How to Control Your Brain to Get What You Want in Life

Ahhhh, it’s beginning to look a lot like … Hawaii. The morning air is warm and humid, and the only things missing are the ocean, surfers, palm trees, and grass skirts. I’m happy to be in Texas, where life is about as normal as it can be and freedom is a priority. And with weather like this, I don’t need to escape to stay warm. Let’s hope it lasts.

Guns and Horses

I’m not much of a TV guy, but my wife and I started binge-watching Yellowstone, and I think I’ve had this lifetime childhood fantasy about being a cowboy. I love the rough and tough life, wearing a six-shooter on my hip, spending my days on a horse under my big broad cowboy hat. We love the scenes with horses and cattle stampedes.

People think those of us in Texas live that life. Well, some do. We don’t, and though it sounds romantic, I’m guessing my back would be pretty cranky after days on a horse. I used to get sore when riding as a kid.

My Bad Day on a Horse

Years ago someone had the bright idea that my brother and I should take English riding lessons. We went to an indoor arena at the outskirts of our hometown and learned to ride English, which seemed a lot harder than a Western saddle. We would go for lessons weekly, and honestly, I did not like it very much. It all ended one day when my brother and I were in a competition and the horse decided to buck me into the side of a wall. I guess he showed me who was boss. I lived, even got a ribbon, but I allowed that one minor incident to dissuade me from riding anymore. Remembering this makes my cowboy fantasy less attractive.

I was probably about 8 or 9 at the time, and I had not yet figured out the importance of having control of my mind. If I had, perhaps I’d be the boss today instead of the horse and I’d be riding a ranch.

Controlling My Mind

Even though I tend to master what I set out to learn, I still have shortcomings. Just this past week, I decided to take a course on controlling my subconscious mind. It was right up my alley because I talk a lot about manifesting things. But this course made me realize that I was missing some critical elements.

I’ve always been a bit of a self-talk, “power of positive thinking” kind of guy — managing what I say to myself and telling myself who I am and what I want, putting things in the present tense, such as “I am a success” instead of “I’m gonna be a success.” We’re told to see ourselves in that place.

Though this course taught that principle, they took it to a new level I had not previously understood.

What happens when you say to yourself, “I am a success,” but your subconscious mind does not believe it?

Some would say repetition will overcome the problem, but this course said that’s just lying to yourself.

Your Subconscious Is Calling the Shots

It turns out that 80 percent of what you believe takes place in your subconscious mind. No matter how much you tell yourself something consciously, your subconscious is there to protect you and as a result of that, it can sabotage success. I can tell myself I’m thin forever, but if my subconscious mind is saying, “I am fat,” then change is unlikely to occur without some clever manipulation of the subconscious.

When you hear the words “I am,” it’s usually tied to a limiting belief. Our identity is made up of “I am” statements.

For instance, “I am a smoker,” is an identity statement. Yet smoking is not an identity, it’s a behavior. We’ve confused who we are with something we do.

If you change how you talk about your identity statements, you can change the outcome.

Instead of your brain saying, “I am lazy,” you can reframe it as, “Sometimes I do lazy things,” which changes your perspective.

Getting this?

If you stop connecting “I am” statements and swap them for “I have” statements, things begin to change, because “I have” statements are more believable.

Lots of us get hung up on childhood moments of trauma. And we lock these memories in our heads and they become our roadblocks.

But you are NOT a memory. An emotion or memory is something you DO.

Instead of “I am emotional,” change it to, “I have emotions,” or, “I do emotions”

I Feel It in My Bones

When I tell myself something affirmative, if I pay close attention to my body, my body will react to anything my subconscious does not believe. This is where you find the clues about the subconscious roadblocks. Solve the roadblocks and you can do almost anything.

What Is Believable

I tested this as I took the course. I said, “I am successful,” and I immediately noticed an ache in my neck. There is an entire process about how to overcome these clues, which I’ll cover some other time.

Meanwhile, simply by reframing things, we’ll find our subconscious mind does not block us as much. For instance, “I do things that lead to success. I embody actions that make success possible” — this is believable.

Can You FEEL It?

The course said that everything we do as humans is a response to a feeling … a feeling we want more of, or less of.  Every feeling has a body location and will speak up when you tell yourself something your subconscious does not believe.

When you reframe, such as my success statement, there must be action tied to it immediately. In this case, what are the things that lead to success, and what actions am I taking?

Your Homework

If you really want to have an interesting Christmas break, sit down quietly and start thinking about the stories you tell yourself. What are your “I am” statements? What is your self-talk? When you think of doing something amazing, what is your mind telling you about it? Once you do that, start asking yourself, “Where do I feel it?” If you feel it, that means your subconscious is holding you back in that area.

Now reframe everything from “I am” to actions. It instantly makes you feel better and makes things feel more possible.

I don’t pretend to understand even a fraction of the science behind this, and I’ve signed up for a longer course so I can improve myself. I don’t ever want to stop improving, and I’m curious how far I can go, what I can accomplish.

Unrealized Dreams

The reason I did this course is that I realized there are several big dreams that are not happening, and realized that I’m telling myself things. For instance, I tell myself, “I am not good at raising money. I am not good at asking others for money,” and that has roadblocked me on a project. Unless I can reprogram my beliefs, that project will go unfinished. What about you?What are the big dreams never accomplished?

