Today I’m excited. We’ve celebrated Thanksgiving and our triplets are home. College this year has no spring break, so they will all be home through January. 

Though I could get used to this empty-nester life, there is no joy quite like the joy of having my family together as one. But things will be different. Their taste of independence isn’t blending well with our need for some household rules — simple things like showing up for an occasional meal, or not coming in at five in the morning. We’ll have to make some adjustments on our end and try not to revert to high school rules now that they are spreading their little college freedom wings.

COVID Blessings

Before COVID, the kids were working, hanging with friends, and had mostly disappeared from the house. Then  COVID brought a few months at home as a family, a chance to be together and reconnect. And now, though we’re not in lockdown here (but being careful), we’ll have a couple more months to be together as a family.

Perhaps the same thing is happening to you.

Big Effort

I once learned something from my dad, something I never really knew was happening while we were growing up. I learned that he was deliberate in his effort to make memories.

As the beneficiary of that with my brothers, I assumed those memories just happened. But in fact, many of them were planned, and many of them took a great deal of effort.

Mega Memories

I can remember family vacations, with five of us packed into our old Oldsmobile. I can remember being in our T-bird convertible, breaking down on a one-lane road at a pass in Colorado and having to hitchhike into town. I can remember being terrified as we pulled our Airstream trailer up a steep incline, wondering if the car could make it. I remember visiting the White House, the Smithsonian, Mount Vernon, and having flashbacks as if I had been there before. I can remember camping on Lake Erie. I recall getting my grandma to ride on the back of a mini bike (I thought she was really old at the time, but she was younger than I am now). I remember the first time I heard my dad swear, when he hurt his finger while working on the boat engine (I was mortified). I can remember my mom bringing home a six-pack of beer, something we never had in our household, so she could wash her hair in it (or so we were told), and hiding it from my grandparents. 

I could go on.

If this were a competition between my parents and us as parents, I’m afraid my parents have done a better job of creating memories than we have, though we’ve created a bunch.

A New Chance

Now, I’m blessed with two months to make memories. And though I’ll be fighting whining kids who want to hang with friends, I’m sure my parents had to battle the same things. The only difference is that they did not have to battle cell phones and video games — though they did have to battle our addiction to black-and-white, then color TV, and shows like Dark Shadows, The Monkees, and Bonanza.

I’m not sure what memories I’m going to create, but I’ve decided I’m willing to endure the unpopularity of pushing through to get them to do something. 

What about you? 

We have the month before, Christmas, and possibly more time in quarantine together, and they will be home till mid-January. What will we do differently this year? What will they remember?

Adversity

I can’t remember much about my wedding, but I can remember when the horse from the horse and buggy pooped during the ceremony and everyone laughed. I can remember stumbling into a couple of guests making love in the sauna during the reception. Sometimes the best memories come from the things that go wrong … like the car breaking down or the horse pooping. 

I suspect you’ll find us all packed into our camper for a weekend trip or two, maybe a longer drive. Or maybe we’ll bake COVID cookies with little icing face masks. I’ve bought some silly turkey hats for Thanksgiving. And I plan to crank up the music for a little dance party. 

Will I be ridiculed? Absolutely. But it will be worth it.

The ultimate test … when my kids are staring at my cold dead body at my funeral, and gathering afterward for a meal, I want them to remember the turkey hats from this Thanksgiving, decorating the Christmas tree and the dance party. I don’t want them to be thinking that we never did anything or had any fun.

I have special memories of my great-grandparents, my grandparents, my aunts and uncles, and my parents and siblings. To me the greatest loss I could experience is not just the loss of those people, it would be the loss of the memories they created, intentionally or unintentionally.

What memories will you create with your family?

Be deliberate. The best things in life often take the most effort.

Eric Rhoads

PS: Monday will be day #250 of doing a daily “broadcast” on social media. We’re getting an average of 10,600 views a day and exposing tens of thousands to art lessons live. Tomorrow I’ll give away some big prizes and we’re holding The Battle of the Mediums. Four artists painting in oil, watercolor, gouache, and pastel at once, so see who wins the prize. And we have prizes for you that we are giving away during the live 12noon broadcast. Join us here at noon. 

I’m really excited. Here I was worried about surviving and staying in business, and because we pivoted to virtual online art conferences, we’re probably going to survive. Yay! But I’ve got to keep it going to keep all these wonderful people employed so they can make memories for their families. If you think you might like to learn watercolor, even if you don’t believe you have the talent, sign up for my Watercolor Live learning event in January. Somehow we’ve managed to get the very best watercolor masters in the world to teach, and we’ve also created a Beginner’s Day. I’d be grateful if you would check it out and maybe give it to someone as a Christmas gift.

No matter how much we romanticize the first Thanksgiving, those families had been through incredible hardships, spending months at sea. They endured endless storms and giant swells, where they lay on the floorboards of the creaking ship, so sick, perhaps wishing they would die, but praying the ship would not break apart like others had and leave them to drown. Men, women, children, babies, crammed aboard crowded, stuffy, damp, cold ships, without the comforts of the homes they had left in England and Holland. Only half of those who set off on the voyage survived.

Disagreement

Yet life in England had become unbearable for some, and they wanted a better life. Since King Henry VIII’s separation from the Catholic Church back in 1534 and the founding of the Church of England, there had been vast disagreement about religion among the citizens. The Puritans — the people who became the pilgrims — were neither Roman Catholic nor Church of England, and they did not embrace the government’s rules for how to worship.

Wanting to Be Free

Though not in chains, the Puritans, and most English citizens, were not truly free. If they said the wrong thing, discussed something unpopular, were critical of the king, or even complained about their lack of food, they could be beaten, or locked in the stocks for public ridicule. Some were imprisoned or even executed. All because they wanted a better life. And they wanted to be able to worship freely, and not be forced to attend the king’s church. They were not free to pray to their own God in their own way. 

To escape England, many of the Puritans moved to Holland, where they became peasants, living an even harder life. After 10 years there, often having nothing, some scraped and saved to pay for a voyage to a new land, where they could be landowners and hope to be free.

Being Giving

It’s no wonder they had such a vast appreciation for what little they had when they arrived. It’s no wonder they developed a spirit of sharing, and were willing to give others. In the first years, they shared their first harvest with one another and with the Native Americans.

The Prevailing Spirit

Whether or not the tales of that first Thanksgiving, in 1621, are true, and though there is said to be a dark side, it’s the spirit of Thanksgiving — the feeling of being free, and the desire to help others less fortunate — that makes Thanksgiving what it is today. 

It was Abraham Lincoln who made Thanksgiving an official holiday, in 1863. Thanksgiving is about a giving spirit, wanting to be together, and the ability to speak freely without the fear of repercussions.

Perfection Isn’t Possible

The world the pilgrims left us isn’t perfect. Some are critical of their ways, and there are ugly stories that surround them and their treatment of Native Americans. Like all who have become Americans, they, and we, are imperfect. But true perfection cannot be accomplished, because each of has a different definition of what that would be.

Look around the table today. 

Look at the family members around you. Or think of those friends and family who normally would be gathered but who cannot be here with you today because of COVID-19. And think for a moment of those we have lost, and whose seat at the table is empty. 

Look at the imperfections in the people around you. 

Each of us carries with us the imprint of our DNA, the impact of our upbringing and surroundings, and the experiences of our lives. Each of us has imperfections. 

As you gaze at those around you, try to embrace their imperfections, and ask yourself, “Are they truly imperfections, or is it simply me being overly judgmental? Am I being harsh?”

Then think about yourself and the imperfect moments in your own life, when your expectations for yourself were not met, where others may have judged you. Think about how you felt being judged or criticized.

Embrace Where We Are

Today, embrace one another. Embrace your imperfections and be thankful we’re all alive. Perhaps this year, we have more of an appreciation of our ability to gather, and the ability to be with those we love. Or perhaps you’re unable to gather, you’re alone, and others are missing you because we’ve been told that gathering together is unhealthy. 

Be thankful for the imperfections of the world, and the imperfections of others who do not believe as you believe. 

Embrace others who believe differently than you … a different higher power, a different lifestyle, a different political leaning. 

Most important, embrace our freedom. 

Though freedom is fragile, be thankful we’re not being told what we can and cannot do. Be thankful more and more is not being taken from us, making it difficult to survive. Be thankful we can worship freely. 

