I feel so blessed to stare out my window this morning and see the brilliance of color splashed on the trees in the back of the property, the distant gray-blue hills, and the twinkle of light kissing the slightly moving leaves. Sleepily I shuffle across the porch, hot coffee in hand, shoeless, and my ears are treated to the sounds of Sunday morning as I open the door. A distant lawnmower from a neighbor, the faraway harmony of a train horn, and the sounds of notes coming from tiny beaks.

But how do tiny beaks become big birds? How do we as mere mortals become mega-mortals, or giants? How does one become the top in one’s field? How do people become wealthy or highly accomplished?

There is no easy answer, but I can share some clues.

1. It starts with work ethic. No one I’ve ever met that at the top had it easy. Outworking everyone else is the starting point. You have to be willing to do everything, and work harder than anyone you know, and have the ability to sustain a high level of work for decades, even after your success begins.
2. Next on the list is passion, desire, and commitment. I never have believed that money is a driver for most people. Money is a byproduct. But if you are passionate and committed to something, you’ll work to make it happen and won’t get discouraged when things get difficult.
3. The biggest challenge in success is mindset. Your mindset controls everything — which can be positive or negative. Most of us have deep limitations in our beliefs about our ability or ideas. A good rule of thumb … if the idea seems impossible and scares you, that’s the idea you should pursue. If it does not seem impossible, it’s not big enough.
4. Next, embrace and overcome your fear, giving yourself the courage to go forward. You need to adopt the attitude that you’re going forward no matter how difficult.
5. Of course with work ethic, passion, commitment, mindset, and overcoming fear, you still have the problem of not knowing HOW to do it. You cannot succeed without capability. But where do you get it? I believe when the other things are aligned, you will do what it takes to learn what you need. We tend to rise to the occasion each time we need more capability.
6. The final step is confidence, which comes with the accomplishments you make. Confidence drives you to embrace fear, and keep stepping out to get beyond the next limitation.

I might go so far as to say that sometimes a little luck or a little timing comes into play, but most people make their luck and are ready to jump on opportunity because of their mindset, their willingness to overcome fear, and their courage.

The other thing is that, though it’s lonely at the top (true), we all need other people to help us succeed. It’s important to pick people who believe in your passion, people you can trust. And be sure to share your goals with others (though they may not dream as big as you).

Limitations do exist, but fewer than we think. And if you have courage, you look at roadblocks and ask yourself how to get over, under, or around them. Most limitations are fear-driven and self-imposed. Overcoming these kinds of limitations is the best predictor of success. In reality, in most cases you’re not too young, too old, too underprivileged, too sick, too poor. Motivation comes from desire to solve a problem like poverty or bad circumstances.

And if you think being privileged offers an advantage, it sometimes does, and sometimes does not. I know wealthy people who gave their kids opportunity, but the kids did nothing with it. Wealth isn’t a predictor. Passion is.

If you allow yourself to have big dreams, you can make them happen. I deeply believe this. My belief isn’t based on theory but from seeing it in action. You truly can dream the impossible dream.

Eric Rhoads

PS: Necessity is the mother of invention. Sometimes our plans don’t work out. When COVID hit, it slammed my business and we were on the edge of not surviving. But we had to face it head on, and do it fast, and that meant facing fear head on. It also meant reinvention. The good news is that so far, by doing online events, we’ve been able to get through it. Just this past week, ending last night, we wrapped up our four-day Realism Live event. Our next one, in January, will be Watercolor Live.

I’d like to thank the hundreds of people worldwide who joined us to learn, grow, and be part of the community of artists. I’m honored by your presence.

PPS: If you follow me on Facebook or Instagram  (please do) stay tuned for a new art challenge in honor of Thanksgiving. I’ll be announcing it soon!

Here is what’s going on at Streamline this week.

• The deadline to sign up for our next virtual online conference, Watercolor Live, and save up to $600 off your ticket is TOMORROW, November 15.
• Tuesday, November 16 is your last chance to get the new Kyle Buckland video, Courageous Color, at a pre-release discount! Don’t miss out before the price goes up.
• I’m always signing artists who are hot. In fact, we don’t sign anyone unless they are the best of the best, or if they are a hot up-and-comer. We’ll be releasing a new video from Kevin Macpherson soon, so keep an eye on your e-mail for that announcement.
• We’re all ready to be out and about freely, with our family of artists. If that’s you, I should mention that the Plein Air Convention will sell out fast (it’s already 50% sold) for next May in Santa Fe. And because of my daily broadcast, we will see more new people. But we have to limit it to 1,200 people, so I recommend not waiting. You can cancel any time without penalty.
• Be sure to watch my Art School Live show this week at noon Eastern by following Eric Rhoads, Publisher on Facebook

In the distance, as I sit on this old porch, I can hear the hum of a train whistle, a million miles away. It is barely audible, yet there is something so soothing about that sound. Somehow it brings me back to a better time, a time when I was a kid, and we would actually take locomotives to Chicago.

In fact, trains became a part of my life in many ways. We always had a train set around the Christmas tree (still do), and my best friend was a “railfan” who had his entire basement filled with a giant train town, with multiple tracks. We would put our puffy striped train hats on and play with his trains for hours. Once we had our driver’s licenses, we would drive to intersections at certain times to watch trains pass, and we would walk tracks just to be closer to the train world.

Clackity-Clack

One day, my friend Charlie called and said, “Let’s go, we’re going up to the train in Angola,” which was about an hour north of us. He had been part of a team that found an old train in Tennessee and managed to ship it to Indiana, restore it, and give rides. People would come from all over to ride the Little River Railroad. On this particular day, we had a mission. Being a self-taught musician, Charlie had determined that at a certain speed, each crosstie holding the track equaled a beat. So he calculated when the train would reach a certain speed, and at what spot. We then went to that spot and placed gun caps on the rails for about half a mile.

With a recorder down near the rails, we boarded the train, and when it reached that spot, the caps played a special beat loudly. The recordings were later used as a soundtrack on a song he had written. Charlie was a genius.

Another day we learned that the famous Norfolk and Western 611 had been restored and was coming through our area, so we greeted it among hundreds of other railfans, and then rode it, windows down and with soot in our eyes.

A Name with Meaning

When I founded my company, I needed a name. I loved trains, loved design, and at the time was an art deco collector. The Streamliner, a sleek, shiny silver art deco train, had been designed by the great designer Raymond Loewy. So I named the company Streamline, because it represented what I wanted the company to be … streamlined and efficient, yet focused on beautiful design. Ever since then I’ve tried to live by those standards, to do things efficiently and to find ways to stand out with beautiful design in my magazines and products.

Losing Someone Important

Charlie was my best friend. We hung out for countless hours, never running out of things to talk about. We both loved radio (he actually got me my first radio job and trained me). We loved music and audio and well-done advertising. Of course, we loved trains. Though I was never the rabid nerd he was, I liked them because I liked being with him.

Sadly, Charlie died young, and I’ve had to spend the last couple of decades without him. To this day, I find myself thinking of Charlie when I see something he would have loved.