What are the “I am” stories you’re hearing yourself say?

We can overcome them, but first we have to overcome the roadblocks in our subconscious mind.

Eric Rhoads

PS: Next time we talk, it will be after Christmas. I want to thank you for being here to read my thoughts each Sunday, and thank you for sharing them and helping this letter spread worldwide. As I examine myself, you get to come along for the ride, and maybe pick up an idea or two for yourself.

King Soloman was the richest and wisest man in the world. As I read about him, the one thing he did better than anyone on earth at the time was that he was in a constant state of self-improvement till the day he died. He changed the world. He accomplished amazing things. And it was all tied to being curious, seeking growth.

Whether you’re young or old, it’s never too early or too late. There are no limits to what you can still do. (Listen to what your brain just told you when I said that. Chances are it said, “Yeah, there are. I’m too old, or have physical ailments, or I’m not experienced enough,” etc.) Listen for your “I am” statements.

Have a wonderful Christmas. Absorb it.

Here’s what’s going on this week…

• It makes me feel awesome every time a top artist signs with our company to produce their videos. We have most of the top artists in the world with us. It feels great that they notice the difference in our productions and presentations. I’m honored to announce that we just officially launched the new Kevin Macpherson Magic Grid Landscapes video, which is beyond amazing. And you can watch today if you order the digital version. The same is true for our recent Camille Przewodek video on color. She is an amazing colorist, and her teaching is legendary. It will teach you to see color differently. I drove an hour to her class every Monday for two years. She is life-changing. I love all of our artists and want to wish them a Merry Christmas.
• Still need a gift in time for Christmas? Give a digital art instruction video — you can do it last-minute and not have to wait for shipping. We have hundreds of them. Check out our digital video library at PaintTube.TV and gift an artist today!
• When I was a kid my grandmother bought me a subscription to Boys’ Life. Every time it came, I thought of my grandmother. For the art lovers in your life, PleinAir Magazine and Fine Art Connoisseur are each about $40 a year. It’s a gift that reminds people of you every time it arrives. You can order the subscription now and give a card that it’s on the way to them.
• Our online conference Watercolor Live is on fire. I’m blown away by the huge number of people already signed up. It’s a great way to learn watercolor from the top people in the world (and we have a Beginner’s Day). It’s going to make a great Christmas gift for the budding artist in your life. And you can buy it up to the last minute.
• One of the reasons my company launched virtual online conferences is because we were not able to hold our in-person events like the Plein Air Convention. We’ve been in survival mode ever since. Well, hopefully that will change. The Plein Air Convention is planned for May, is already 50% sold out, and after the first notice about it went out, we sold a lot more seats than we anticipated. People are ready for the plein air family to gather again, and lots more people are joining the family and want to go. My guess is that it will be a giant sellout fast. (Being in Santa Fe does not hurt.) And keep in mind, we were almost sold out each of the two times we had to cancel. We talked to the hotel this week and they said we may have to social-distance, which might mean we have to limit the number who can come. If we have to take 200-400 fewer people, you’ll want to register now to make sure you’re able to go. And, to make you more secure, there is a 100% refund in the event we have to cancel or you don’t feel safe. Also, we have a pre-convention workshop with Kevin Macpherson that will sell out even faster.
• I’m taking a Christmas break from my daily Art School Live show this week, but replays will occur.
• My Russia painting and museum trip will happen next September. We just changed the dates slightly; the new dates are now posted on the website. We were sold out and will be again. Another great gift.

Groggy and walking out of my dark bedroom, I’m wondering if I awoke in the middle of the night. A glance at my watch tells me it’s morning, but the sky is dim and dark, as if the light is hiding out under a curtain of dark clouds, waiting to go onstage. The air is thick and muggy, like a wet rag ready to be wrung out. The good news is the cloud cover is providing a deafening silence, as though my ears are stuffed with cotton.

Though I love the spirit of heavenly sunshine, days like this slow me down, make me want to curl up on the couch with a book or a sketch pad and take some much-deserved time for myself. If we don’t build rest into our lives, nature will build it for us. Today is a great example.

Powerful Words

This morning I read a line in the Bible that I had never heard: “though he died, he still speaks.” (Hebrews 11).

Here I am reading a story about something a man did 2,500 years ago, and that man is still speaking. It got me thinking.

Who is speaking in my life, though she or he is long gone?

The other day I was coaching my son in the kitchen, drawing out a little chart to show him how to get ahead in life. I flashed back to the moment in the kitchen when my dad drew out the same chart for me as a teenager. When I was telling my son, it was really my dad speaking, though he passed away back in April. And chances are he was repeating something that someone else had said to him years before.

I’m Hearing Voices

When painting, I can hear the exact voice and words of my now-deceased mentor Jack Jackson. “I don’t want to see a single brushstroke,” he would say. His words echo in my mind though he has been gone for over two decades.

My grandmothers were always telling me things, and those things still come up in my mind. I’m guessing they were passed down through dozens, possibly hundreds, of generations. Morning devotionals and lots of exposure to biblical thinking, passed on for numerous generations

What about you?

Who from the past is still speaking?

Something about that line from the Bible was hitting me in the face with a two-by-four. SMACK!

It made me realize the importance of guarding our words and actions, because they will live on beyond us.

