressed out, but I realized from this experience just how much stress there is in my life. I don’t mind it; I thrive on solving problems or facing challenges. But I think the key to living among stress is the ability to escape it and separate yourself from it.
Now, after my little weekly experiment, I plan to spend weekends off of social media, e-mail, and texting. Nothing can be that important, right?
On a typical night before bed, I’m on social media for a couple of hours, just doom scrolling. That ends now. I’ll replace it with painting time or hobby time. Let’s see if I can do it.
We tell ourselves that we can go on vacation and stay in touch on e-mail. That’s a mistake, and I tell my employees not to do it, to avoid work 100 percent. You may think the world will fall apart without you, but you need an escape. And a week without any business e-mail will do more good than you realize.
What about you? What are you stressing about?
Do you need an escape?
We can’t always go to a foreign country, or travel at all, but we can take reality breaks from media and social media for a weekend or even a week.
The end result is you’ll be happier, you’ll have to find other things to replace all that scrolling time, and you’ll grow from the experience.
If you can’t put your phone down to enjoy a conversation at dinner, your addiction is impacting your life and relationships, whether you realize it or not. My kids were always pointing it out to me. So I need to stop the addiction. I’m not sure if I could leave my phone at home, but it’s worth a try.
At Thanksgiving, just around the corner, friends tell me all phones go into a basket for dinner. Otherwise everyone is always looking at their phone and missing everything that’s going on.
What did we do before we became addicted to our phones, social media, and the news?
Happily I have my hobbies of painting and woodworking to escape to. If you don’t have anything, find something. It will do you a world of good. But most importantly, try to escape. You’ll thank me later.
Eric Rhoads
On my trip I met a guy, and the conversation went like this….
Me: What do you do outside of work?
Him: Not much, really. I read the paper and check my investments.
Me: Do you have any hobbies or interests?
Him: Nope.
Me: What will you do when you retire?
Him: Probably die or play a lot of golf.
Me: So you play golf?
Him: Nope. But I’ll probably take it up because that’s what all my friends do.
Me: So you’re looking forward to it?
Him: Not really.
My best advice: Find something now. Don’t wait. Whether it’s bird-watching or stamp-collecting, it’s important to have something else. If for no other reason than because of what I mentioned above.
Tens of thousands of people have used our website PaintTube.tv to discover how to paint. Maybe there is something there for you.
I just finished our online Realism Live seminar yesterday. Our next one is about watercolor, in January. You can learn about it at WatercolorLive.com.
Absolute truth Eric, love the part where everyone places their cell phones in the basket and somehow manage to survive the Thanksgiving!
Hi Eric, glad you are unwinding, you work very hard, I don’t know how you do it! I know what you mean about having a phone addiction. I use a landline for calls and a desktop for social media – which helps. Social media is the real addiction for me and with your help, yes your help, I’m cutting down on social media and instead, working more on my art. So I thank you for inspiring me to get back to creating, enjoying the pleasures of painting en plein air and the beauty that surrounds us everywhere.
P.S. – I’m finding time to read your book as well, thank you for that and I hope your got my “thank you ” gift to show my appreciation for what you do for artists everywhere!
“Congratulations for finding a life after social media! Me too! I am a writer (into the dark) /Author. As per one mentor of mine named Harvey Stanbroough. (Check out StoneThreadPuablishing. com.)
I have another mentor : Sheila Bender (TEACHER/Facilitator/ Author) who introduced me to the pleasure of writing poetry. (UPROOTED COPYRIGH 2021) I was diagnosed with Parkinson’s in 2018 and thought my painting career was over. However, my fellow aartist , Rosie Wolf Williams, from Bennington, Vermont insisted that I should teach her watercolor. Amazingly, my tremor disappears for about 45-minutes which gives me a good window. My goal is to complete one painting a week for the next year. I have succeeded in that challenge.
I have written for NaNoWRiMo TWICE (50KWords in 30 days. whcih became _LISTEN by P.J. & S.E. Turner Copyrite: 2016 and BLUE also in 2016.
Taught Middle School for 36 years (the last ten years teaching ART (ahem!) .Your Sunday Moring Coffee woke me up to new possibilities and I signed up for your three-Day W/C workshop. Thanks. By the way, December 9th I will celebrate my 90th Birthday.
Great post Eric.
Thank you for sharing these insights that we all can use. Best wishes to you and your family.