Casting blame is easy — being critical of others, being critical of our differences. But this melting pot of America, and this melting pot of personalities in our families, is, in fact, perfection in God’s eyes. We’ve been asked not to judge, but to leave that to Him.

On this day, embrace who we are, and soak in the joy when we can be together, even though we may argue about football teams, politics, or religion. 

Be thankful you can gather, and that you can argue. 

Small Screens Down

Seek common ground. Talk about the good times, the memories, the loved ones who have passed. Talk about ideas, look for what lights up the eyes of those around the table, and patiently listen and be less eager to jump down their throats in disagreement. And throw all the phones in a basket so no one is looking at a screen on this special day.

Someone at the table may not be with us next year. We cannot predict who, but we do know, in spite of all our disagreements, we will wish we had known them better, listened to them more, and spent more time with them once they are gone. 

Our Sad Day

Earlier this year my 18-year-old son had a heart attack, died, and barely was able to be revived. His mother and I laid on a cold vinyl couch at his side for 10 days in a hospital, praying the doctors and nurses could save him, which thankfully they did. I’m grateful his chair is not empty this year, and, because he will have a lifelong health issue, I’ll know each additional Thanksgiving is a blessing. He needs me to listen, to embrace who he is, and not to judge him.

Though sadness could spoil my day because I’m missing loved ones in isolation, I’m grateful we can still talk to catch up. We deeply miss those who have ventured beyond life before us, so let’s embrace those who share our lives today. 

Inventing Memories

Make this day, this moment at the table, the most memorable Thanksgiving ever. Seek out laughter, fun, and making memories that will be imprinted for the rest of our lives. Create joy, play games, tell jokes, make some COVID Christmas ornaments out of face masks, or do a craft together. And most of all, put the imperfections aside and embrace each person for who they are, whether or not they are who you want them to be.

Remember, someone along the way embraced you, encouraged you, and gave you joy and hope. Chances are, you love being around that person. Today, be that person for others. 

Embrace the imperfections and celebrate our ability to be free to gather.

Eric Rhoads

PS: I’m deeply grateful for you today. This little letter, which I normally write from the rickety old porch of my little Texas homestead on Sunday mornings, seems to have been given wings to spread across the world. Each time you’ve shared it with someone else, you’ve given me a chance to ring a bell, create an “aha” moment, or stimulate a thought that might somehow be helpful. I’m told we have a quarter million subscribers, and that the average passalong by each reader is about three times. Chances are I don’t know you, but know that I care about you, I want to listen to you, and I embrace you for who you are. 

This weekly missive isn’t created by some PR firm, and I’m not a celebrity. I’m just a guy who started writing a weekly letter to my kids (triplets) in hopes they would someday pick them up and read them as adults, and know what their dad was thinking, and maybe, I could help them capture some of what I’ve learned in life to help them get through their own lives. I once mentioned it to a friend, who asked for a copy, and that seed has resulted in the spread.

Though I don’t make my living as an artist, I do paint. I’m the guy who never believed in himself. I could not draw a stick figure, and I had no talent. But the lift I received from my mom, and then later from my wife, resulted in my finding my way and discovering that I could learn the painting process, even without talent. This grew out of a small seed planted at a young age, and the encouragement to believe I could do it, when I could not believe in myself. 

Little seeds can result in a spread that can create mighty forests. We can spread the seeds of weeds that choke the growth of trees, or we can spread the seeds that grow into the great redwoods. We can choose to spread negatives and criticism, or we can spread encouragement that will give the lift others need to thrive. 

By the way … if you think you have no talent and don’t believe in yourself, but you’ve always wanted to paint, there are some free lessons I think will make it easy. I’ve taught thousands. It’s called Paint By Note. 

Also, we’re celebrating watercolor with a giant learning event, including a Beginner’s Day, with the top watercolor artists in the world (no exaggeration). It’s coming up in January. It’s called Watercolor Live.

As I opened my eyes, the trickle of water startled me fully awake. Then, once I stopped panicking, thinking the pipes had burst, I realized Laurie and I were camping along the Frio River in our little camper. This was the maiden voyage, and we’re hoping to get to know each other all over again, remembering the best vacation we ever took before kids, which was a couple of weeks in a camper. 

As we speak I’m in a folding chair outside so I don’t wake Laurie, and the sun is streaming in my eyes as the grackles squawk loudly. The reflections on the water are like a color wheel, and later today it will be warm enough to take a dip and kayak down the river a piece. It’s a joy to have a weekend off and to start our empty-nesting life together. 

I’d be lying if I said I was totally disconnected. After all, I still have a cell signal, and hopefully this is still showing up in your inbox. 

Internet Legend

There is a story floating around the Internet about a young boy who tells his pastor father that he would like to go out and pass out flyers to tell people about how God loves them. It was cold and rainy and his dad didn’t want to go, but since they were in a small town, he allowed his son to go out alone. 

Knocking Loudly

The son passed out all but one flyer and was about ready to go home, but he stopped at one more house and knocked, and there was no answer. He knocked again — still no answer. So he walked away. But something made him turn around and knock longer and louder. Soon a frail old woman answered, and the child said he was sorry to interrupt her, but he just wanted to tell her that God loves her and he thought she might like the flyer. She was kind to him, and thanked him.

Interrupting

The following Sunday in church, the pastor asked if anyone wanted to share anything before closing the service, and that old woman said, “Yes, I’d like to.” She had lost her husband, it had been a couple of years, and she was lonely, worn, and tired. She had decided to kill herself, and was ready to go ahead with it when she heard the knock. But the knock went away. So just as she was about to do something that couldn’t be undone, she heard the knock again. She decided it must be important, so she went down to answer the door. 

The story goes on to say that from this little angel of a boy, the hope she received gave her a renewed spirit to live. She had appeared in the church for the first time in her life.

When this story arrived in my in-box, I enjoyed it, passed it to some friends, and then started thinking about my own life and the moments where perfect timing occurred. In some cases it was timing to help me, and other times it was the right timing to help others.

A Frightening Day in Business

One day, about 20 years ago, my bookkeeper told me we could not make our payroll that week. We were $18,726.56 short. I asked if anyone owed money we could collect. There was no one. I just knew I was out of business and had to lay people off. Clearly, at that stage of my life I was not very good at planning or managing. 

Being Exact

Earlier that week a man named Mike had come to work for us. He had just returned from a church retreat and explained that he learned it was important to pray for specifics. So, I went into my office, worried and tearful, and I asked for help. Exactly $18,726.56. And though I asked, I did not really believe I’d get that help, so I was trying hard to sell what I could and try to collect something in advance. 

Two Angels

With only two days to go till payroll, I had no solution and was ready to inform my team that I could not pay them. My receptionist buzzed me that I had a call, and it was a client, Marty, from one of the radio networks. I can remember his words clearly. “Eric, because it’s the end of the year, we have some leftover budget. Can we prepay some ads for next year?” Of course, I said yes, but he did not indicate how much or when it would come. Yet the next day a FedEx arrived with exactly $18,726.56 on the check. The exact amount needed to save our business.

Two people had stepped in on my behalf. Mike, who told me about specifics, and Marty, who called to prepay. That moment strengthened my faith. 

Perfect Timing

When I heard the story about the little boy, my mind flashed to that moment. But it also flashed to several moments when people had said things like, “I can’t believe you called and said that, it was exactly what I needed at this moment.” Or, “You brought me an answer I’ve been struggling with.”

Can You Hear Me Now?

There are some who believe we are all interconnected on almost a cellular level, and that we’re on certain “frequencies” with others. That’s beyond my level of understanding, and I don’t really know what to believe, but I can say that something or someone is connecting many of us.

Needing Someone

Probably dozens, maybe hundreds, have connected with me at the perfect time. They have helped me or I have helped them. There were times when I was lonely, sad, depressed, and feeling blue and someone suddenly showed up for no reason at all, pulling me out of it. 

You Talkin’ to Me?

When we started the daily broadcasts on Facebook and YouTube, I started hearing from hundreds of people who would say things like, “How did you know I needed to hear that today? You were speaking directly to me.”  It happens to Laurie and me all the time. We’ll go to church and think the pastor is targeting us with a tailored message. “How did he know?” we’ll wonder.

I can even say it happens more than ever, which I think is because I’m learning to pay attention to the little tugs, the little tinge of feeling that I need to call someone or visit them. 