Obscure Obsessions

When I think about my friendship, which began when we were about 15 or 16, I realize that what I loved about him was that he was not obsessed with the things others obsessed about. He did not care about money, ever. He was an incredible writer and musician, writing hundreds of songs, yet he never cared about being famous. He would entertain with friends at various local venues, but he never took a shot at recognition outside of our small town. My buddy John and I were talking about him recently and realized he would have been internationally famous if he had just taken his shot. But that was not important to him, which is why we all loved him. He was driven by his art and never allowed other standards to influence who he became.

Living His Own Terms

This week, I lost another good friend, Ralph, who was my dad’s age. Ralph was very similar to Charlie, walking to his own beat, loving his art. The big difference is that Ralph took his shot and became a wealthy man. And though he ended up with the big mansions, he was never one to lord it over people about his wealth. To him, it was simply a tool to do more. Still, he did what he wanted, on his own terms, and was not trying to be what others wanted him to be.

I look at these two mentors and realize they helped shape who I am. Though they both put their families first, they both pursued what they loved with passion. They never cared what others thought. They did not follow the path we all think we’re supposed to follow.

It’s so easy to lose sight of who we really are because the world is always telling us what we should be. We’re all too often seduced by shiny objects.

What if you and I were truly ourselves at all times?

How would we change the way we live?

In the early days, I spent a lot of time trying to turn my friend Charlie into what I wanted for him. I could see his talent, so I wanted him to take a shot, because that’s what I would have done. Yet he was strong, he resisted, because it was not what was important to him.

The Richest Man I Knew

As our friendship grew, I realized that in his life of poverty, he was one of the richest people I knew. And it took me a lot of years to understand that wealth isn’t about objects, it’s about the jewels we acquire from our families, our deep friendships, and doing what we love.

What are the jewels in your life?

Who are the jewels that you would miss if they were lost?

What do you want to be doing that you’re passionate about, but are not doing?

What are the things you are doing that you don’t want to be doing?

Finding Your Jewels

I have a lot of regrets because when living in different cities, I did not spend enough time with my jewel of a friend. I got busy with my career and failed to get on the phone with him enough or visit enough. Then, suddenly, he was gone. Thankfully, I visited him before he died, took him to chemo treatments, but what I found amazing is that each day, he was having fun, laughing, and doing the things he loved. He did not change a thing, because he was already living well, and continued doing so.

Too many others have a wakeup call and suddenly, when they learn their time is up, start trying to catch up and do what they love.Do it now.

Don’t wait another moment.

Don’t burn time on meaningless things.

This week alone I lost two good friends, each I’d not spoken to or visited, yet wish I had. And in today’s uncertain world, you, me, or the jewels in our lives could be gone instantly.

This fall, at my Fall Color Week artist retreat, I realized how important each of these people had become to me, and I made a point to spend more time enjoying their company, knowing that the uncertainty of the world might mean it would be our last time together. The result was that my experience was richer and deeper.

Who do you need to see or talk to more?

What do you need to do that will bring you more joy than anything else?

What’s getting in your way?

Obsess about things that matter.

Eric Rhoads

P.S. I fell back. Did you? Don’t forget to change your clocks.

On Wednesday, I hold the 1 Day Atelier, my Beginner’s Day for Realism Live, my virtual art conference. Hundreds are attending. It is a great way to learn how to draw or paint, and learn lots of different subjects. If you’ve always felt you had some hidden talent and don’t know how to tap it, or if you feel you have no talent but wish you had some, come with me and I’ll make sure you learn the important first steps to becoming an artist. I even guarantee it. And then, if you want, attend the other three days. You’ll find it all here.

Here is what’s going on at Streamline this week.

• This Monday, November 8, is the last day to get the pre-release price on the new Camille Przewodek video, A Colorist’s Guide to Painting. As you know, I studied with Camille, and she changed my life when it came to understanding color.
• Wednesday, November 10 is the last day to vote for your favorite painting for the PleinAir Salon’s October People’s Choice Award. You can vote for your favorites HERE.
• Speaking of Realism Live, there’s $444 in bonus gifts if you get signed up by TONIGHT. Oh, and I do an “If You Don’t Love the First Day, You Don’t Pay” Guarantee. The lineup is amazing, including Quang Ho, Jacob Collins, Mary Whyte, Graydon Parrish, and dozens of others. The event starts on Wednesday with Beginner’s Day and then the main event on Thursday.
• The deadline to sign up for our next virtual online conference, Watercolor Live, and save up to $600 off your ticket is November 15.
• I’m always signing artists who are hot. In fact, we don’t sign anyone unless they are the best of the best, or if they are a hot up-and-comer. We’ll be releasing a new video from Kyle Buckland soon, so keep an eye on your e-mail for that announcement.
• We’re all ready to be out and about freely, with our family of artists. If that’s you, I should mention that the Plein Air Convention will sell out fast (it’s already 50% sold) for next May in Santa Fe. And because of my daily broadcast, we will see more new people. But we have to limit it to 1,200 people, so I recommend not waiting. You can cancel any time without penalty, but if you don’t have a seat, you’ll miss out on our 10-year anniversary of the event, and by now, you know we do special things on special events.
• Be sure to watch my Art School Live show this week at noon Eastern by following Eric Rhoads, Publisher on Facebook. Guests include _____ (if we don’t have any, eliminate the guests part) .
• Please follow me on Instagram @ericrhoads

Cool breezes and the sounds of distant birds flow through my open windows as I awaken, looking out the window at the orange sun splashing the twisted oaks. Late October here is what I always refer to as “California Weather,” meaning darned near perfect. Early Sunday mornings are a gift, as few are on the roads and the quiet is refreshing. All I hear is the sputter of a small airplane overhead.

I love airplanes. I suppose it goes back to when I was a small child. My mom would take us to Baer Field to watch airplanes land or take off, usually when my dad was traveling. We always went to the airport to see him off.

Dad became a pilot at 14 and would take us kids to airports to hang out with his pilot friends, so I have a special feeling when I go to small airports.

Up in the Sky All Alone

Following in my dad’s footsteps, I learned to fly and did my first solos at age 19, but I had a mild mishap on landing one time. I was coming in for a landing when the wind shifted direction by 180 degrees and started forcing me down. My instinct was to push on the gas to get back up in the air, but on that airplane, pushing in meant reducing the gas, so I killed the engine 40 feet in the air and experienced a hard landing and cracked the leg of the airplane. I don’t think I’ve ever been so scared.

My Crash

As soon as I landed, the instructor ran out to the aircraft, got me out, put me in another airplane, and sent me back up. I guess that’s what they call “getting back on the horse” when you get bucked off. I can remember being 5,000 feet above the ground, by myself, thinking, “What am I doing here? I have no business being up here.” So the next landing was my last as a pilot.

Rainy Day Painting

A couple of weeks ago, during Fall Color Week, me and a couple of friends were looking for a place to paint, but it was raining pretty hard that afternoon. I spotted the Lake Placid Airport, so we arranged to paint under the overhang of the hangar, looking out at a stunningly beautiful scene.