Enjoy playing your music, rather than listening to someone else’s.
One art form informs another.
Cheers!
Wonderful advice…
Take a proper break on a regular basis. You need it and certainly deserve it.
After working 7 days straight, your post makes packing up all the files and spending the rest of today and tomorrow painting just that much easier! Thank you – sincerely, Linda
The importance of what you have written here cannot be underestimated. The world we have all come to live in now has more demands and attractions/addictions than ever before in recorded history.
We have to consciously make the decision to give ourselves space, to take long-enough breaks and to realize the improved condition we are in because of these decisions.
Thank you for bringing your attention to all this. What you do is so very valuable to many and so taking care of yourself as you are now doing, is a vital matter.
Again, Thank You!
I too look forward to your Sunday ‘talks.’ I always feel somewhat enriched by your insights.
YAY, good for you. Back before I retired, I had a high stress job which involved commuting to Europe once or twice a week, mananaging the User side of a multi national end user information system project. Fun (sometimes, yes), mentally exhausting (sometimes, yes), exhilarating (sometimes, yes), hard work (yes), stressful (who knew, yes); burnt out, yes! One Friday I just hit a wall and decide. I was going to quit. My boss was nowhere to be seen so I went home that weekend knowing I was quitting Monday morning. I wrote my resignation letter. I had the best commest most relaxing weekend I’d ever had. I went to work on Monday and again. Couldn’t find my boss show waited to Tuesday on Tuesday. I went in and saw my boss well. He managed to calm me down and to give me a couple of concessions and ooh I got a raise out of it too. And I stayed on, but big lesson I made a point of taking time for myself. One evening a week. I would meet a friend and we would quilt. I made Fridays, as long as I was in the country, date night with my husband it really started to make a difference.
We all have to take time to listen to the sounds of silence. Keep sane, we love you and what you bring to us.
I hear you. I’m addicted but I have to just avoid media for a few days or weeks to come back to center. I realize how it doesn’t serve me to have constant drama coming at me all the time.
Excellently stated. For those of us who don’t get to travel, reading a good novel can be a very helpful escape. I recently removed the Facebook app from my phone because, I could no longer get to my friends and sites I’ve been enjoying for the past five years. All it would allow me to do was shop, date or gamble , none of which I would ever do on line. I could not find anyone to fix it without charging a fee. So, I saw it as a scam and removed Facebook. Has there been withdrawal? Yep. But it has been good. As you say, more painting time has been of great benefit. 👍🏼🙏❤️
100% true. Thank you
Thank you, Eric, for a much-needed reminder about the power of turning off outside intrusions. I needed that!
I agree Eric, & I know how hard it is & a vacation without internet, cell phone & all media is so healthy! Praying for you. Ken
I will thank you now not later. Thank you.
I really like what you told us in Realism Live last week.
I am sure going to start my morning with a glass of water, more time with God, acting silly, happy and dancing! We are going to get a treadmill for the days when it’s icy, snowed in and hard to stay vertical during a walk!
The world around us may be in Turmoil, good is evil and evil is good…but if we fall into the “fear” that the world is pushing, and focus on the positive news we can turn down Social Media, stop caring what others think, and work on being a better person, a better friend, a better partner, or a better worker… the fears of this life fade and become less important.
We have a vehicle with which to display our feelings, our beauty, and our experiences. I believe there is much healing within our creative endeavors.
I am back doing pastels after stopping when I unexpectantly lost my sister to brain cancer 4 years ago, she was my teacher, my mentor in pastels and many other artistic endeavors. My pastel piece is half way done…I now have a better peace inside which will finish it and get into landscapes again!
I am a potter by trade, but I find I am a better artist each time I learn a different medium. My work changes, my creativity increases and the colors get more harmonious. I have a peace when I work with clay. I am finding that same peace and excitement when I paint!
Thank you for your positive influence, and all the guest artists! I admire and enjoyed all the artists last week! But Cindy Bensons Landscapes and DL Moodys work with Nature resonated the most with me.
But I feel all the demonstrations were amazing and will play a part improving my artistic wisdom and work. This was my first time attending Realism Live and have already signed up for next year! Thank you to everyone, all staff that worked so hard to make this a pleasant experience, especially Christie! Thank you Eric! Thank you artists! Have a positive and beautiful winter!