Bad Habits Carried into the Future

They say that verbal or physical abuse lives on through generations. Will those times when I got super angry and said something to my kids scar them for life? Worse, will it scar their kids, their grandkids, and a hundred generations beyond? I admire people who are strong enough to not repeat the behavior of generations before them.

Cranky or Kind?

My great-grandfather William Berry was, I’m told by my dad, the kindest person he had ever known. His wife, my great-grandmother, was, I’m told, the meanest. My great-grandfather’s approach, his example, his words lived on through my dad, and hopefully through me. In that case either the kind grandpa’s or the mean grandma’s example could have lived on. Kindness won. And though I barely knew my great-grandmother, her mean spirit came from somewhere … probably her parents.

How will your words and example live on for generations?

Sometimes we forget that the formative years before age 5 typically set the tone for a life, and how the little parental training we have tends to come from the example of our parents. I think this is the magic of a two-parent system, when that is possible, and the magic of the influence of grandparents. Children raised by two parents get a second chance, and possibly a balanced approach. Grandparents provide even more options for balance.

Being Deliberate

When I read these words in the Bible (“though he died, he still speaks”), it reminded me of the importance of being deliberate about what messages we want to have sink in, and hopefully pass on for generations.

Repeat After Me

When I teach marketing to artists, I talk about the importance of repetition. I noticed that when something was really important to my mom or dad, or one of my business or art mentors, they made sure to repeat those things time and time again.

Most of us, myself included, are probably not organized enough to be deliberate and write down a lesson plan for those we want to teach. But what if we did?

What would be the three or five messages that are so important that you would want them to live on for generations?

Like it or not, some of your words and actions are still speaking and will speak for generations.

This is a great reminder that you have a choice in determining what lives on.

Perhaps there are family traditions that need to be broken so they are not passed on. Perhaps there are replacements for those traditions that do need to live on.

Will the good words, the good deeds — or the bad ones — live on?

Will you impart lessons that will be passed on for generations?

You get to decide.

Eric Rhoads

PS: This week I received a note from a woman who lives alone and said that she had just come out of the lockdown she’s been in since March of 2020. She has been stuck in her small one-window apartment for almost two years, having left just one time. It made me very sad. This has been such a trying time for so many.

The silver lining in this is that she shared that she would have had a much harder time if it had not been for the daily Art School Live broadcasts we’ve been doing at noon on Facebook since the pandemic began. She said they helped her to feel connected in the chat with others, and gave her something to look forward to each day to help her survive. She also mentioned that she had never done any art, but we taught her how, and she was able to order supplies, paint along, and also study some of the training videos we’ve created.

Her note reinforced the importance of each of us stepping up to help others in our own way. When I launched the daily show, which was intended for the two weeks they initially told us we would be locked down, I never anticipated how much work it would be for me and others. Yet the rewards have been high, and I’d not change a thing. We each have gifts, and now more than ever, we need to share those gifts to help others.

I’ve decided to bake cookies and distribute them to a few neighbors we have not met, just to let them know there is a neighbor who is thinking about them. Though it’s more common during the holidays, it’s a reminder to me that we never know who needs us, who will be encouraged by a small, simple gesture.

Shopping…

Like all years, I’ve told myself my goal is to NOT set foot in a shopping mall, which is my least favorite place to be. I’m behind on my shopping, but I’m determined to get it all done this week and not be out on Christmas Eve desperately searching for something at the last minute. We’ve put together a page of art-related gifts here.

The Season

Many of us will face a season alone because of quarantines or because family still can’t get together. Please know we’re thinking of you. And if you’re lucky enough to have the family together this year, put your phones down and absorb the beauty of family.

Streamline

Years ago I named my company Streamline because I was a big rail fan and loved Streamline trains and streamlined design. It was also a metaphor for being more efficient, which has been my goal. I’m always asking, “How can I accomplish big things that for others require hundreds of people with a small, efficient, and effective team?” We do it every week, and I want to acknowledge the entire Streamline team (which is growing!). By the way, we have some openings for art editors (part or full time), and we’re looking for someone to lead and work with artists and customers for our art instruction business. We also need some more digital layout people and some social media specialists and producers. Reach out if you know anyone.