Flying the Fall Color

While we were there, a plane took people up for a scenic flight of the fall color, and next thing you know, one of my fellow painters had booked us on a flight for the following day. I got to sit in the front, and we flew the mountain ranges, flew over our lake house, and even saw a moose from the air. It was a special day, and it made me regret that I never really got back on the horse to get my license and fly. I then reminded myself that it’s never too late.

The reason that instructor wanted me back in the airplane was to prevent me from getting scared and giving up. The mistake I made was not returning again and again, and the mistake he made was not talking me down from my fear and helping me gain the confidence I needed. I had allowed fear to get in the way of my success.

Though I’m not one to look back, I can’t help but think about how much fun I missed out on because I gave in to my fear.

What horse did you not get back on?

Fear of failure is a powerful emotion, and one that prevents us from living as fully and beautifully as we could. 

Do we want to be on our deathbed, looking over our life and saying, “If only I had tried a little harder. If only I had tried at all”?

My son told me the other day that he wants to be rich and famous, wants to be an actor. I said, “Terrific, what are you doing about it?” His answer was, “Dad, it’s hard.” My answer was that “everything’s hard, but people overcome hard things every day.”

If we focus on why something is important to us, the why often overcomes the how. In reality, everything worth doing is hard. Pursuing dreams is hard. 

Since when is something being hard a reason not to pursue it?

Showing up here every Sunday is hard. Doing my daily Art School Life Facebook show is hard. Running my business and dealing with my team members is hard. Being a dad of triplets is hard. But the rewards overcome the difficulty.

Ask yourself about your own unrealized dreams.

Why were they unrealized?

Maybe you told yourself they were too hard. Maybe you tried once or twice and failed and stopped trying. Maybe your interests and passions changed, or maybe you told yourself they changed. That’s what I did with flying. I told myself, “It’s not all that important to me,” and I told myself I was really doing it for my father, not myself. But if I’m honest with myself, that’s not true.

What dreams would you still like to make happen?

What’s in your way?

What are you telling yourself are the reasons you can’t do it?
Are they real?

I started to tell myself that I’m probably too old to get my pilot’s license. But I doubt that’s true.

And I’ve come up with a dozen other excuses. But if it’s really important enough to me, I need to do it.

What about you?
What do you need to do?

Most limitations and excuses are not real. They are simply sharks swimming around inside your head. 

Don’t let the negative thoughts and excuses win.

Don’t spend the rest of your life in regret.

Don’t allow fear to own you.

Instead, realize that if you’re breathing, there is a way. And though you may have to alter the dream to fit your current circumstances, dreams are meant to be lived.

Get back on that horse.

Go, now, and live your dream.

Eric Rhoads

PS: Happy Halloween! I’ll be out tonight, costume on, begging for candy. Maybe someone will mistake me for a large overgrown kid pretending to be an ancient being from another time 🙂

I thought it would be nice to bring you up to date on my world and all the things we’re working on. 

• I’m doing a PAPIPA … Paint a Pumpkin in Plein Air challenge online. Paint a pumpkin from life  … any style, carved or not, and post it on your social media with the hashtag #PAPIPA and tag @EricRhoads. The winner will get a full ticket to our REALISM LIVE online virtual conference, which is coming up a week from Wednesday. The second and third runners-up will get their choice of any video we’ve produced at Streamline.Art.
• Last week we released a new video by Mary Garrish, called The 6 Elements of Design. She is very impressive and a great landscape teacher. She’s simplified things to six elements, and it really makes painting easier to understand.
• TODAY (October 31) is the last day to enter your paintings into the monthly PleinAir Salon. You can win $15,000 and the cover of PleinAir Magazine, and there are $33,000 in annual prizes. Our esteemed Judge is Patricia Terwilliger, co-owner of Jones & Terwilliger Gallery.
• This Tuesday, November 1, Is the last day to get the pre-release price on the new Camille Przewodek video, A Colorist’s Guide to Painting. As you know, I studied with Camille, and she changed my life when it came to understanding color.
• Speaking of Realism Live, there’s $750 in bonus gifts if you get signed up by November 7. Oh, and I do an “If You Don’t Love the First Day, You Don’t Pay Guarantee.” The lineup is amazing, including Quang Ho, Jacob Collins, and dozens of others.
• I’m always signing artists who are hot. In fact, we don’t sign anyone unless they are the best of the best, or if they are a hot up-and-comer. This upcoming weekend we’ll be releasing a new video from Kyle Buckland. Keep an eye out for that.

Have a great Halloween.

As I sit on the red cushions of the old wicker couch on this long Texas porch, the heat of the cushions feels great on my travel-weary back. My sleepy eyes are squinting at the intensity of the morning light, which is casting a yellow glow on the side of my art studio in the back of the property. The dogs keep jumping up on my lap, then leaping off to chase squirrels. I’m happy to be home after four months away in the Adirondacks.

Life of Regret

Recently I had a discussion with a friend who has lived a life of regret. In fact, he was sad and pathetic because every time we meet, he tells me about all the things he could have done but was too afraid to do. He was tremendously talented, but his fear of failure destroyed his life. Instead of using his amazing talents in Hollywood, he locked himself in his house for 30 years after he did not get a job he felt he deserved.

Stuck in the Mud

We all have experiences we regret, and many of us struggle with clinical depression, but every time I talked with my friend over many years, he brought up the job he almost got, and then told me all the reasons he did not really deserve to get it. He was stuck in his own mud.

What if he had tried one more time, or two more, or 20 more? What’s the worst that could have happened? Instead, he stopped trying.

How Do You Define Success?

We all define success differently. Some want jets and mansions, others want a great family, others want adventure. Yet to gain the success we want, we have to overcome fear.

I was afraid to ask out the most smart and beautiful woman I ever saw. But I eventually overcame my fear and ended up married to an amazing woman who gave us three wonderful kids. What if I had never overcome my fear?

Success is defined by your willingness to step out in spite of your fear in order to accomplish your dreams.

I’ve met some of the wealthiest and most successful people in the world, including presidents, vice presidents, billionaires, astronauts, sports heroes, and people who run giant industries, celebrities in film, TV, radio, and music.

Funny thing .. they are just regular people in every way. Some I’ve met did not even seem all that smart. But the one thing they all have in common is that they don’t let the fear control or stop them. They persist in spite of their fear, in spite of their failure.

What if I fail?

So what?

What if I look bad?

So what?

What if I lose everything?

So what?

Success in life, in work, in career, hobbies, and family is always about overcoming fear. We fear working harder, we fear failure, we fear ridicule, and we fear rejection.

What do you fear?

What could you do if you had no fear?

In what ways is fear controlling or preventing you?

Though there are many habits and abilities that impact success, fear is the one that holds us back most.

Have the courage to look fear in the face and say, “YOU DON’T CONTROL ME.”

You can do this. I know you can.

No matter your stage in life, old or youthful, you don’t want to look back at what you did not try because of your fear.

People who change the world have fear. But they step out anyway.

When will you overcome your fear? When you do, you’ll have newfound freedom, and greatness will emerge.