Jul Wing Gapusan, Reno Nevada
I turned off the news. I didn’t realize how addicted I had become. I kept finding myself thinking I need to turn on the news to see what’s happening. Wrong ! It’s made such a difference and I am so much more relaxed.
Creativity goes away when you’re stressed . A painter, to really create, must be “in the moment “and being in the moment for me is relaxing. After all yesterday is gone and the future is undetermined and we’ll figure it out when it happens.
Good message we all need a reminder.
Great advice Eric, especially for those of us who are visual as well as verbal but would much rather paint than talk.
I don’t have a cellphone in my studio and got rid of my beeper along with my first wife years ago.
Keep up the good work!
Best,
Ron Gallo
Eric, the people in this world are in a time of extreme hostility and fear and distrust, it may seem like you cannot fix that, but you are helping to heal our attitudes toward one another, Art is the Bridge! When you call out the countries represented as viewers watch Art School Live and other productions, the proof is right there. As we share the pursuit of art in our lives, we are reaching out to each other and acknowledging our common humanity. An example that comes to mind is Kevin McPherson’s time spent in China, the children who gathered around him as he painted and got to try out his paint and brushes, are young adults now with a seed of warmth toward Americans. Eric take care of yourself, you are an absolute gift to us all. Edyth, your 92 year old fan in Fredericksburg
Eric, I always love to read your Sunday morning musings. There always is a little or a lot I can relate to. Keep em coming 😊
Nothing is worth dying for. I’m glad you have found your limitations. Thank you for all you do, I really appreciate it.
Glad you were able to rest ! Shielding myself from depressing media is a MUST . I’m criticized for it , but it is self preservation . I’m so impressed by your work ethic but yes , You deserve a break ! My hope is that you are able to build many more into your life . We have enjoyed the guests on art school live and even the cocktail hours ! You are missed but it’s a good trade off to keep you around in top shape 🤩
Eric…you are a star…
Kind regards
Keith
I retired after 27 years from an extremely stressful job that I honestly didn’t realize was killing me. But I was having issues with my heart racing, insomnia, and a rash that started on one elbow and eventually covered my entire body. Before I retired I had started painting again and it was a bit of an escape, but having the time to paint on my own schedule, attend workshops, become involved in a local art center has been such an eye-opener for me. I’m literally still working full time, but doing what I want to do and when I want to do it and my health has improved dramatically. The rash is gone, the racing heart symptoms have reduced from daily to once a month or so. I sleep well at night and I’ve lost lots of weight and my A1C is back in the healthy range (without medication). So, it took a few years to overcome the health problems; but having art in my life has made a huge difference. And while my monthly retirement check pays most of the household bills, my art sales and teaching fees have helped to offset the difference. Ironically, I really loved working with my former clients but the job itself was dangerous and mentally and physically difficult. Even generous paid leave didn’t help much because the whole time I was on vacation I worried about the pile of work I would return to face. It took almost six months away from that job to finally realize I didn’t need to worry about it anymore. I’m just grateful I was able to retire in my mid-50s.
Painting is wonderful, and I have personally become involved with nature journaling, wedding two of my great loves. Gardening is another great hobby. I keep a garden journal in a sketchbook. And then there is reading. I read lots for information, but since I have retired, reading just for pleasure and entertainment is delicious! Try reading at bedtime instead of scrolling devices. Oh, and read from a real book. It’s like having a friend.
I enjoy your Sunday conversations. Thank you.
Susan Loeb
My life got so much less stressful within the last couple of years when I quit watching the news every night. I transitioned to watching just for the weather forecast and then realized I could get the weather on apps anytime I wanted so I just quit watching the news altogether. I partially thank COVID for this because that was all the news talked about. I just got sick of hearing it.
The story of the gentleman having a hobby when he retires brings to mind a retirement seminar I went to put on by our state retirement system. It was geared for people that were planning on retiring in the next 3-5 years. I was in the position that my wife had accepted a job out of state so I was retiring in less than 2 months. The only thing I remembered out of that 2 hour seminar was that you should have a hobby or something that you enjoy doing that will keep your mind and body engaged. Most people that die not long after retiring do so because they basically sit around and “give up.” I took up painting in 2019, two years after retiring, because I have always enjoyed being creative. I’ve played guitar since 1986 and really enjoy that escape from reality. In fact, as soon as I post this, I’m going to play while I wait for my wife to get ready for church!