Sweet Inconvenience

And like the little boy in the rain, it seems that every time I don’t want to do something and I do it anyway, I never regret it because it turns out to my benefit or that of someone else. Before our recent Fall Color Week, I was so used to being home that it was a struggle to get up at four in the morning to catch an airplane. The night before, I was whining about it because I was experiencing back pain, and I strongly considered asking someone to step in for me. But I sucked it up and went, and the result was that I had several good things happen to me, including invitations into two good galleries and a possible donor for my TV show. But also, in several instances, I was able to help people who had nowhere to turn because of personal tragedy. In each case, I heard something like, “I don’t know what I’d have done if you had not been here for me.”

Though I’ve trained myself to be a planner, I’m very much a pinball, bouncing from one paddle to the next, in response to the callings in my head. 

Has this happened to you?

Have you had moments where you were connected at the perfect time with the perfect person with the perfect message? 

One of the reasons I encourage silence and thinking time, and not spending your life on small and big screens, is that the quiet helps us tune in. Someone needs you for some reason, and when you get that quiet whisper in your ear or that tinge to call someone, do it.

And if you can’t be troubled because it seems like too much work or inconvenience, do it anyway. It will be a sweeter result because of the sacrifice.

Someone once told me that every adult is a hurting little child inside, and that they may be too tough or macho to speak up. But if you can open up a crack, be there for them, and listen, you might change their life.

How Could This Even Be?

I’ve told the story many times of being stuck in a cab for an hour — and it changed the entire direction of my life forever. Why, on that day, did I lock my keys in the car? Why did I decide to take a two-hour cab ride instead of calling a local locksmith? How was it that the cab driver was in Miami but happened to be from West Palm Beach and able to introduce me to the art instructor who introduced my heart to art? 

You may say it was serendipity or coincidence. Maybe. I like to think there was a plan that put me in a vulnerable position, stilled my heart, made me talk to someone I otherwise wouldn’t talk to, and got my attention. 

Special Delivery 

I continually encounter people who it feels were sent to me, as if they were angels on earth. And I’m continually surprised that a random feeling I should call someone results in my being that angel for them. I’m guessing it happens to us all, which I suppose means we are interconnected somehow.

At this time when half the population is frustrated or hurting, and a time when people are worried about COVID and other crazy things in the world, listen for the tinge.

Eric Rhoads

PS: Just for grins, pick up the phone today and call three people you have not talked to for weeks or months or years. Just tell them you were thinking about them and wanted to say hello. Engage. And look for an opportunity to say something nice about them or bring up a fond memory to lift their spirit. Don’t ask for anything, and don’t tell them you’re calling because I suggested it. Don’t e-mail. Call. That call might lift a spirit, change a mood, offer an idea, or provide something you need. Don’t think about it, don’t over-examine it. Just do it.

Speaking of “just do it” and life-changing events… when we did our two other virtual art conferences, I heard lots of “This was life-changing.” I’d like that for you. Even if your brain is saying, “I can’t paint, I don’t have talent,” go visit WatercolorLive.com and just do it. You’ll find something new inside you, and you might love it. 

Quiet and stillness fill the cool Texas air. Not a single leaf is fluttering, and the deep orange morning light entertains my eyes with streaks of color as it blasts the front porch of my art studio. Morning or afternoon light glow is something I never noticed before picking up a paintbrush. 

Silence is a good thing on any morning. I love awakening early, before anyone else is awake, and sitting quietly with my thoughts. There is a special place, right between getting up and waking up. It’s as if it’s a time when my thoughts are more abstract, more free.

Hello Silence, My Old Friend

Today silence is especially welcome. We are all numb from a year or more of election drivel, of intense dialogue coming at our brains from every direction. I’m wishing all the political signs would come down, and I’m thankful the advertisements have stopped. I’m ready for silence, for quiet, for peace. Though I’m not sure that wish will come true anytime soon, which is why each of us must look for the means to find solace in our own way.

Trophies for Every Child

Sadly, there are sore losers, and frighteningly, I’m seeing more name-calling and anger than any time in the last year. In a world where every child receives a trophy, where we must not hurt any feelings, it’s a time when we all have to swallow a dose of reality.

How We Deal with Losses

No one cherishes the idea of losing, but in any contest we enter, we understand that not everyone will be a winner. We are each dealt our cards, and we have to handle the outcome. It seems to me that how we deal with our losses is what defines who we really are. Are we dignified and high-road? Or are we low-road and sore losers? 

Each time any of us is challenged by a loss or by adversity, we’re made stronger. Pain always equals gain. And though we don’t want to face our pain, we always grow from it.

Why? Why?

Though it may seem odd, my prayers are not a wish to Santa Claus in hopes of gifts for Christmas. Though I’m tempted to ask for more, or for perfect outcomes, or for winning, I try to ask for what I need, but in all cases, I simply ask for God’s will. I figure He knows a lot better than me. And, as I browse my life, I’m thankful that my prayers of the past were not all answered. Though our losses may be painful and seem unreasonable, there is always a plan, and trusting in that plan and learning lessons is helpful. Learning to trust may be the hardest lesson of all when things in our lives don’t seem to make sense. Why would this happen to me? Why not? Maybe pain is forging a lesson we all need.

When Pain Is OK

The absolute best things that have happened in my life have always emerged from the most difficult and painful moments. It’s when maturity sets in. Those moments make you raw, which makes you sit up and take notice of things you were not seeing. That’s why I want my kids to lose from time to time. Though I pray for their safety, I also pray that they face adversity and difficult challenges, because I know that will serve them better than perfect lives. I want them to experience pain, I want them to be frustrated and challenged, I don’t want them to win every contest or do everything they are trying to accomplish in their lives. Their lives will be better, more appreciated, if things are not always as they wish.

A Tough Moment

Flashing back to fourth grade, my life was crushed. My Ds and Fs resulted in my being held back because I’d come in before I was ready to go to school. I was suddenly an outcast. My friends from kindergarten moved on while I stayed back. I was a marked man. And it was no secret from the third-graders, who were now my equals. All of this resulted in a very difficult time making friends. It was a painful time, and I was very angry at my parents. I did not understand it, and I was not mature enough to realize that it was no one’s fault but my own. I blamed my parents, teachers, principal, and others, but I never accepted the blame for my own actions. In hindsight, it made me stronger, made me work harder, made me come out of my shell, and helped me develop skills and coping mechanisms that helped form who I am today. It was not fun at the time, and I’m sure my parents had a tough discussion about whether it was the right thing, but it was.

Pushing a Little Harder

Now that my kids are in college, I look back and realize they needed more pain growing up. They needed to work harder, they needed to be challenged more. We kind of let them decide what they wanted to be involved with, and we felt sorry for the kids whose parents forced them to play sports or take piano lessons. But we may have been wrong, because pushing kids beyond their own wishes develops important skills, and the pain of all those kids pushed to do things resulted in their developing talents and self-esteem, and perhaps a work ethic that gives them an advantage. Though I have few regrets, I can see some lacking life skills because we protected them from pain. 

Tough Love

We have a small monthly cash budget we give our kids in college. They don’t really need much money because meals are covered, but a little for gas or extras is helpful. But we’ve made it clear: They get it on the first of each month, not a day sooner, just like a paycheck, and they have to make their money last. This week one of our kids is already asking for his December money in early November. Though it’s tempting to help, we said no. He needs some pain, he needs to learn to manage his money, he needs the reality of life, and if he needs extra, he needs motivation to go make it. The pain won’t be fun, but it will be better than not having learned how to manage his money once he has a family.

None of us wants to face the hard decisions in life or the tough love moments with our families, yet it’s losses, failures, and pain that make us stronger. We can’t all get our way all the time. Therefore hold your head high, be a high-road person, and move on. And ask, what am I supposed to be learning from this moment in time?

What about you? What lessons should you be seeking?

Eric Rhoads

PS: There has to be more to life than working all the time. Due to quarantines, people are discovering they need something more. As a result of the forwarding of this blog to others, and tens of thousands subscribing, and my “pitch” that art is good for each of us and enriches our souls, I’m hearing of people all over the world who are trying art for the first time. Many are signing up for lessons locally, others are using our videos online, others are watching me at noon ET daily on YouTube and Facebook, where I have artists teaching, and still others are watching the free 3 p.m. ET video of the over 600 art instruction videos we’ve produced. I find this very encouraging, and I want to help you grow and discover yourself through your art.