Eric Rhoads

PS: Happy Halloween! I’ll be out tonight, costume on, begging for candy. Maybe someone will mistake me for a large overgrown kid pretending to be an ancient being from another time 🙂

I thought it would be nice to bring you up to date on my world and all the things we’re working on. 

• I’m doing a PAPIPA … Paint a Pumpkin in Plein Air challenge online. Paint a pumpkin from life  … any style, carved or not, and post it on your social media with the hashtag #PAPIPA and tag @EricRhoads. The winner will get a full ticket to our REALISM LIVE online virtual conference, which is coming up a week from Wednesday. The second and third runners-up will get their choice of any video we’ve produced at Streamline.Art.
• Last week we released a new video by Mary Garrish, called The 6 Elements of Design. She is very impressive and a great landscape teacher. She’s simplified things to six elements, and it really makes painting easier to understand.
• TODAY (October 31) is the last day to enter your paintings into the monthly PleinAir Salon. You can win $15,000 and the cover of PleinAir Magazine, and there are $33,000 in annual prizes. Our esteemed Judge is Patricia Terwilliger, co-owner of Jones & Terwilliger Gallery.
• This Tuesday, November 1, Is the last day to get the pre-release price on the new Camille Przewodek video, A Colorist’s Guide to Painting. As you know, I studied with Camille, and she changed my life when it came to understanding color.
• Speaking of Realism Live, there’s $750 in bonus gifts if you get signed up by November 7. Oh, and I do an “If You Don’t Love the First Day, You Don’t Pay Guarantee.” The lineup is amazing, including Quang Ho, Jacob Collins, and dozens of others.
• I’m always signing artists who are hot. In fact, we don’t sign anyone unless they are the best of the best, or if they are a hot up-and-comer. This upcoming weekend we’ll be releasing a new video from Kyle Buckland. Keep an eye out for that.

Have a great Halloween.

One of the most devastating moments of my life was when my grandparents’ house was sold. If I’d had the money at the time, I would have bought it to keep it in the family. But of course, with time and perspective, keeping the house would have served no purpose; it was not needed and it might even have become a burden, dealing with renters, or with repairs if left empty. Clinging to the house was purely wanting to cling to the memories of times in the house with my grandparents.

On My Knees

About 11 years ago, my dad announced to us that he was going to be selling his lake home. I had fallen in love with the lake and tried to spend all summer there when possible. My kids have spent every summer of their lives in that house. Therefore it was my hope to keep the house in the family for generations to come. I can remember even praying that I could make enough money and find a way to keep it so he did not have to sell. But he was never really very serious about selling it, or he would have put a price on it that would have sold. In reality, he would only have sold it if he got a super-high price, and I did not have the financial ability to buy it. Reasonable offers were turned down, and the house never did sell. But three summers ago, my family let go, deciding to build our own life in our own place on a nearby lake.

New Owners

After my dad passed this spring, my family unanimously decided to stay in our own lake home instead of moving back into his, so we put his home up for auction and spent several weeks making the house ready to show. We did some painting and repairs and added a lot of new appliances (my wife did most of the work because I still work full days). Two weeks ago, my dad’s house was sold, and this coming week, the sale will close and it will become the home of the new owners. And, other than the two weeks of cleaning attics, garages, and going through 30-plus years of stuff, we’re ready to say farewell.

Being a Cling-On

The lesson for me is that clinging to something just because of memories is not always the best solution. Though filled with memories of family events and summers with family members present, it’s not the house that made it a home, it was the presence of my dad and his positive spirit. Today, it’s an empty shell awaiting a new family and their own memories. 

What about you? What are you clinging to that isn’t serving you well?

You Might Need It Someday

My dad, being a Depression-era child, never threw anything out. In the last two weeks I’ve touched every single paper, every box, every item inside his home, most of which he had not touched or seen in 30 years. How did that serve him? I daresay it caused more stress, knowing that someday he or someone else would have to deal with it. I think we filled up 32 dumpsters, and that doesn’t include everything removed to be put up for auction. Though I’m happy to serve my dad and my brothers, it would have been nicer if he had dealt with those things years earlier. And it’s a reminder that I’ve done the same thing. I still have my saxophone from high school and a garage full of memories I never see. Why?

The last thing I wanted to do this spring and summer was clean out houses, storage units, attics, and closets. Because of deadlines, I was forced to deal with it. Unlike my packed garage at home where I’ve not been forced to deal with it, and I dread ever having to move. It causes stress, and it’s something I need to carve out the time to deal with. 

What are you not dealing with?

What things cause you stress, knowing they are looming?

How would you feel if you got those things off your plate this month?

As we enter the fourth quarter, let’s use it for cleansing our minds of the clutter we’re clinging to so we can enter 2022 with a clean slate. 

Eric Rhoads

PS: Speaking of 2022, this week I had my executive team up to the lake for a few days of planning 2022. We’re not waiting till the last minute, we’re making a plan now. Creating strategy, dreaming, budgeting, and trying to think ahead so we’re ready to hit the ground running in the new year. It may be something you should be considering now too.

I was due to leave for Russia next week, for two weeks of touring and painting, but sadly, I postponed the trip because of the state of the world at the moment. I had to disappoint a lot of people, and of course I’ll lose the income. But since I was going to be away, I’ve decided to take those two weeks off to recover from a summer of cleaning out closets and attics and the stress of getting the house ready. If I’m here next week, it will probably be a “best of,” and I’ll also be skipping my noon daily broadcasts. Thanks for your patience.

I should mention that we have signed some giant names to our Realism Live virtual conference, and we’ve seen a massive number of people sign up in the last two weeks. It promises to be spectacular for you and your artwork. I hope you’ll consider it.

Once vacation is over, I’ll be at my Fall Color Week painters’ retreat here in the Adirondacks. There is still room for you. Come paint with us.

Happy Labor Day!!

My eyes opened this morning to a new scene — at least, new since June. Twisted oaks, high grasses, all being baked in the hot Texas sun, unlike the most squishy moss-covered grass in the Adirondacks. My tender toes burn as I hit the deck outside and hop rapidly to my old brown wicker couch. A bead of sweat hits my forehead and rolls down my nose like a rogue rollercoaster. I’m simply not used to summer in Texas. The cool Adirondacks have spoiled me. 

I came here to host my Pastel Live conference, which ended last night, and today, as soon as we can get on the road, I’ll drive my daughter to her second year of college and the first “in-person” year she will have. Laurie and I thought we were empty-nesters last fall when school began, but alas, Zoom classes are easier from home than from a 10” x 10” cinder block dorm room, and the food is better. I’ll return to the Adirondacks for summer and fall tomorrow and we’ll try this empty nest thing one more time.

Tragedy

Between segments at my event, I’ve been glued to my screens, watching in horror as we all see a helpless situation we cannot control. I’m so used to being able to control things or help in some way, yet I’ve been racking my brain with no solutions.

But I ask myself, what if I were there? What if I were in that situation? What would I do?

How would I protect my family?

How would I escape? 

I also ask myself, could that happen here?