Speaking of Streamline, here’s what’s going on this week…

• For the art lovers in your life, PleinAir Magazine and Fine Art Connoisseur are each about $40 a year. It’s a gift that reminds people of you every time it arrives.
• Last week we released a pretty impressive video course from the great Kevin Macpherson. It’s about his Magic Grid system, which he developed because of vision problems, and it has reinvented how people paint. Check it out.
• Camille Przewodek’s new colorist course is breaking records in sales for the year. It’s a hot seller and one everyone wants to see.
• Months ago I started hearing a lot of buzz about an artist everyone loved. As I started digging into his work, it was easy to understand why. People started asking me to shoot a video, which is a major commitment financially, but we took a chance, and we’re glad we did. Kyle Buckland has his own unique approach, and just one of the tips in his video completely changed something I do now in all of my paintings, and that resulted in a big improvement in how they look. You might find his new video helpful.
• One of the reasons my company launched virtual online conferences is because we were not able to hold our in-person events like the Plein Air Convention. We’ve been in survival mode ever since. Well, hopefully that will change. The Plein Air Convention is planned for May, is already 50% sold out, and after the first notice about it went out this week, we sold a lot more seats than we anticipated. People are ready for the plein air family to gather again, and lots more people are joining the family and want to go. My guess is that it will be a giant sellout fast. (Being in Santa Fe does not hurt.) And keep in mind, we were almost sold out each of the two times we had to cancel.The reason to book now is that you want to be sure you can get in. If you wait, you might not be able to. And, to make you more secure, there is a 100% refund in the event we have to cancel or you don’t feel safe. Also, we have a pre-convention workshop with Kevin Macpherson that will sell out even faster.
• Be sure to watch my Art School Live show this week at noon Eastern by following Eric Rhoads, Publisher, on Facebook. And please follow me @ericrhoads on Instagram. I’ll be on several days next week, but then I may take a break for the holidays.
• Our online conference Watercolor Live is on fire. I’m blown away by the huge number of people already signed up. It’s a great way to learn watercolor from the top people in the world (and we have a Beginner’s Day). It’s going to make a great Christmas gift for the budding artist in your life.
• We are anticipating that my Russia painting and museum trip will happen next September. We’re making some changes and new dates soon, but go to the website and sign up to be notified. We were sold out and will be again, but we’re trying to find a way to take a few more people, so get on that waiting list. Another great gift.

It’s the perfect day. Not hot, not cool. A slight breeze, just enough to make the leaves sway. Fall color of deep burnt orange, with some slight green and red edges, has filled the big tree across the road. It’s something I paint annually. I’m hopeful I’ll get around to it before the leaves carpet the ground below.

I can remember one late fall, right about this time, my dad brought us the greatest Christmas gift of all … a baby mountain lion. This occasion marked a change in my father’s life, after hunting every fall or winter.

Boom

He had been in Cody, Wyoming, where he shot a mountain lion up in a tree. Instead of celebrating, as hunters often do, tears welled up in his eyes as he discovered he had killed the mother of a cub. He could not leave the cub there to die, so he brought it home and we raised it in our garage. That was the moment he swore off hunting for good.

Zookeeper

Our lion had two names. We started with Lionel, like the trains, but later we named him Blinkie. He had the most beautiful eyes and long lashes. He became our family pet. We would play with him, like you would any pet. But he kept getting bigger and bigger, and finally, we had to give him up to the Fort Wayne Children’s Zoo. We would visit him at the zoo almost weekly for a while, and he recognized us, though we could no longer go in the cage with him because he had grown so large.

The Giant Among Us

Within a year or two he grew even larger, too large for a children’s zoo, where they want “teen” animals. So Blinkie was transferred to the small zoo in Bluffton, Indiana. The first thing I did when I got my driver’s licence was drive to the zoo to see him. The last time I saw him he was probably 12 feet long, head to tail. He was massive, and, sadly, he would pace back and forth inside his cage. When I visited, even as a teen he had not seen for a few years, I felt as though he recognized me. I thought he should be released back to the wild, but was told he would not survive because he had been domesticated.

I’m told mountain lions live about 21 years in captivity, but sadly, I don’t know the rest of the story and have been unable to learn anything about what happened to Blinkie.

Lessons Learned

What I did learn is that there are certain moments in our lives that have such profound impact on us that we often make radical change overnight. For my dad, it was the end of his hunting.

As I filter through my lifetime of memories, there are moments of instant change based on my own stupid decisions. I got fired once for putting my fist through a wall at the radio station because I had been drinking and was out of control. I had to make instant change. And I’ve lost friendships and relationships because I did not think before speaking or I lost my temper. In fact, as a child I had a horrible temper, which I cured when I destroyed a favorite toy in anger, and my parents refused to replace it.

What about you?Are there moments you regret that changed you instantly?

A Mark of Maturity

I think one of the differences between immature and mature people is the ability for self-correction. If I had retained all the bad habits from my earlier years, I’m not sure I would have survived. Sadly, many do not, or their lives continually repeat mistakes where lessons were not learned.

Be Still

Still, I have to stop myself, immerse myself in silence, and ask myself what lessons I still need to learn, and in what ways I can improve by changing my behavior. Yes, I still make stupid, impulsive mistakes that damage relationships or my own circumstances.

As we enter the season of giving, give yourself the gift of quiet time to evaluate how it’s going, what needs to change or improve.

Where are you still causing harm to yourself or others?

What are others telling you that you’re not hearing?

What would happen if you gave up certain behaviors?

Then ask yourself why you haven’t changed.
Maybe the pain isn’t painful enough. Maybe your pride is in the way.

I may get more wisdom with time, but I still cling to too many bad habits, still can improve the way I interact with my family and others, and still can fine-tune my machine.

Where do you need to fine-tune?

The highway of life is better when you’re cruising at 75 mph with all cylinders in perfect harmony. If you’re not, change the plugs and blow the carbon out of your life. You’ll never regret it.

Eric Rhoads

Back in the fall I held a goal-setting meeting with my team, where we planned our 2022 for the business based on my personal goals. It’s never too late to consider your 2022 plans too, and if you can also get to it before the start of the year, you’ll make your year better by getting started earlier. More on that another time.

Speaking of my team, we always seem to go a million miles per hour, flirting with new ideas and new projects to make life better for our friends and customers. Here are a few things going on this week.