A foundation in art is critical, and it starts with learning what we call values (lights and darks). I have a few free lessons to get you started. Hope you’ll check them out. 

Our online virtual conferences are really bringing the world together and teaching thousands of artists worldwide. Our next is in January; it’s called Watercolor Live. Watercolor is a terrific place to start, and we’ve got the world’s finest artists on this 4-day event (Beginner’s Day is one of the days). It’s a great way to dip your toe in the water without the expense or commitment of an in-person event.

The ground is saturated with water, and puddles reflect the deep blue sky above. It’s too cold to write you from the porch this morning, so I’m huddled in my art studio in the chair normally used by models. My heater is blowing warm air over me as I try to shed the goosebumps from the cold. It’s chilly and almost freezing. Fall in Austin lasted less than a week, dropping from the 90s to the 80s and then to the high 30s. The leaves haven’t even changed. I’m hopeful that later on color will come and the temperature will return to the 70s. 

Though we’ve been back less than three weeks, it seems the lake was an eternity ago. I miss its deep green pines, and the scent of pine in the air. I miss our rustic old 140-year-old home, which has no road access, and of course I miss our friends there. But summers are short and life continues elsewhere. And it’s good to be home.

Visiting Dignitaries

Near us on a neighboring lake where we spend our summers, residents have hosted many prominent guests, including every sitting president since Eisenhower, Supreme Court justices, secretaries of state, prime ministers, foreign dignitaries, and actors. About 25 years ago, Gorbachev was a guest of a local resident. 

From Russia with Love

Following the visit of the then-Soviet leader, who at the time was in the midst of perestroika, his hostess was asked by someone … “Would you trust him with the lives of your grandchildren?” Her answer was that he was very charming, very competent and engaging, a remarkable human, and very impressive, but no, she would not trust him with the lives of her grandchildren.

Sometimes questions clarify everything. In spite of all of Gorbachev’s accomplishments, that question brought out the truth. 

A Big Week

This week each of us is faced with a decision. Many believe it’s a life-or-death decision for this country. And if you ask most, in both parties, the world ends if their hero is not elected. Sadly, decisions like this are often more emotional than they are practical. Our emotions control us, and sometimes I catch myself making decisions because I don’t like someone’s personality, their demeanor, or the way they talk. Yet if I had to put priority on what really matters, the emotional reasons would fall toward the bottom of the list. 

Stomping If They Don’t Get Their Way

As always, I avoid sharing my political beliefs or opinions, and I’m turned off by celebrities who try to sway voters with their influence. (Though I’m no celebrity — it would be shallow of me to think people could be swayed by my influence.) I have more respect for individual thinking than to believe you can’t think for yourself. Even celebrities who have threatened to move out of the U.S. are just stomping their feet because they might not get their way. They always threaten, but they never do it, and none of us care anyway. I’d be more heartbroken over losing a neighbor I loved than someone I like in the movies who I don’t even know.

The Finger

On Tuesday our index fingers will waver between which button to push, which lever to flip. And it’s important to remember the weight of your decision. It’s not a casual decision, and it should not be based on who has the best ads, who has the most negative things to say about the other, or some probably-misinformed opinion shared with anger on social media. One Twitter post said it best: “If one negative ad can sway you as a voter, you’re not thinking about this deeply enough.”

The Death of Journalism

Though non-political, I am disturbed by the polarized nature of information. Balance does not exist anymore. We tend to watch one outlet or another that supports only our own viewpoint. None seem to represent both points of view — though that’s what true journalism once did — and we are all worse off for it. Those of us who try to do balanced homework may not be able to find reliable information anywhere. When was the last time you tuned in to hear a different point of view and were willing to just listen and not judge?

So, since unbiased research via the media doesn’t seem possible, how do we decide which button to push? 

Is this the time for the question about trusting the candidates with the lives of your grandchildren or future grandchildren?

You see, the weight of your decision comes down to that — with every vote, no matter what party. All issues, social issues, party leanings, courts, and future decisions boil down to our future, the future of our kids and grandkids and great-grandkids. And it’s about our own lives going forward.

Most people put less time into their voting decisions than into choosing from a menu at dinner.  My friend and mentor Keith always reminds me that decisions of importance require thinking time, and critical questions. 

The Future of Your Family

If you think of each question you have with the grandchildren and future generations test, it may help bring clarity to your decision making. Thinking in questions helps me remove the emotion from my own decisions. 

If you knew someone who wanted to have control over the future of your children and their children — even a little bit of control — wouldn’t you have questions for them? Maybe dozens of questions? 

Think about the questions you had when you were choosing a preschool, a music teacher, a coach, or a college. What may be at stake now is the way your children will live their lives for years to come. Think of the questions you’d want to ask about that, and think about how the candidates for president and vice president (this is crucial this time, given the ages of the presidential candidates) would answer. Could they show you a future your children and their children can thrive in? 

Bad or Worse?

Here is the reality. No one in their right mind would run for office. People do it for a lot of reasons, and too often for gain or power or other less than noble goals. Therefore our choices are not always great. But, frankly, I don’t care if I like a candidate as a person, that’s my emotions talking. I care if they will protect the future for my grandkids.

Bear the Pain

Last week I talked about following your own heart, and not doing things because they’ve always been done a certain way. And though you may think one vote won’t matter in your state, it will. And none of us have a right to complain if we are not voters. So stand in the rain, wait in line in the hot sun, do whatever it takes to make your voice heard. Don’t start thinking your vote doesn’t matter because you heard rumors, polls, or press reports. Vote anyway. And don’t let anyone stop you, intimidate you, or make you think bad things will happen if you vote one way or the other. And, when listening to others, ask yourself if they are the person you would take advice about for the future of your grandchildren.

Vote with thought behind it. Know what you’re voting for. Think about the future for your kids and grandkids even if you are young. Listen to your heart, but not your emotions alone. Ask critical questions. They will serve you well.

Eric Rhoads

PS: For 221 days we’ve been “on the air” for you (Facebook, YouTube, Instagram, and Twitter) at noon ET with me interviewing guest artists and at 3 p.. with art instruction videos. Join us. Go to any of those platforms and search my name or StreamlineArtVideo.

Last week’s Realism Live was the world’s largest virtual art conference. It was a huge hit. We had lots of fun, including bringing Bob Ross in for a visit from Heaven. You can see it here.

Now we’re launching the world’s largest watercolor conference with the best watercolor artists in the world. It takes place in January, but the price increases on Black Friday. Check it out at www.watercolorlive.com. We even have a Beginner’s Day.

The distant mountain of gray-blue contrasts against the white sky, which silhouettes the gnarled, twisted scrub oaks, looking like a movie set — as though an army of armored trolls is about to come in the scene. As I sit here, bright pinkish clouds begin to light up the horizon and illuminate the sky to the sound of angels singing.

Fields of little yellow flowers sprinkle the naturally weed-filled fields, and the beginnings of crunchy brown leaves are sprinkled in between. Signs of fall in Texas, a place where rich color is rarer than finding a diamond in a cave. 

On the old porch, red Adirondack chairs remind us of the place we spend our summers and mark our return here to Texas. Though we’re always sad to leave the Adirondack Mountains, the stunning fall color had ended and the ice was beginning to form on the lake, which is not a good thing when you have to get your food and supplies in by boat. For everything, there is a season, and we’re here to enjoy Texas again until late spring.

Living in Lockdown

Though life is grand, and it’s good to be home, I know many people who are struggling with the continued lockdown and its impact on their “normal” lives or incomes.

If you know me, you know I’ve been preaching about rewarding yourself with things that stimulate your creativity by doing things you love, avoiding the news and social media, and trying to “keep your head in the game.”

Misinformation

All the bad news, fear, misinformation, confusion, and vitriol are not good for our immune systems. We become what we mentally eat. And though the elections are entertaining, like a great football season, we can all get caught up in believing the world will end if our side does not win. Every election we hear “this is the most important election in history,” and the fear and worry become fever pitch, getting us all worked up. 

We have become emotional targets, manipulated by fear. If you can step back, step out of your fear or anger, and look at it from a distance, you can see exactly how we’re all being played. 

I don’t share my politics because I love my followers and don’t want to disrespect you by not respecting your opinions. I would never step out to share my thoughts — because I respect you, and I also don’t think it’s smart business. 