What Would You Do?

Growing up Rhoads, my dad would always ask us questions like that. What would you do? He trained us for contingencies and always told us the unexpected often happens, and things you don’t think can happen, do happen.

Do or Die

I can remember talking to my father-in-law, who was a German soldier in WWII, who told me that the atrocities that happened surprised them all because, as he said, things like that don’t happen here. Suddenly he found himself forced to be in an army that supported things he did not support, things he did not want to be a part of. And he watched men in his line who were insubordinate be shot on the spot. He could not believe his eyes.

Those living in the Land of the Free have not seen a war on our soil since the Civil War. We’ve been blessed. But just because it has never occurred will not prevent it from happening. Which is why I have to ask my preparation questions. What would I do if..?

Though I usually preach positive thinking, some will say my contingency thinking is negative. Perhaps, but it’s better to have some ideas, some plans as a backup.

Watching the news, we’re seeing disaster because they underestimated the situation and did not have enough contingency plans.

What about you?

Contingencies relate to every part of your life. What would you do…

• If you lost your job?
• If the banks crashed and there was no access to your money, and ATMs did not work?
• If there were unexpected food shortages or stores were closed?
• If the power went out for a couple of months?
• If city water plants were shut down for a month?
• If there was no cell phone service for days, weeks, or months?
• If the Internet no longer existed?
• If GPS stopped working?
• If another country attacked our homeland?
• What if my house burned? 
• What if someone broke in while we were sleeping?
• What if my house flooded?

As I ponder these things, I wonder if I could even drive somewhere to get away. I have not had a paper map in a decade, and I would not be able to access the addresses of my friends and family because my phone has died, Google doesn’t work, and online maps are no longer available.

My kids have probably never had a map in their hands. 

Am I telling you this because I’m expecting something? Absolutely not. But history tells us that the unexpected happens and that sane people can become crazy fast.

Blown Away

And contingencies don’t have to be about the things mentioned; they can relate to anything in your life. Let me give you an example. One year, when I was living in Florida, I got stuck in the middle of a hurricane on the turnpike. It was a dangerous and scary situation. I thought I was going to die. So after I survived, I told myself, “Never again.” When future hurricanes were coming, I’d leave town two days before everyone else did. Sometimes they hit and I escaped, sometimes they missed and I had a nice weekend in a hotel somewhere. For those of you in New York and Boston and along the East Coast, there is a storm that might be headed your way. Are you ready? Have you thought about the contingencies?

I recall a storm that knocked power and water out for three weeks. You could survive with a contingency plan.

Last year during “Snownado” in Texas, we were snowed into an area that had no plows, no power, no water. In hindsight, we saw it coming on radar. We should have taken a vacation to Florida.

The last thing you want to do is have an unexpected disaster and to do what everyone else does. By thinking of every possible solution years in advance, you’ll know exactly what to do the second it happens while others are trying to figure out solutions.

As a parent, I feel an obligation to play out scenarios in my mind. I may never tell my kids about them, but in some cases I’ll be ready, have solutions, and be prepared. In other situations, I’ll be blindsided.

More Than One Solution

In any case, it’s worth a discussion. What are five things you could do if any of those situations actually happened? The worst thing you can do is say, “That will never happen,” because when you say it, BOOM, it will happen!

Cognitive Dissonance

Most will stare with their jaws dropped in disbelief, which is valuable time lost. There are stories of people who predicted the Holocaust and were mocked as crazy conspiracy theorists, but they escaped and survived. The rest had cognitive dissonance. They just refused to believe this would ever happen among people they trusted. 

Rumors and Clues

My dad once told me of meeting a cab driver who had been a wealthy farmer in a country where they were hearing rumors that farms would be taken over. She urged her husband to take a family vacation, just in case. He told her she was nuts: “It won’t happen here.” They took out the cash they could, took a vacation to another country, and while they were gone all the farmers, including their friends, were killed. They had to survive on their vacation money until they could get jobs. They were the lucky ones who paid attention to the clues because, as my dad said, “There are always clues.” He once said, “Always consider that the opposite of what you’re being told will happen. What then?”

Am I trying to scare you? Of course not. But I care, and I want the best for you, and if you think things through, this little note could save your life someday. Of course, I hope it never comes to that, but being prepared is never a bad idea. 

Eric Rhoads

PS: Speaking of being prepared, hundreds and hundreds of people are now prepared to do pastel painting because of our online Pastel Live conference, which we just completed. The next one is Realism Live, which will prepare you for all kinds of painting. Check it out.

My Fall Color Week artist retreat is going to happen in late September in the Adirondacks. It will be a week of fun, painting, and meeting new friends, no matter what level of painter you are. Come join us.

Also join us on our Fine Art Trip to Germany and Austria this fall, and my Russian Painting Trip in September. At the moment, it looks like both will happen.

Tossing and turning from the sweltering heat and the bright sun blasting a furnace of light through the windows, I hop out of my otherwise coży bed, make my way to the coffeemaker in the kitchen, and head to the dock to sip my wakeup juice. Alas, it’s so hot, I slip my bare legs into the water to cool the lower half of my body. When I’m done writing this (assuming I don’t drop my tablet into the drink), I’ll take a swim.

Though this has been the rainiest I can remember in three decades of summer life in the Adirondacks, the few warm summer days have been glorious and made up for the rain. Spare time has found me flat-out on the dock absorbing the sun’s rays, painting in my little wooden electric boat (though never enough), and sitting with a few visiting friends. And like all summers, all good things will come to an end. 

This week I’ll slip away, head to Austin to host my newest online art conference, and then make my way back for a few more glorious weeks. When I return my kids will be off to college, though they are understandably anxious because of the uncertainty in the world.

What about you?

Are you finding yourself anxious about the uncertainty of the world? 

Is fear entering your mind more than ever?

Yeah, me too. 

A wise man (my dad) once told me years ago a trick he used when he could not sleep because of worry.

“Get up, write down everything you find yourself worrying about, and then go through the list. Is there anything I can change tonight at 2 a.m.? If not, tell yourself you can’t impact it tonight, and that you need rest to deal with the issues well during daylight.”

I have used this for years and it’s very effective.

But what about worry in the daytime?

I find myself dealing with worry or anxiety by asking myself these questions…

What’s the worst that can happen?

Is there anything I can do to change the outcome, and if so, what specifically can I do?

Sometimes asking ourselves simple questions gives us very clear answers.

The worst that can happen is that I’ll die and my family will have to get along without me.

What can I do about that?

In that case my anxiety stems from being ready to die. Though we are never ready, for me it’s about my faith and my belief that I’m ready from that perspective. And, as far as my family goes, I have to make sure I’ve got my affairs in order, my will written or updated, and hopefully enough savings or investments or insurance to get my wife and kids through it.

Knowing these things are handled would give me great peace of mind. The things unsettled give me anxiety, and motivation to get them done so the anxiety stops. 

What about you?

What’s the worst that can happen?

What do you need to do to make sure you are prepared for the worst?

What things remain that are causing anxiety?

The other thing I have to ask myself is, what can I change? 