• The December PleinAir Salon $33,000 Art Competition is underway. Tuesday is the last day to enter for the Early Bird discount of 25% off your entry. This is a great way to allow yourself to enter even more paintings. The annual Grand Prize winner can win $15,000 cash and the cover of PleinAir Magazine. Check out the details here.
• We are releasing a new video from the amazing master artist Kevin Macpherson this week, so keep an eye on your e-mail for that announcement. This is monumental!! If you want a sneak peek, go here.
• Oh, and we just released a killer new video from Kyle Buckland, on Courageous Color, which you can find here.
• For the art lovers in your life, PleinAir Magazine and Fine Art Connoisseur are each about $40 a year, and a gift that reminds people of you every time it arrives.
• We just released our Wishbook of hundreds of art instruction videos for all levels of artists. You can get it here free or visit our store at www.streamlineartvideo.com.
• And Camille Prezwodek, the colorist and my teacher, is rapidly becoming one of the biggest video sellers of the year. Check it out here.
• I should mention that the Plein Air Convention will sell out fast (it’s already 50% sold) for next May in Santa Fe. We are expecting more new people than ever, including lots attending the Basics Course. But we have to limit attendance, so I recommend not waiting. You can cancel any time without penalty. I know I’d love it as a gift. You can learn more here.
• Be sure to watch my Art School Live show this week at noon Eastern by following Eric Rhoads, Publisher, on Facebook. And please follow me @ericrhoads on Instagram. I’ll be on several days next week, but then may take a break for the holidays.
• Our online conference Watercolor Live is on fire. I’m blown away by the huge number of people already signed up. It’s a great way to learn watercolor from the top people in the world (and we have a Beginner’s Day). It’s going to make a great Christmas gift for the budding artist in your life.
• We are anticipating that my Russia painting and museum trip will happen next September. We’re making some changes and new dates soon, but go to the website and sign up to be notified. We were sold out and will be again, but we’re trying to find a way to take a few more people, so get on that waiting list. Another great gift.

Awakening on a holiday is a special feeling, with the anticipation of seeing family and friends. The smell of baked goods is in the air from last night, and soon the smell of turkey, gravy, and all of our favorite dishes will permeate the air.

What permeates the air matters. What is in the air at your Thanksgiving gathering? Will it be harmony or strife? Joy or anger?

During the Civil War, families were divided by their beliefs in what was or was not right. Brothers fought brothers. Some families lost all of their sons to the war.

Tough Holidays

Though I have fond memories, Thanksgiving in our house was occasionally unpleasant. Someone would speak up and criticize the ideals of others, and the joy-filled gathering we’d all looked forward to would be turned into a day we could not wait to be over.

Because we were together, sometimes after not seeing one another for months, it became the time for people to express their passionate ideals and to be critical of others with whom they disagreed. Rarely did it end well. Someone would throw a fit, walk out early, or act out in anger.

Blowing My Cool

How did that affect me? I became one who avoids conflict. When I hear anyone yelling for any reason, I can feel my blood pressure rising. I either have to escape the room or ask everyone to stop before it pulls me in and I blow my top, screaming out, “Please stop yelling!”

If you think about the purpose of Thanksgiving today, it is to gather your loved ones, to spend time together and be grateful for one another. Especially since many of us have been unable to see family in person for so long. If everyone comes in with being grateful for one another in mind, it can help. Arguing is unlikely to change anyone’s mind anyway.

Why ruin Thanksgiving?

No Drama

When I hold my in-person or virtual events, I lay out the rules in advance. Why? Because I hate drama. My rule is simply “no drama,” and I’m very clear that if drama occurs, I’ll ask you to leave. It’s only happened one time in 11 years, when a guest was obsessively negative with everyone, complaining about everything unreasonably. So I took this guest aside and asked her to leave, offering a full refund. It got her attention, and she behaved the rest of the time.

You’re Wrong!

We live in a polarized world. We’re going to disagree. Sadly, we’ve all become so convinced that we’re right that we’re unable to carry on civilized conversations and listen to others’ perspectives. We used to be able to disagree and remain friends, but these days, that is often not the case.

I hereby declare this NO DRAMA THANKSGIVING. Simple rules: No drama. No politics. No vaccination debates. And nothing that’s going to destroy the purpose of being together.

If you have to post the rules on the door, so be it.

Of course, do what you wish. But think about this.

What if this is the last time you see your family? Do you want to spend it arguing?

Turn the Other Cheek

There are times when I feel like going to battle, but I bite my tongue. Quite simply, I don’t need to win and I’m unwilling to rock friendships because we are not in sync in some areas. Instead, I seek to find common ground we both love.

Life is too short (proven recently for far too many).

Embrace your differences. Heal your wounds.

Forgive others.

Have a loving and peaceful Thanksgiving.

Eric Rhoads

PS: In case this newsletter is reaching you for the first time, I write a weekly message on Sunday mornings (and sometimes on holidays). You can subscribe here for free. For those who read regularly, thank you. I truly am grateful. There is nothing as satisfying as meeting you and hearing that you read Sunday Coffee every week. 🙂

In the Rhoads family, we’re keeping it small this year. Just my wife and the kids. We’ve missed them since they’ve been away at college, so this is an important time to just enjoy their presence. But there will be a big sign over the table saying, “Save the drama for the theater.”

Here is what’s going on at Streamline this week.