I’m NOT Running

About six years ago a major, well-known political operative approached me and inquired if I would run for the U.S. Senate. I thought about it for about 10 seconds before declining the offer out of respect for the quality of life I’m living and the need to be here for my family. And, frankly, I don’t want to make enemies. I want to love and be loved and would not be capable of launching a negative campaign against another. It’s not a game I want to play. I wouldn’t run for dogcatcher.

Great Entertainment

Over the next nine days, we’re all likely to be glued to our screens like we’re seeing a great cliffhanger in a movie. We’ll probably see more mudslinging than we’ve ever seen before. We might see unexpected things that rock our world and make us lose faith in humanity. We’re even likely to hear things about people we love and respect that will severely disappoint us. No, I have no inside information, I just know that there is a war on for your vote, and lots of missiles will be fired over the coming days. I’m guessing the unexpected will surprise us all.

A few thoughts to get you through the next nine days, and probably the months to follow, where sore losers will try every possible thing to change the outcome.

1. Stay in prayer. If you’re one who prays, remember to turn everything over to God. Pray for His will to be done in your life and in this country. This, more than anything else, gives me peace about all the craziness.
2. Be there for others. Everyone is worked up. Everyone needs a distraction. Everyone needs to know you care for them. You can be there without talking politics. But, with all that is going on in the world, suicide hotlines have seen huge increases in calls. People have fears about their future, and you can help them through it.
3. Boost your mental and physical immunity. Fear and worry destroy your immunity. You need to do things to increase your happiness. Do things daily that give you joy, that are fun, and that distract you from doom and gloom. Eat well, take your supplements, and get exercise. 
4. Keep your head down. If you’re in the middle of a political discussion, there are bullets flying over your head. Do you really want to be in the middle of that negativity? You cannot change anyone else’s mind, and they cannot change yours. Is this where you want to spend your energy?
5. The only things you can always control are your actions and your reactions. Voting is one thing you can control, and avoiding the negativity and the negative people is another. Change what you can control. 
6. Be the kind of person who lifts others up. We all know them and look forward to being around them. Don’t be the kind of person who is constantly firing bullets at others over politics. I’m so disappointed in the social media vitriol, which is why I’m trying to avoid it.
7. Think for yourself. I’ve come to know that I cannot trust ANYONE to have accurate information. I can’t trust any news source. I cannot trust social media. So you have to dig for your own facts, try to find multiple perspectives. Don’t just look for things that reinforce what you already want to believe. Seek balance.
8. Let go of “shoulds” — things we’ve told ourselves we should do. We all have preconceived ideas based on our past, our families, our parents, our friends. It’s always a good idea to ask yourself why. Why am I voting? Is it emotional, because I don’t like someone? Is it practical, because I want something accomplished? Or is it based on something I have always done, and changing makes me uncomfortable? Don’t listen to your friends, your family, the people you have always followed, but examine your own heart. Just because you’ve always voted a certain way does not mean it’s right for you today. Peer pressure is intense. But follow your heart, not what you or your family have always done in the past.

I want nothing but the best for you. I want you to have pure joy in your life and peace. I want your life to be what you want it to be. I want you to live your dreams. Everything we have in life comes from what we manifest, where we focus, and how we react and respond to the world. If you respond with love, peace, and with a smile on your face, your life will be filled with grace, which beats high blood pressure, anger, fear, and hate.

If nothing else, this is going to be a wild ride. Enjoy it.

Eric Rhoads

PS: This summer, after several days of back pain, I discovered a chiropractor, “Dr. Joe,” who was able to make my problems disappear. We hit it off on the first visit because he had just created his first paintings ever. I was able to give him some ideas and tips, and every time we met all summer, he would ask me for more ideas and tips on painting. The day before we left, I went in for a final tuneup, looked forward to next season, and said a fond farewell. He asked if he could contact me for painting advice through the year. Of course I said yes, and looked forward to coaching a beginner (I love teaching).

Little did I know it would be the last time I saw him. Three days later, Joe was dead. He had pulled the trigger on his own life for reasons I’ll never know. 

Though I had only known this young man (about 30) over six visits, I was really bothered by this news. Such a nice guy, such a talented chiropractor, such a promising painter. But the demons inside his head got the better of him, and though I don’t know what those demons were, someone has to be hurting deeply to want to take their own life. He had never shared hurt, but I’m wondering if I could have made a difference, helped him through his pain, shown him an alternative path, or offered him a new perspective. If only I had gotten to know him on a deeper level.

Then last week, an acquaintance, painter Greg LaRock, also a fairly young man, fell while rollerblading with his wife, and experienced head trauma that resulted in his death. Another brilliant candle snuffed out too early.

We all tend to be optimists when it comes to life. I think most of us plan to live long lives. We don’t expect an early passing from an accident, a disease, or even being so distraught that we end it ourselves. Yet life is fragile. The reality is that none of us know when our time will come. 

In each of these cases, my first reaction was that I wished I had known them better, on a deeper level. I wish I had taken the time and made more of an effort. It’s a reminder for us all to get to know people on a deeper level, seek to understand their needs, and step in to offer help if needed.

Live each day as if it were our last.

Last week I completed Fall Color Week, a week of painting fall color with friends. Then we completed Realism Live for a huge number of artists in 27 countries. And I just announced our January watercolor conference, Watercolor Live.

Halloween is just around the corner. Find a way to have some fun, even though it will be less than normal. We all can use a little more fun these days.

It could be a horror movie. Fog so dense I can barely see my hands in front of me. The cold air hitting the warm water has made the lake completely disappear. Gradually, as the sun peeks out, I can see a soft silhouette of trees, and then, as the fog burns off, the water becomes visible. Then some hint of color appears in the trees, until the fog has completely lifted. 

Years ago, on a morning like this, before I ever had kids, my dad would come and wake me to get out early in the boat to shoot photos of boats and camps in the mist. We would cover ourselves in layers of jackets, venture into the freezing air, and capture some of the best photographs ever.

One August morning I remember him waking us early to tell me we had six inches of snow overnight and we needed to get out and photograph it before it melted off. It was gone two hours later, but I got some of the best photos I ever took on that day.

Wake Up!!

Life as Rhoads kids had a lot to do with waking up early for an unplanned adventure. In summer of 1964, Dad came in and said, “We’re leaving on vacation in 30 minutes. Get packed.” He didn’t say where we were going, but we ate a quick breakfast, threw our bags into our old blue Oldsmobile, and a day or so later, we were at the 1964 World’s Fair in New York. I can still remember the moment we pulled up at the hotel. I had never seen a doorman before. And every moment and exhibit at the World’s Fair is as clear to me as it was on the days we spent there. My favorite things were the “Kodak Moment” signs showing you the best places to take shots of the exhibits, like the mid-century modern buildings (where I fell in love with architecture and design), the giant globe, the Space Park, the GM exhibit of future cars, the Bell Systems futuristic video phone, and the Westinghouse Time Capsule. 

It was also my first memory of falling in love with art, as we visited the Frick Museum and I saw a giant painting of sword-fighting pirates. That’s pretty cool to a 10-year-old.

Cooler Than Anything Ever

The World’s Fair was the coolest thing I had done in my little life at the time, and I still am amazed at the number of concepts seen there that have come true today. It expanded my mind about what was possible, and since that time I’ve wanted to be one of those people who invented cool stuff. I also wanted to be an architect because the designs at the fair and in New York were unlike anything I had ever seen. 

My fascination with cool things and innovation has lasted a lifetime, and the most important discovery I’ve made is that it’s rare that others can see your vision. In fact, they will mock you, laugh at you, and call you crazy. Then they will shoot you down and tell you all the reasons it’s a bad idea, all the reasons it will fail, and all the reasons no one will want it. The other discovery I’ve made is that you have to force your vision to happen in spite of all that. If it’s left up to others, even co-workers, big things may not happen.

What have you done to go against the tide lately?

Money Is Irrelevant

Greatness isn’t about becoming a billionaire. Becoming wealthy or a billionaire may be a byproduct of greatness, but it’s rarely done with the money in mind. Success follows ideas that change lives and make life better. Money sometimes follows. Sometimes not. But money is irrelevant.

What’s relevant is that you embrace and chase your wild dreams and that you never let anyone rain on your parade. 

The Stupidity of Fear

I can give you three examples of ideas I had 20 years before anyone that I did not pursue because people I respected told me what I was thinking defied physics and was not possible. If I had been willing to pursue them, and fight for a decade or two, I too would be a billionaire now. I have since learned to listen to my gut. 