Can I change the pandemic or the government response? In my case, no. So rather than getting worked up about it, I ask myself, what can I change related to that issue? Then I need to do those things.

The simple act of these questions, changing what I can, and stopping stressing about what I cannot change, has given me tremendous peace. Therefore these things don’t bug me like they bug others.

Make Up Your Mind!

Mindset also plays a critical role. I’ve told myself I refuse to allow this to ruin my life, my relationships, or my mental or physical health.

Would I regret spending the last year of my life in a twisted, worried anxiety state? Would I rather be calm and living the highest quality I can under the circumstances?

Being Mentally Ready

My gut tells me things are going to get worse before they get better. My instincts tell me that with all the things going on in the world (fires, floods, protests, riots, etc.) that it’s not just the pandemic I could be worrying about. But my mindset is very calm, and I won’t move into fight-or-flight stress until it has a direct impact. Even then, being calm in the midst of a storm will serve you and me well.

Do we want to deal with any of it? Of course not. But we all deal with the cards we’re dealt. Until then, we can be ready for the worst, prepared in any area we can control. After that, we can either go down the road of stress and anxiety or the road of peace. 

Which road will you choose?

If this were your last month on earth, how would you want to live it? How do you want to interact with your family? What example do you want to share with them?

Choose wisely.

Eric Rhoads

PS: Is it possible for you to find things that give you peace and offer you a chance to be creative? Many of my friends are bound up in work-related stress. Recently I asked one of my friends, “How do you get away from it? What hobbies do you have?” His answer was that he could not get away and he had none.

When I recommended he take up painting, he said, “Sounds fun, but I don’t have what it takes. I was not born with an art gene.”

I’m spending my life helping people understand that there is no art gene required, and that if you can follow a mac-and-cheese recipe on a box, I can teach you the process of painting. Many don’t believe me, and others don’t believe me — but try, and are happily pleased they listened.

Some types of art are harder to learn than others. But when we were kids, most of us played with crayons. What if I could introduce you to adult crayons? Something you can use to create beauty, based on what you were familiar with as a kid?

Pastel is very sophisticated and very beautiful, but we work it like crayons. I have a Beginner’s Cay this Wednesday teaching pastel before my 3-day Pastel Live online event. Just taking the Beginner’s Day could change your life and help you lose your stress. And if you’re thinking that it’s not worth the risk, I offer a full money back guarantee. If you watch the first day and don’t think it’s for you, you get all your money back and you get the day you watched for free. 

I hope you’ll check it out. The price increase is tonight at midnight. PastelLive.com.

Pine cones and little rocks stick in my bare feet as I make my way down to the old wooden dock at the water’s edge. Reflected pine trees and blue sky are so mirror-like that if I took a photo and turned it upside down, you would swear you were looking at the real thing. In the distance I hear the sputter of an old outboard motor on a small metal fishing boat, and I can see the glow of a red hat about a half mile from the dock. 

The 100-year-old wooden Adirondack chair, which has been baking in the morning light, warms my back as I lie against it. Today is the perfect lake day, calling me to some kayaking into the grassy bogs. I’m in my happy place, and if it were not for that evil snow and 30 below weather, I’d be here year round. I’m on a quest to find a winter equal to this lake paradise where we plant ourselves each summer.

Sweet Times

I feel blessed to be able to be here and to pick and choose most of my living circumstances. As every summer ends and we’re set to return home, we say farewell and wish we were going home to something equally beautiful. But then, vacations would be less sweet if we were on vacation year round. There is value in having things to look forward to. In fact, I think you have to be deliberate about it.

Blindfolded at an Airport

Decades ago, when I was too busy to take a vacation, my wife begged me for just five days off so we could go somewhere special. As an anniversary surprise, I was blindfolded at the airport gate only to find out we had boarded the Concorde to London, which was a great way to save time on a short vacation. And though I loved the vacation and the experience, I would have loved it more having a year, or at least a few months, to look forward to it.

Looking Ahead

Making plans in advance was never my best skill set, but I’ve learned that looking forward to things can get you through a lot of tough times. I’ll tell myself, “Just a few more weeks and I’ll be in Russia painting,” or, “I can’t wait to see my friends at my fall painting retreat,” or, “I can’t wait till the kids have spring break so we can take a trip somewhere together.”

Making Myself Better

Planning my future, sometimes two or more years in advance, has turned out to be a powerful way to make sure I’m living life to the fullest. I used to tell myself I didn’t have the time, and now that I take the time, I’ve realized that time away makes me better at home and work. 

New Realities

Most of us have seen a recent shift in our priorities. Suddenly that two-hour daily commute is no longer appealing. Working in an office and wearing “dressy” clothes is less appealing than working from home, being more productive, and wearing your favorite T-shirt and yoga pants. And it turns out that pent-up demand for travel is something many have discovered. A busy buddy told me, “I’ve spent half my life putting off travel because I felt I needed to be at work all the time. But that’s about to change. I don’t want to wake up unable to see the world, and COVID made me rethink my priorities.”

If you’re telling yourself you don’t have the time or the money to do the things you always wanted to do, what you may really be saying is that you have not made it enough of a priority.

Finding a Way

At age 19, when my parents offered me a chance to meet them in Europe for my first visit there, I didn’t have time or money, but with a few months’ notice I took on extra gigs on nights and weekends, I accumulated as much vacation time as possible, and I scheduled it months in advance to make it happen. And I stopped buying $5 cups of coffee and eating lunch out. In other words, I found a way. And I suspect most of us can find a way if we work on it enough in advance.

I’ve had too many conversations with friends about their unrealized dreams, watched them delay their dreams, and then later gotten the call that they’ve passed away, moved to a nursing facility, or they are battling some dreadful disease. These past two years, the possibility has been more of a reality.

So I ask you…

What dream are you delaying?

What do you want to get done in your life that has not been started?

If you could only pick one thing, what would it be?

What’s your plan?

Putting things off may be practical, and going now may not be possible. But if you don’t make the commitment, don’t pull the trigger, you may never get it done.

Determined

A woman approached me at my Adirondack painting event this past spring. She said, “I’ve been trying to come for 10 years, but my husband got ill and I needed to be there to take care of him. This is the first time I could get here.”

I was so proud of her for doing the right thing, but then going for her dream the moment she could.

We had a couple come on one of our fine art trips to Europe. They told me, “We’ve been intending to come for years, but we just never got around to it. We’ll be back again next year.” But that year, one of them passed. I’m thankful they came.

An artist once wanted to come with me on my second trip to Cuba. He told me, “I can’t afford it, so I’ll go next time.” Thankfully, he found a creative way to raise the money, and it turns out there was no next time.

I’m not suggesting travel … but I am suggesting that there are things you want to do that you need to get started on now. Don’t let anything get in the way. Pull the trigger now.

Your dreams are important to you, and you need to find a way to live them. 

Take action now. 

You can always find a way.

Eric Rhoads

PS: A few years ago a lady saw me painting and said what people always say …  “I can’t even draw a stick figure. I wasn’t born with the gift of painting.” 