• We are going to have some awesome Black Friday/Cyber Monday deals, so be sure to check out Streamline.Art over the next few days.
• Don’t forget that the deadline to enter your art into the PleinAir Salon for a chance at $15,000 and the cover of PleinAir Magazine is coming up on the 30th.
• We’ll be releasing a new video from Kevin Macpherson soon, so keep an eye on your e-mail for that announcement. This is monumental!! You can find it here. We offered it at Realism Live last week, and lots of people were thrilled to get it.
• Oh, and we just released a killer new video from Kyle Buckland, which you can find here.
• And Camille Prezwodek, the colorist and my teacher, is rapidly becoming one of the biggest video  sellers of the year.
• I should mention that the Plein Air Convention will sell out fast (it’s already 50% sold) for next May in Santa Fe. And because of my daily broadcast, we will see more new people than ever, including lots attending the Basics Course. But we have to limit attendance, so I recommend not waiting. You can cancel any time without penalty. I know I’d love it as a Christmas or Hanukkah gift.
• Be sure to watch my Art School Live show this week at noon Eastern by following Eric Rhoads, Publisher on Facebook.  And please follow me @ericrhoads on Instagram.

I feel so blessed to stare out my window this morning and see the brilliance of color splashed on the trees in the back of the property, the distant gray-blue hills, and the twinkle of light kissing the slightly moving leaves. Sleepily I shuffle across the porch, hot coffee in hand, shoeless, and my ears are treated to the sounds of Sunday morning as I open the door. A distant lawnmower from a neighbor, the faraway harmony of a train horn, and the sounds of notes coming from tiny beaks.

But how do tiny beaks become big birds? How do we as mere mortals become mega-mortals, or giants? How does one become the top in one’s field? How do people become wealthy or highly accomplished?

There is no easy answer, but I can share some clues.

1. It starts with work ethic. No one I’ve ever met that at the top had it easy. Outworking everyone else is the starting point. You have to be willing to do everything, and work harder than anyone you know, and have the ability to sustain a high level of work for decades, even after your success begins.
2. Next on the list is passion, desire, and commitment. I never have believed that money is a driver for most people. Money is a byproduct. But if you are passionate and committed to something, you’ll work to make it happen and won’t get discouraged when things get difficult.
3. The biggest challenge in success is mindset. Your mindset controls everything — which can be positive or negative. Most of us have deep limitations in our beliefs about our ability or ideas. A good rule of thumb … if the idea seems impossible and scares you, that’s the idea you should pursue. If it does not seem impossible, it’s not big enough.
4. Next, embrace and overcome your fear, giving yourself the courage to go forward. You need to adopt the attitude that you’re going forward no matter how difficult.
5. Of course with work ethic, passion, commitment, mindset, and overcoming fear, you still have the problem of not knowing HOW to do it. You cannot succeed without capability. But where do you get it? I believe when the other things are aligned, you will do what it takes to learn what you need. We tend to rise to the occasion each time we need more capability.
6. The final step is confidence, which comes with the accomplishments you make. Confidence drives you to embrace fear, and keep stepping out to get beyond the next limitation.

I might go so far as to say that sometimes a little luck or a little timing comes into play, but most people make their luck and are ready to jump on opportunity because of their mindset, their willingness to overcome fear, and their courage.

The other thing is that, though it’s lonely at the top (true), we all need other people to help us succeed. It’s important to pick people who believe in your passion, people you can trust. And be sure to share your goals with others (though they may not dream as big as you).

Limitations do exist, but fewer than we think. And if you have courage, you look at roadblocks and ask yourself how to get over, under, or around them. Most limitations are fear-driven and self-imposed. Overcoming these kinds of limitations is the best predictor of success. In reality, in most cases you’re not too young, too old, too underprivileged, too sick, too poor. Motivation comes from desire to solve a problem like poverty or bad circumstances.

And if you think being privileged offers an advantage, it sometimes does, and sometimes does not. I know wealthy people who gave their kids opportunity, but the kids did nothing with it. Wealth isn’t a predictor. Passion is.

If you allow yourself to have big dreams, you can make them happen. I deeply believe this. My belief isn’t based on theory but from seeing it in action. You truly can dream the impossible dream.

Eric Rhoads

PS: Necessity is the mother of invention. Sometimes our plans don’t work out. When COVID hit, it slammed my business and we were on the edge of not surviving. But we had to face it head on, and do it fast, and that meant facing fear head on. It also meant reinvention. The good news is that so far, by doing online events, we’ve been able to get through it. Just this past week, ending last night, we wrapped up our four-day Realism Live event. Our next one, in January, will be Watercolor Live.

I’d like to thank the hundreds of people worldwide who joined us to learn, grow, and be part of the community of artists. I’m honored by your presence.

PPS: If you follow me on Facebook or Instagram  (please do) stay tuned for a new art challenge in honor of Thanksgiving. I’ll be announcing it soon!

Here is what’s going on at Streamline this week.