I can also give you examples of great ideas I didn’t pursue but that others later came up with — that were complete failures. Yet in each case, I felt as though they were doing it wrong. Maybe my way would have succeeded?

Not Arrogance, Confidence

People often accuse people like Elon Musk or Thomas Edison of being arrogant, when in fact they are so driven by their vision that they become very sure of themselves. When you’re sure of yourself, you can take the football across the goal line no matter what obstacles are in the way. 

Defying Physics

We humans on this earth need to know that each of us possesses the skill to take anything impossible and make it possible, no matter our age, our circumstances, or our disadvantages. Meeting with a scientist one day, I was told that what I wanted to do defied physics — yet it was later done and proven possible. I’m not a scientist, I don’t “do” physics, but sometimes those of us on the outside can see ways to do things because we don’t know they can’t be done.

Yes, It’s Impossible. So What?

When I started my Internet radio company in San Francisco in 1999, a search firm lined up a couple of dozen interviews with top engineers. Each told me what I wanted to do was impossible. One told me it was impossible — but he would figure out a way. We did it, made history, and our tech is in use in every streaming broadcast in the world today. 

The limits you face are hiding out inside your head. I can remember discussions with an uncle who was brighter than all the engineers on earth. He had hundreds of brilliant ideas, yet when I asked him why he never pursued them, he told me there were other, more qualified people, and he was living what he was meant to be doing. His head was getting in the way of his changing the world. I’m not critical, he was doing what he wanted to do, yet I felt he could have changed the world in big ways with his ideas.

What We Need in School

There are no college, high school, or trade school courses teaching our students the most important principles of success. We should be teaching our kids that the impossible is almost always possible, that mindset impacts everything, and that the cards you were dealt do not have to be the cards you play. Yes, it’s hard work. Yes, it’s hard to face resistance, criticism, and ridicule. So what? I can think of harder things than that — like showing up every day for a job you hate.

Greatness has no limits. When these ideas come into your head, they should not be ignored. You’ve been selected to receive the idea, and it’s up to you, not anyone else, to follow up if you believe in its value to the world.

You’re Too Old

The other issue that gets in the way is this lame perception of age. I blossomed late, I’m better than I ever was, and I can do things today I could not pull off three or four decades ago. Do you think I’m going to let someone dictate to me that something isn’t possible because I’m well seasoned? No. The accumulation of experience over decades is just the thing to make you the right person. And the things most proven to contribute to longevity are an active brain, an active body, and an active social life. Why sit around wasting all those years of experience?

You’re Too Young

Youth is also a frequent excuse. “I’ll do it after college” is what I sometimes hear. Yet a young man I met had an idea in his high school science class for a technology to detect pancreatic cancer early, and has changed the world of medicine. He was 15, and is now on his way to being a billionaire before he’s 30. 

World-changing may not be about putting man on Mars. It might just be your role in the local art association, and applying your skills to help them reinvent. My friend Mary Longe, a former powerhouse PR and marketing executive, has made Plein Air Chicago a formidable organization. She’s working full time while retired, and loving it.

Ideas are a blessing. They are not for your entertainment; they are a combination of all your experiences, unique to you. Embrace them. You too can change the world.

Eric Rhoads

PS: One of the ways I want to change the world is by teaching a million people to paint. Since I set that goal, I’ve aggressively been driven to hit it so I can then make it bigger. The goal is meaningful to me because learning to paint was life-changing for me. It opened my eyes and my heart in new ways, and I want others to experience that level of joy. 

Because of COVID, I started going “on the air” daily at noon ET on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and YouTube Live, to help you and others keep their heads out of the disaster of the pandemic and, now, the other things shaking our way of life. I also started doing free video samples of the hundreds of videos we’ve produced (daily at 3 p.m. ET). We had already seen over a million views by day 22, and today is day number 186 without a day off. I don’t know if we’ve reached a million different people or if we’ve taught a million to paint, or if it’s lots of views by fewer people. Yet the goal remains important to me. 

When I was young I painted with my mom at the dining table at 5211 Indiana Avenue in Fort Wayne, Indiana. When I was 10, I was exposed to real painting. When I was 40, I decided I wanted to paint, but I had no self-confidence and I believed talent was required. Now I paint for fun, my work is in a gallery, and I continue to learn and grow. I’m living proof that you can learn to paint even if you think you can’t draw a stick figure, and I’m going to prove it to you. 

If you invest four days of your time, or even one day of your time, in my Realism Live online virtual art conference, where we have brought together the biggest artists in realism, you will be taking the leap and learning the important principles you may not learn at some rinky-dink art class. This is the real deal, and I guarantee it. If you attend one full day, and do not think you learned enough to get you moving in the right direction, I’ll refund 100% of your money.

This event will help you, it will help the artists we’re bringing in (artists are having trouble getting by right now), and it will help us. This event will help my business survive when all of our in-person events have been cancelled. And if it’s not right for you, let us know by the end of day one, and you get your money back. It’s a great offer because we have great confidence it can teach you the principles you need to get started. You can be new to art (Beginner’s Day suggested), or you could be wanting to take it up again, get to the next level, or get to the highest level. You’ll see top painters painting and drawing, giving instruction and tips, and you can watch replays again and again (especially if you can’t make the dates).

I would not say this just to make a sale … but this four days is life-changing. Take a few days off and pursue the dream of art. You’ll never regret it.

I was shy, I lacked confidence, and I didn’t believe in my ability to learn to paint. I was graced with a man by the name of Jack Jackson who convinced me to give him just one day, and if I liked that one day, come back for another. One day at a time. In one day, he changed my life. Today I operate an art-related publishing business that trains artists, informs and educates collectors, and teaches artists to sell their work. And best of all, I’m passionate about painting. It’s all because I took a small step and committed to one day. If you commit to my one-day beginners’ class, that’s the step you can take. If you want to add more later, you can. But one step, with a no-risk money-back guarantee — you have nothing to lose but one day. And you may gain a lifetime of painting. It’s life-changing. Sign up at RealismLive.com.

There are 95 days left in 2020, and you can take a disaster year and make it the best year of your life by signing up today. Don’t let anything get in the way of your happiness and joy. Nothing. 

Happy Yom Kippur to my Jewish friends. 

A quiet roar of leaves rattling through thousands of wilderness acres fills the distant air as the lapping water nudges the rocks on the shore by the barely moving lake. A nearby spring-born loon proudly calls out, knowing she is near ready to fly toward the Southern border within weeks as the brisk air turns to ice. A close gathering of loon relatives loudly encourages her as she flops and flutters a Sunday-morning experimental flight.

Glistening deep yellow sun reflects like dancing elves, sparkling and shimmering atop the surface of the water. Black lace; pine tree needles in silhouette frame the scene I love so dearly as I leave my warm little cabin to venture into the chilled air to visit the 140-year-old octagon-shaped porch on the lake. Filled with the sounds of beeping birds, fluttering squirrels, and the tapping little feet of field mice.

Yellow lupines and goldenrod spring up to signal fall as the dappled light makes the apples in the tree behind the kitchen glow orange. Deeply I breathe in the crisp fall air, knowing we’ll soon have to leave this unheated paradise once colder weather hits. I’m rolling the dice that I’ll see enough fall color saturate the mountain in leaves of red before we turn the key on our drive back to Texas.

Newfound Autumn

Fall, my favorite season, is something we’ve never experienced on this little Adirondack island, and barely experienced here in the past. Maybe once, before the kids started school. The call of the school year has always required our return to Austin, but now we’re staying on to experience the fall, along with our newfound roles as empty nesters who are not quite sure how to handle this newly discovered thing called silence.

Memories of my first visit to this million-acre protected park remind me that I was uneasy about coming to this place as our family sold our Lake Wawasee place in Indiana after three generations. I thought that was my favorite place, our summer escape. But rather than resting on tradition alone, my father, troubled by loud Jet Skis and racing boats and fumes of fuel, responded to the movie On Golden Pond, realizing there were still places that remained quiet, without the noise and pollution — much like Wawasee was when our family first settled there. I resisted the breaking of tradition. I didn’t want to leave there to come here, and I was determined not to like it. But by the end of a week here, I discovered something about this place, and about my own heart, that resulted in my never wanting to leave. Summers on this lake have blessed me since 1989.