Of course, I said what I always say … “You can do this, you can learn. It’s not about natural talent, it’s about following a process and practice.” 

She took my free Paint By Note course online, and sent me images of her progress. Now, just about three years later, she is doing a great job and painting beautiful pictures.

I think it’s important to fight with the assumptions in our own minds. Why am I telling myself this? Is what I’m telling myself actually true?

You can do what you can set your mind to, but the key is setting your mind, and overcoming the things in your mind that are blocking you. 

If you find yourself saying…

“I could never…”

“I can’t…”

“I don’t have what it takes…”

“I don’t have the talent…

Your brain is lying to you because of something you absorbed from your parents, your friends, your kids, or your environment. This is a time to challenge all of your assumptions. Even if you tried before and failed. You can do this … whatever “this” is 

I’ve got hundreds of people who signed up for my Pastel Live virtual conference in a couple of weeks who have never before painted in pastel, but want to learn. I have others who have never painted in their lives but took the leap and told themselves they could do it. Pastel may be the easiest way to learn to paint because it is much like what we used as kids (though more sophisticated). If you’ve resisted learning to paint because of oil paints, acrylics, watercolor, or other mediums… this is your best shot at producing beautiful artwork. I highly recommend our Beginner’s Day (which is 100% guaranteed or your money back). I’m guaranteeing I can make you an artist, even if your brain is telling you it’s not possible. Take the shot. It could change your life forever.

The old green hammock sways gently between two old-growth white pine trees, a puddle of water and reddish pine needles in its middle. As I exit the house, the wet ground cover of deep green moss squishes like a thick carpet under my feet. In the combination of smoke from fires in the west and moisture from last night’s storm, the distant trees are a mustard bluish gray. The deep red geraniums in the flower boxes along the dock are worn and leggy from swimming in too much water.

This is the second-rainiest summer I can remember. The few sunny days are like Christmas presents. We look forward to them and cherish them as special days to get out for a warm, sun-drenched canoe ride.

Needles on My Face

My attitude about rain may be unique around here. Family members and locals have been complaining about all the rain. Though I can appreciate the desire for sunshine, I love the rain. Living essentially on an island and commuting by boat for groceries and packages, we’ve learned to accept it for what it is and plow forward. Just yesterday raindrops were hitting my face like needles as I sped across, trying to beat a giant storm and bolts of lightning.

Rain slows me down. The lack of light makes me want to chill, relax more, read a book. And my favorite sound is rain on the roof above. 

The Dreaded Nighttime Call

Life also has rain and storms. Late one night this week my phone rang, with my cousin’s name popping up. “Oh, no,” I thought. Knowing my aunt has been hospitalized and in rough shape, I assumed she had passed. But instead, it was my cousin Tim, who passed away at a young 60 years old. We were all devastated. It’s never easy when we see someone’s life cut short early.

A storm hit my family hard in the last couple of years, first losing my mom, then my dad, then my uncle, now my cousin. Sometimes it seems hard to take, and we start asking why: “Why me? Why now?” When we should be asking, “Why not me? Why not now?”

Rain and storms hit us all, personally and professionally. Just when things seem perfect, suddenly there is an unexpected event. And sometimes they come in clusters.

Clearing Trees

Yet storms clear out the forests, bringing down the weak trees and branches, and the rain nourishes the land, lending a hand to nature’s new growth. Last week I weathered a massive storm — the wind was blowing so hard I couldn’t stand up, and trees were going down around me. The power went down and didn’t come up for a couple of days. But soon rescue workers were on the way, cutting the overgrown trees that had fallen on power lines. Soon, things were better.

Between you and me, we know of storms and rain hitting friends around the world, or around the block. Suddenly discovered illnesses, often life-threatening. Sudden passings, sudden financial issues or business challenges, and at the moment, floods and fires impacting lives.

No matter how prepared, it’s never enough. Yet ultimately, it’s how we process the storm. Last week with my kids, I had to be the voice of calm to help alleviate fears. And when it was over, I played the role of cheerleader, pointing out the positive benefits. 

A Moment of Decision

A doctor friend once told me, “When I tell someone they have cancer, I can tell within five minutes whether they have a chance of beating it. They are all kicked in the stomach at first, but given a few minutes to process it, the ones who tell me they will beat it usually do. Attitude makes a huge difference.”

If there was a positive in losing my parents, it was connecting with their friends on a new level, or reconnecting with a long-lost family I’d not seen in 30 years and now staying in touch with them.

A Learned Skill

I don’t think any of us are naturally tuned to think positively, but those who do it have trained their brains to immediately look for the bright side. When they get punched, they get back up and keep going, and they look for a lesson or a benefit from being punched.

These are unusual times. None of us are looking forward to returning to lockdowns or masking, but some will be required. It seems like a time when a lot of things are changing, and it makes me wonder what lies ahead. But rather than dwelling on the negative, seek the lighter side and the reasons to embrace the cards we are dealt. 

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,

The courage to change the things I can,

And the wisdom to know the difference.

Always seek the light, the humor, and the benefits inside any storm. Storms strengthen us and renew us. Embrace them.

Eric Rhoads

PS: Today is a red letter day as I celebrate the people I work with. Laura Iserman celebrates a decade with my company today, Dean Pickering celebrates six years, and Kelly Powers celebrates three. I cherish the people I work with, and love it when we see them grow with us over the years. Thank you to each of you for sticking with me!

It won’t be long until our Pastel Live online art conference featuring some of the world’s finest pastel painters. I’m excited about expanding my horizons by learning pastel painting. There is still room for you this August.

My sold-out trip to Russia is no longer sold out due to some circumstances in people’s lives. I have a few slots open, and we still plan to go in mid-September (we won’t go if it turns out not to be safe, of course). It’s a lifetime chance to paint in an amazing place with the right guides at your side.

It won’t be long till the auction of my dad’s amazing property in the Adirondacks. I’m told there have been some celebrities looking. If you know someone seeking something rare and special, pass it on.

We just launched a new video showing how to paint watercolors from photographs with Michael Holter. I’m pretty excited about it.

My daily show is back, renamed Art School Live, with guests at noon (Eastern) every weekday. Join us one day.

Are you on Instagram? I am. Follow me @ericrhoads and I’ll follow you back.

An early morning sailor takes advantage of high winds as their antique boat darts back and forth across the lake with the grace of a ballerina, changing directions suddenly as the old tea-stained sail captures the orange morning light against the purple distant mountains.

It reminds me of life, sailing gracefully in one direction till the wind runs out, and then a necessary pivot to capture the wind takes us in new directions.

The Great Cleansing

When we lose a loved one, as I did this spring, we tend to think deeply about their life and our own, in hopes of being more or less like the ones we lost. And with loss comes responsibility — in this case, clearing out his lakefront summer home, where he had accumulated things since 1987. 

Here, Bidder Bidder

Because we are putting his home up for auction on August 14, my wife and I (mostly her) have been working feverishly to getting move-out ready and getting the home ready to show, so we don’t have to sort through old boxes under pressure of a closing date. 