• The deadline to sign up for our next virtual online conference, Watercolor Live, and save up to $600 off your ticket is TOMORROW, November 15.
• Tuesday, November 16 is your last chance to get the new Kyle Buckland video, Courageous Color, at a pre-release discount! Don’t miss out before the price goes up.
• I’m always signing artists who are hot. In fact, we don’t sign anyone unless they are the best of the best, or if they are a hot up-and-comer. We’ll be releasing a new video from Kevin Macpherson soon, so keep an eye on your e-mail for that announcement.
• We’re all ready to be out and about freely, with our family of artists. If that’s you, I should mention that the Plein Air Convention will sell out fast (it’s already 50% sold) for next May in Santa Fe. And because of my daily broadcast, we will see more new people. But we have to limit it to 1,200 people, so I recommend not waiting. You can cancel any time without penalty.
• Be sure to watch my Art School Live show this week at noon Eastern by following Eric Rhoads, Publisher on Facebook

In the distance, as I sit on this old porch, I can hear the hum of a train whistle, a million miles away. It is barely audible, yet there is something so soothing about that sound. Somehow it brings me back to a better time, a time when I was a kid, and we would actually take locomotives to Chicago.

In fact, trains became a part of my life in many ways. We always had a train set around the Christmas tree (still do), and my best friend was a “railfan” who had his entire basement filled with a giant train town, with multiple tracks. We would put our puffy striped train hats on and play with his trains for hours. Once we had our driver’s licenses, we would drive to intersections at certain times to watch trains pass, and we would walk tracks just to be closer to the train world.

Clackity-Clack

One day, my friend Charlie called and said, “Let’s go, we’re going up to the train in Angola,” which was about an hour north of us. He had been part of a team that found an old train in Tennessee and managed to ship it to Indiana, restore it, and give rides. People would come from all over to ride the Little River Railroad. On this particular day, we had a mission. Being a self-taught musician, Charlie had determined that at a certain speed, each crosstie holding the track equaled a beat. So he calculated when the train would reach a certain speed, and at what spot. We then went to that spot and placed gun caps on the rails for about half a mile.

With a recorder down near the rails, we boarded the train, and when it reached that spot, the caps played a special beat loudly. The recordings were later used as a soundtrack on a song he had written. Charlie was a genius.

Another day we learned that the famous Norfolk and Western 611 had been restored and was coming through our area, so we greeted it among hundreds of other railfans, and then rode it, windows down and with soot in our eyes.

A Name with Meaning

When I founded my company, I needed a name. I loved trains, loved design, and at the time was an art deco collector. The Streamliner, a sleek, shiny silver art deco train, had been designed by the great designer Raymond Loewy. So I named the company Streamline, because it represented what I wanted the company to be … streamlined and efficient, yet focused on beautiful design. Ever since then I’ve tried to live by those standards, to do things efficiently and to find ways to stand out with beautiful design in my magazines and products.

Losing Someone Important

Charlie was my best friend. We hung out for countless hours, never running out of things to talk about. We both loved radio (he actually got me my first radio job and trained me). We loved music and audio and well-done advertising. Of course, we loved trains. Though I was never the rabid nerd he was, I liked them because I liked being with him.

Sadly, Charlie died young, and I’ve had to spend the last couple of decades without him. To this day, I find myself thinking of Charlie when I see something he would have loved.

Obscure Obsessions

When I think about my friendship, which began when we were about 15 or 16, I realize that what I loved about him was that he was not obsessed with the things others obsessed about. He did not care about money, ever. He was an incredible writer and musician, writing hundreds of songs, yet he never cared about being famous. He would entertain with friends at various local venues, but he never took a shot at recognition outside of our small town. My buddy John and I were talking about him recently and realized he would have been internationally famous if he had just taken his shot. But that was not important to him, which is why we all loved him. He was driven by his art and never allowed other standards to influence who he became.

Living His Own Terms

This week, I lost another good friend, Ralph, who was my dad’s age. Ralph was very similar to Charlie, walking to his own beat, loving his art. The big difference is that Ralph took his shot and became a wealthy man. And though he ended up with the big mansions, he was never one to lord it over people about his wealth. To him, it was simply a tool to do more. Still, he did what he wanted, on his own terms, and was not trying to be what others wanted him to be.

I look at these two mentors and realize they helped shape who I am. Though they both put their families first, they both pursued what they loved with passion. They never cared what others thought. They did not follow the path we all think we’re supposed to follow.

It’s so easy to lose sight of who we really are because the world is always telling us what we should be. We’re all too often seduced by shiny objects.

What if you and I were truly ourselves at all times?

How would we change the way we live?

In the early days, I spent a lot of time trying to turn my friend Charlie into what I wanted for him. I could see his talent, so I wanted him to take a shot, because that’s what I would have done. Yet he was strong, he resisted, because it was not what was important to him.

The Richest Man I Knew

As our friendship grew, I realized that in his life of poverty, he was one of the richest people I knew. And it took me a lot of years to understand that wealth isn’t about objects, it’s about the jewels we acquire from our families, our deep friendships, and doing what we love.

What are the jewels in your life?

Who are the jewels that you would miss if they were lost?

What do you want to be doing that you’re passionate about, but are not doing?

What are the things you are doing that you don’t want to be doing?

Finding Your Jewels

I have a lot of regrets because when living in different cities, I did not spend enough time with my jewel of a friend. I got busy with my career and failed to get on the phone with him enough or visit enough. Then, suddenly, he was gone. Thankfully, I visited him before he died, took him to chemo treatments, but what I found amazing is that each day, he was having fun, laughing, and doing the things he loved. He did not change a thing, because he was already living well, and continued doing so.

Too many others have a wakeup call and suddenly, when they learn their time is up, start trying to catch up and do what they love.Do it now.

Don’t wait another moment.