Cozy, and Stuck

The lesson for me was that I was comfortable and resting on something that was good, but not as good as it once was, and for me never as good as when my great-grandfather fished that motorless lake. I was obstinate, unwilling to leave, determined not to accept the change made by my father — who was selling it hard because he knew we would fall in love as he had. In short, I was cozy and stuck in my ways.

Human nature prevails when comfort sets in. I’m reminded of a cartoon my late friend Courtney Thompson sent me decades ago: a picture of a general whose men are in battle with antiquated weapons. A man is there selling Gatling guns (early machine guns), and the general says, “I don’t have time to see a salesman. Can’t you see I’m in a battle?” The idea is that he was too preoccupied to look at something that would have given him an advantage and allowed him to end the battle much more quickly. 

We are a resistant bunch, we human beings. We get stuck. We do things because that’s the way they have always been done. That’s what we think, or believe, because it’s what our fathers and mothers believed, it’s what our grandparents, great-grandparents, and their forefathers believed. All too often we fail to think for ourselves. And if someone were to bring documented proof that what we believe is wrong, we’d still resist it. I’ve often wondered whether, if someone brought indisputable, documented proof that my biblical beliefs were untrue, I’d be able to shift the thinking I’ve spent my life believing.

Fragile Freedoms

This COVID-crazed time, this time of unrest and turmoil, this time of information and misinformation, censorship of social media, confusing and conflicting data that can bring distrust of any new information, has helped me realize how easily we comply with suggestions if they’re in the name of safety. This has helped me realize just how fragile our freedom can be. I’m finding my brain scrambling to understand what and who to believe anymore.

What about you?

The good news is that I’m forced to challenge my beliefs, I’m forced to explore other outlooks and opinions, and I no longer trust any of the voices I once relied upon. I can’t believe a single tweet or video that is stated as fact, and I can’t even trust the fact-checkers. It seems everyone has an agenda to sway me one way or another. 

I have to think for myself. 
I have to challenge everything I’ve believed in the past.
I have to accept that I might have been wrong, or that others I used to believe can no longer hold my trust.

There is a tectonic shift taking place in this world, right before our eyes.

Follow the Incentives

We can no longer sit in comfort and accept what is happening to us. We have to use the brains we’ve been given, and we have to ask “Why?” with every word we read. We have to follow the incentives, follow the money, follow the purpose of every word and statement thrown our way.

It’s uncomfortable, and I’d rather be comfortable, yet we cannot allow our comfort to blind us or we’ll never be comfortable again. 

I’m just guessing, but I feel as though things will be seen that we won’t want to believe. We’ll need to decipher, decode, and think for ourselves rather than rely on the comfortable past of our former selves, our family ways of doing things, and maybe even history itself.

Disruption Means Challenge

Like it or not, 2020 has disrupted us. Much like my father dragging us to a place we didn’t think we wanted to go, this disruption will make us challenge every thought and belief we’ve ever had. It’s frightening, but then again, change always is. Yet it’s change that improves life. It is discomfort that creates new levels of comfort, and hard times that make us stronger and better.

And … it’s a time when my faith is amplified as the only thing I can trust.

Embracing Rebirth

Every generation in the past has had something… the Great Depression, great wars and conflicts, plagues, civil unrest, and disease. We’re getting our chance to experience a special time in our lives, a time we will share with our grandkids, a time that will enter the history books. It may not be what we would choose, but we should embrace it for the ways we will be reborn.

Fear not. 

This may seem like a time to fear. It may seem that the things happening will never end, that life will never be good again, that things might get worse. I can’t trust in man, I can only trust in God, and trust that we’ve been given the ability to think and make decisions for ourselves for a reason.

Like Your Life Depends on It

This will pass, and life will be good again. But it will be different, which is why your willingness to think and ask yourself who and what you believe, is more important than ever. Think like your life depended on it. Use your own brain, be willing to consider differing opinions, be willing to ask yourself why something is true, why you should believe it, what needs to be seen that’s not clearly visible. Ask yourself if you’re stuck or blindly following the way things have always been.

Change what you can change. Speak up about what you see to help others — like me — see a new perspective. You may end up being the one voice they can trust. And know that a freight train of change, of obtuse ideas, of hard-to-believe truths may be put before you that could change something you’ve believed for your entire life. 

A Time for Questioning

This isn’t a time for comfort, it’s a time for critical thinking, for questioning everything we believe, for questioning everything others tell us and questioning who we trust to load our brains. It’s also not a time to seek reinforcement of what we already believe, but a time to deeply question ourselves and what we are clinging to from our past..

Answers always lie in our questions. 

Eric Rhoads

PS: For 179 days, no days off, I’ve been on social media at noon Eastern, with one single intention … to keep your head in the game. What that means is that I am trying to offer a distraction from the virus and the things causing us to fear. As they say on the airlines, put the oxygen mask on yourself before helping others. You and I cannot be there for our families and friends if our anxiety is at its peak, if our fear is consuming us, if our immune system is compromised by stress. My daily presence is designed to remind you to breathe, to do things for yourself, to do things that are fun, even though you may feel guilty about having fun. I want you to feed your soul, feed your mind, and feed your body with the good things that will keep you strong and balanced. 

I have to avoid the news, I have to avoid doom scrolling, and I have to avoid negative people on social media or in person. I don’t put my head in the sand, but I refuse to fill my brain with hours and hours of negativity. Stress is the number one cause of cancer, of heart disease, and of all disease. You have to protect yourself by getting exercise, eating great food, and avoiding things that depress you, meaning negative information and negative substances. That’s why I’ve opened the vaults and am giving you what I normally charge for each day at noon and three — to help others have a positive distraction, something that some find fun. And if we’re learning, growing, and having fun, we’re strengthening our ability to get through anything placed before us. And we will think more clearly because we’re exercising our brains to discover new things. I’m only offering art. That may not be for you, but find something your heart needs to fill your soul with joy.

In an effort not only to try to save my business, but to help others have a few days of complete escape and a flood of training, I’ve created some live virtual events to teach art to anyone who wants to learn. I’ve leveraged my lifetime of contacts to get the best of the best to teach drawing, painting, and various forms of art, including landscape, plein air, portrait, figure, still life, flowers, and more. It’s the first conference of its kind online, and we have already had about 1,200 people sign up from over 30 countries. It’s going to be monumental. Learn more about it at RealismLive.com.

If you like art and are curious, it’s not a lot of money. The last one I did, a woman attending said she got a four-year art education in five days. She said it was better than art school. Now I can’t make that claim, but you can find out for yourself (or forward this to friends you think might like to learn art). I do have a 100% satisfaction guarantee. If you attend, but don’t like it by the end of day one, let us know. We will refund 100% of your money, and you will have received day one for free.

Fall is in the air. The light is dim, as if winter is around the corner, and there is a warm cast to the distant wood, the result of the trees gradually beginning to rust. Soon our mountain will glow with red and the ferns will become alizarin crimson. Goldenrod plants and little orange flowers are budding everywhere. Though it’s still warm, I feel the need to put on a sweater, because it’s just that time of year here in the wilderness. We hope to stay as long as possible, until our heat-free cabin freezes us out. Then we will return to life as normal. If there is such a thing these days.

Nineteen years ago yesterday, I was due to be in the Twin Towers with my management team from RadioCentral, a company I had founded. You can read the account of my near-miss here (scroll down).

What fascinates me is the extended life I was granted.

Monumental Days

There are days we always remember, like the day John F. Kennedy died, the day a man walked on the moon, the day the Space Shuttle exploded in mid-air, and of course, September 11, 2001.

On that day, my pregnant wife and I watched in fear and angst, and wondered what kind of world our soon-to-be-born triplets would be living in. Now, today, we’ve just put the triplets in college and are living in a nest with no birds at home.

Clarity

When tragedy strikes and we are spared, we often think about what we want to do with this life that did not end when maybe it seemed it would. These moments bring clarity. And that clarity resulted in tens of thousands of people leaving New York City to live in a place where life could be more enjoyed and safety was more assured. And, today, 19 years later, a pandemic has made people think twice about their lives, their values, and where and how they spend their time. They say New York City has lost a half-million residents permanently — about the population of the entire city of Atlanta. It boggles the mind.

Often when we have these moments of clarity, we proclaim our intent to live our lives to the fullest. Then as life continues, days or weeks later, we get back to throwing away our time and not using what our second chance provided.

Have you ever had a second chance and swore you would make every day count?

The question I get most is, “How do you get so much done? How do you handle so many things?” Yet the thing I am continually asking myself is, “Why do I waste so much time?”