Yesterday, and all last weekend, I had the pleasure of going through a garage full of boxes, one box at a time, including financial records, business archives, old photos, books, and random things that had stuffed drawers and shelves over decades. 

What to Let Go Of?

The tough decisions are what to shed and what to keep, knowing of things that had great meaning to him, but no meaning to us. Though I know I’ll never need them, I could not throw out the yearbooks from Fort Wayne Bible College and South Side High School, where my dad was the portrait photographer and where his ad for photography appeared. I only hung on to them because I felt he would not want us to let that part of his history go.

Going through a hundred or more boxes, file folder by file folder, I saw a life unfold. Press clippings, press releases, photos, business plans, contracts, and documents closing out those businesses. It was as if an entire life happened in a single day.

Life in a Box

When I wrote my book Blast from the Past: A Pictorial History of Radio’s First 75 Years, I experienced the same thing. I’d go through boxes and archives. I remember finding the old files for Jack Benny, who started in Vaudeville before radio. Clippings of his entire life fit into one big box. First was the clipping from a high school newspaper of his onstage appearance in school, then his first stage appearance, then reviews, then his entry into radio, then clippings about the shows, then his entry to TV, and it went on and on until the clipping of his obituary. A whole life in a box.

As I looked through hundreds of photos, trying to determine what to save, I saw my dad’s progression in life, becoming an officer in various organizations, photos of speeches and banquets, photos with unknown people. I could see the tremendous amount of work that went into that, and could imagine how excited he must have been to receive the appointments and press coverage. Yet I wondered if it was all worthwhile. Did it matter?

The Game of Life

I often look at life like a pinball machine. The ball shoots out of the spring-loaded launcher, heads to the top, hits a barrier, bounces off, hits another, and then you try to hit a flipper to keep the ball going. Sometimes you keep it going and add points, and sometimes your ball falls into the bottom, ending the game. In our lives we launch, often not knowing where we are going, but hoping we will gain points (which might be money, recognition, doing good works). Then we get flipped in a different direction, and we keep going again, till forced into a different direction still.

Unexpected Destinations

My dad once told me, “Son, you never end up where you set out to go. Enjoy the journey.” He gave me examples of businesses he had started with a specific intent that didn’t end up going in the direction he set out. Often, they turned out better.

When I started in radio, I envisioned being the next big radio star, but I ended up writing about radio, owning a radio trade magazine, and then, by accident, discovering art and building a life in the art world. It was not predictable.

I once wrote that roadblocks serve a purpose, often making us stronger, and often making us go down a different road. No matter how good we are at goal-setting and planning, we cannot anticipate all the roadblocks. Soon, the flipper pushes us in an unexpected direction.

Are Efforts Worthwhile?

What I learned from the boxes of a life well-lived is that we cannot control our direction entirely, though we can try, but the memories are all we have. Decades of paperwork, preceded by thousands of meetings and discussions, legal work, and negotiations — it all ended up in a dumpster. What matters is the outcome in life. Did the efforts serve to make a life well lived? Did the efforts result in making life better for others, not just for ourselves?

One day my kids will be going through my boxes (and hard drives), seeing evidence of all the things I once worried about where worry wasn’t necessary. Things I craved that turned out to be fruitless or meaningless, recognition I sought that served no purpose. It makes me realize the preciousness of every hour, of every glance into the eyes of my family, of every moment with my friends. 

Your time is your own to control. Use it wisely. Use it to make life better for others, not just to enrich yourself. 

Each photo was a memory, a moment, sometimes of things that took months or years to accomplish. A photo of an award onstage was the result of decades of serving others, hundreds of meetings and phone calls, and a tremendous amount of human energy. It’s why what you agree to spend your time on matters.

Over the years I’ve developed a filter in a series of questions I ask myself when I’m asked to make a commitment:

• Will it change the world or make life better for others in some way?
• Do I want to spend my time on it? Will it take me away from things that have higher importance?
• Is it related to my grand mission, or does it take me off focus?
• Is it important to help someone or some organization I love or respect?
• Will I look back in regret?
• Will it help others?
• Will it help my family?
• Will it take me away from home and family?
• Will I look back on my life and be glad I took the time and effort?
• How much time will it take to see it through, and will it be worth it?

I tend to be a pleaser, a giver. Yet we can give all we have and leave nothing for ourselves. We have to find balance. Coming up with your own list of questions will help you determine where to spend your time. 

Remember that one split-second decision can change everything and place you at the end of the game, or on a new journey that will take another decade to accomplish. In either case, you want to guard your time.

Though I’d rather not have to sort through boxes, and I’m reminded that I must not leave a mess for my wife and kids, there were great lessons and thoughts from the cathartic effort. And whenever I’m doing something I’d rather not do, I always ask myself what lessons I’m supposed to discover.

What will be in your boxes? What will be the best time you can spend the rest of your life on?

Spend it well. Your time is the most valuable currency on earth.

Eric Rhoads

PS: When my dad became ultra-successful, he was incredibly busy, a ball of stress, and often irritable. I remember wondering if it was all worth it. I remember wishing I had the dad back who used to take us fishing and waterskiing and canoeing. But it did not seem like that was in the cards, and I resigned myself that this was who he had become. But little did I know that he too had realized what was missing from his life, and he too wanted those days back.

As I look at all the papers, all the deals, all the meetings and travel, I realize that my dad went to all that effort so he could provide his family with exceptional experiences and memories. We’d stayed at a lake before, but when he moved our family to the Adirondacks, he became a better dad because the stress melted from his busy life and we got our real dad back. We have 30-plus years of memories at his place, every summer of my kids’ lives and every summer of my niece’s and nephew’s. It was a place where the family could renew its connection and build lasting memories. By spending a weekend or a few weeks between meetings at the camp, he became better in business and became a better dad.

He built an amazing place, and it’s my hope that the auction will result in the right family that needs a special place like no other on earth, to reconnect and to lose the stress of life. There are very few places on earth with this peace and quiet, with this tradition. I know, because we have our own camp now, and intend it to carry for generations of our family.

PS2: I discovered something about myself recently. When I held my artists’ retreat in the Adirondacks in June, I discovered how much I missed being around people, and how much those events mean to me, because I make so many new friends and renew so many friendships. Dave Crowl, who attended, said it best: “I’ve come back nine years in a row because this is my art family, and for me it’s like Thanksgiving. I would not miss it for anything.”

I’m doing my next retreat this fall here in the Adirondacks. I can never get enough friends.

PS 3: One of my bucket list items was to paint in Russia, where Repin, Levitan, and Shishkin and the great Russian masters painted. I’ve done it, and now I’m bringing it to you one time. It looks like it will happen, and I have some seats because a couple of people can’t make it. I probably won’t repeat it. Hope you’ll come.

Also, Peter Trippi and I are leading a group of art lovers to the museums and art scenes of Vienna and Berlin this October. It’s happening and will be loads of fun. Join us.

PS 4: Pastel Live is gaining momentum. Last week we had a huge number of people join us. If you see yourself learning pastel painting, it’s a joy to attend (and it’s all online this August).