Though I’ve not done a personal time audit for years, I’d guess that three or more hours of my work time each day are not as productive as they could be. I’m always asking myself why I waste so much time.

How much time do you waste?

What Matters?

The value of these moments of clarity is that they help us refocus our attention on what really matters. After 9/11 I had to ask myself if I would have been satisfied with my accomplishments, had that been my last day on earth. 

And, during COVID-19, I’ve had to ask myself, did I get done what needs to be done? What if I’m the next person to catch the virus? Have I done enough?

Though I’d like to think those moments kick me in the behind and help me focus, we tend to lose that clarity as quickly as it comes. And I think we need constant reminders of what is important. What if I had one week, month, or year left? What is essential?

Have you stopped to ask what is essential for you?

If our time is filled with things that will never really matter, why do we do them? Well, clearly we have essentials that are urgent but not important in the grand scheme of things — paying the bills, keeping the grass mowed. 

But what are the three things you want to do most with the rest of your life? And how can you remember to focus on them more than anything else?

I don’t bring you answers … only questions. You’ll have to find the answers.

Life Extended

When my life was extended because my meetings in the World Trade Center were cancelled that day, I made a list of things I needed to get done that were important to me. I don’t even know where that list is, but it doesn’t matter. What matters is that we’re making that list on a regular basis, and finding a way to move those chess pieces on the board of life.

Big Purpose for Each of Us

We’re not made to be sedentary, to sit, to rot. We each have been blessed with something we can contribute to the earth. We’re not here only to buy big-screen TVs and pay cable bills. We each need to find that purpose and pursue it like it’s our final hour. Because one day, perhaps when we least expect it, it will be.

What are you here to contribute?

What is something that is special about you, something no one else can do? If you dig, it’s there. Some of us take years to find it, but you should never stop searching. You’ll know it when you find it, or it finds you. For me it was a life in art and applying my gifts for marketing and business to help thousands of artists live better lives. Before that, it was doing the same in radio. You see, it’s a moving target, ever-changing. 

I believe we get what we expect. If we expect greatness, it will find us. 

Ask yourself why: Why was I born? What was the purpose our Maker had in mind for just me? You’re not random, you’re here for a purpose, and each day needs to be focused on that purpose. Any day not focused is either rest, to give you energy to continue, or a misused day.

There is no limit placed on you by age, by birth, or by circumstances. You have a purpose. Pursue it and life will become enormously rich.

Eric Rhoads

PS: How can I be so arrogant, so full of myself, to believe that I can create the world’s largest art conference online? It was a question posed in a negative post on social media after I declared I wanted to do it. But it’s not arrogance at all. It’s belief in my mission to make artists stronger because it needs to be done, and someone needs to do it. Why not me? God has plans for us all. If he has selected you, he has the confidence that you’re the one to carry it out. As I said last week, still yourself, and listen.

I’ve been given the gift of life. Nineteen years since 9/11/2001. I am grateful for the gift I was given, the experience of becoming a dad and raising three wonderful souls. And grateful for the chance to serve you and others. I could have done more, and I intend to use my time to do a better job, and waste less valuable time and energy. Today, I’m reminded of just what a gift each day is. I’m grateful to you for this opportunity to share your inbox each Sunday.

Clanking is the sound I hear as the ropes hit the masts on the sailboats tied to the dock nearby, the swift breeze rocking them to and fro. The raging sound of an outboard motor zipping from across the lake carries as if right in front of me as a neighbor goes out to pick up the local paper, as he does every Sunday morning. There is no delivery when you live in a boat-access-only camp.

Puffy clouds filled with dark droplets waiting to pour out float sluggishly across the cloudscape sky. In the distance a slight hint of rust on some leaves hails an early indicator of fall.

Summer, as of this weekend, is officially over. It’s as though it just started, not only because time flies when you’re having fun, it flies when you’re tied down and staying home. 

The Year That Never Was

I find it almost impossible to believe we’re this far into the year that never was. The year that disappeared behind a mask. The year that forced us into lockdown, only to discover things about ourselves we otherwise would never have known.

As we put a bow on summer and set it to drift off into the glorious sunset of fall, I continue to ponder our world, the effects of world events, and the pandemic.

Years ago my grandfather told me a story of when he was a child. His ailing, bed-bound grandfather was lying in bed, talking to my grandfather and his cousin Clifford. “Boys, you need to get on your bicycles and go down the road to Mrs. Tompkins’ house. I think you’ll find her hunched over in her rocking chair on the porch, holding her baby. You need to go fetch that baby and bring it back here, because Mrs. Tompkins is dead.”

Of course, the boys thought that was ridiculous because he had no way of knowing that, yet to humor him, they rode down the road, only to find Mrs. Tompkins holding the baby, sitting in the rocker, dead.

The Voice of God?

I’d ask my grandfather if his grandfather had special powers of some sort, and he always said, “No, he was just always listening to God.” 

As I’ve thought about this over my life, I too have experienced it on occasion. One morning I had a dream, woke up, and called Lee, the morning DJ at the radio station I worked for. I said, “Lee, congratulations on the baby girl.” He said, “Eric, you must be dreaming. The baby isn’t due for three more months, and we know it’s a boy.” Then I told him my vivid dream that it had been born early, and said it seemed very real. We both laughed. Then five minutes later he called me and said, “Eric, how did you know? My wife, Sandy, was trying to reach me, but I was on the phone with you. She just had a baby girl.”

My wife always says things like, “I’ve got a feeling something bad is about to happen,” and her track record of intuition is often spot on. 

Learning to Listen

One of the benefits of the Pandemic of 2020 is that our lives are quieter now. I’m not one to believe in fortune-tellers or soothsayers, and even the Bible warns against that. But I do believe that we all have very high levels of intuition, and that we tend not to listen to it because we stay too busy.

When we’re not on a whirlwind roller coaster, when we’re not commuting two hours a day or rushing off here and there, we can hear the voices in our heads. Maybe, as my grandfather said, it’s the voice of God.

Better Days Ahead

I tend to be a contrarian, and I’m not a worrier. During this moment of civil unrest, COVID, and political battlegrounds, I’m not feeling worried. In fact, I feel as though it will lead us to a new place, a better place where our lives are more balanced, where our world is more balanced, and where the things that have plagued our lives for generations will no longer be problems.

I think people are implementing change in their own lives, and as a result will expect, perhaps demand, change in all aspects of life. 

Are you ready?

Time to Not Be Busy

Am I crazy? Maybe.

I want to encourage you to take this special day, this holiday weekend, and take some time to not be busy. Turn off the media, turn off social media, surround yourself with quiet. In Japan they call it “forest bathing.” I’ve been doing it for months, and avoiding social media and the news.

By doing this, taking two-hour walks in the deep forest, I’ve found I’m in touch with the voices in my head. Maybe it’s just wishful thinking. Maybe it’s more. 

I have no idea if these thoughts mean something new is really on the horizon, but that matters less. What matters more is that I’m experiencing quiet, and it is allowing me to think, to hear, to listen.

What about you?

No “Woo Woo” Here

I’m not a “woo woo” kind of guy, and if I had heard someone say what I just said, I’d be worried for them (and maybe ready to call the men in the white coats).

But I can say one thing for sure … We’ve all been too busy. Our lives have been crazy. We went from missing all the stimuli in the beginning to now wishing they don’t return, at least not at the level we once had them. COVID-19 has brought that blessing to the world, and I think the world is about to come together in a new way never seen in our lifetimes. This will begin a new era of change, which I think will change everything about what we accept, what we do, and how we do it. It’s almost as if we will flop 180 degrees from where we were.

Call me nuts. But stop, look, listen, and you may see things changing too. Though life has been good, it’s been too busy, too insane, and too overstimulated. Take a deep breath and pay close attention. And we may be ready to accept change, and things you would have never believed.

Eric Rhoads

P.S. The voices in my head told me that I needed to pivot and start online art conferences, and they have started to save my ailing business. The next one, Realism Live, is going to be huge. Already 1,200 are signed up, and there are two months to go. If you want to learn art or get better, take a peek.

Thoughts and prayers to those who suffered in the recent hurricanes and fires. What’s next? Locusts? But let’s stay positive. I’m there for you daily, 165 days in a row as of today. Catch me on Facebook Live and YouTube at noon Eastern daily. (Search Eric Rhoads or Streamline Art Video.)