Don’t burn time on meaningless things.

This week alone I lost two good friends, each I’d not spoken to or visited, yet wish I had. And in today’s uncertain world, you, me, or the jewels in our lives could be gone instantly.

This fall, at my Fall Color Week artist retreat, I realized how important each of these people had become to me, and I made a point to spend more time enjoying their company, knowing that the uncertainty of the world might mean it would be our last time together. The result was that my experience was richer and deeper.

Who do you need to see or talk to more?

What do you need to do that will bring you more joy than anything else?

What’s getting in your way?

Obsess about things that matter.

Eric Rhoads

P.S. I fell back. Did you? Don’t forget to change your clocks.

On Wednesday, I hold the 1 Day Atelier, my Beginner’s Day for Realism Live, my virtual art conference. Hundreds are attending. It is a great way to learn how to draw or paint, and learn lots of different subjects. If you’ve always felt you had some hidden talent and don’t know how to tap it, or if you feel you have no talent but wish you had some, come with me and I’ll make sure you learn the important first steps to becoming an artist. I even guarantee it. And then, if you want, attend the other three days. You’ll find it all here.

Here is what’s going on at Streamline this week.

• This Monday, November 8, is the last day to get the pre-release price on the new Camille Przewodek video, A Colorist’s Guide to Painting. As you know, I studied with Camille, and she changed my life when it came to understanding color.
• Wednesday, November 10 is the last day to vote for your favorite painting for the PleinAir Salon’s October People’s Choice Award. You can vote for your favorites HERE.
• Speaking of Realism Live, there’s $444 in bonus gifts if you get signed up by TONIGHT. Oh, and I do an “If You Don’t Love the First Day, You Don’t Pay” Guarantee. The lineup is amazing, including Quang Ho, Jacob Collins, Mary Whyte, Graydon Parrish, and dozens of others. The event starts on Wednesday with Beginner’s Day and then the main event on Thursday.
• The deadline to sign up for our next virtual online conference, Watercolor Live, and save up to $600 off your ticket is November 15.
• I’m always signing artists who are hot. In fact, we don’t sign anyone unless they are the best of the best, or if they are a hot up-and-comer. We’ll be releasing a new video from Kyle Buckland soon, so keep an eye on your e-mail for that announcement.
• We’re all ready to be out and about freely, with our family of artists. If that’s you, I should mention that the Plein Air Convention will sell out fast (it’s already 50% sold) for next May in Santa Fe. And because of my daily broadcast, we will see more new people. But we have to limit it to 1,200 people, so I recommend not waiting. You can cancel any time without penalty, but if you don’t have a seat, you’ll miss out on our 10-year anniversary of the event, and by now, you know we do special things on special events.
• Be sure to watch my Art School Live show this week at noon Eastern by following Eric Rhoads, Publisher on Facebook. Guests include _____ (if we don’t have any, eliminate the guests part) .
• Please follow me on Instagram @ericrhoads

Cool breezes and the sounds of distant birds flow through my open windows as I awaken, looking out the window at the orange sun splashing the twisted oaks. Late October here is what I always refer to as “California Weather,” meaning darned near perfect. Early Sunday mornings are a gift, as few are on the roads and the quiet is refreshing. All I hear is the sputter of a small airplane overhead.

I love airplanes. I suppose it goes back to when I was a small child. My mom would take us to Baer Field to watch airplanes land or take off, usually when my dad was traveling. We always went to the airport to see him off.

Dad became a pilot at 14 and would take us kids to airports to hang out with his pilot friends, so I have a special feeling when I go to small airports.

Up in the Sky All Alone

Following in my dad’s footsteps, I learned to fly and did my first solos at age 19, but I had a mild mishap on landing one time. I was coming in for a landing when the wind shifted direction by 180 degrees and started forcing me down. My instinct was to push on the gas to get back up in the air, but on that airplane, pushing in meant reducing the gas, so I killed the engine 40 feet in the air and experienced a hard landing and cracked the leg of the airplane. I don’t think I’ve ever been so scared.

My Crash

As soon as I landed, the instructor ran out to the aircraft, got me out, put me in another airplane, and sent me back up. I guess that’s what they call “getting back on the horse” when you get bucked off. I can remember being 5,000 feet above the ground, by myself, thinking, “What am I doing here? I have no business being up here.” So the next landing was my last as a pilot.

Rainy Day Painting

A couple of weeks ago, during Fall Color Week, me and a couple of friends were looking for a place to paint, but it was raining pretty hard that afternoon. I spotted the Lake Placid Airport, so we arranged to paint under the overhang of the hangar, looking out at a stunningly beautiful scene.

Flying the Fall Color

While we were there, a plane took people up for a scenic flight of the fall color, and next thing you know, one of my fellow painters had booked us on a flight for the following day. I got to sit in the front, and we flew the mountain ranges, flew over our lake house, and even saw a moose from the air. It was a special day, and it made me regret that I never really got back on the horse to get my license and fly. I then reminded myself that it’s never too late.

The reason that instructor wanted me back in the airplane was to prevent me from getting scared and giving up. The mistake I made was not returning again and again, and the mistake he made was not talking me down from my fear and helping me gain the confidence I needed. I had allowed fear to get in the way of my success.

Though I’m not one to look back, I can’t help but think about how much fun I missed out on because I gave in to my fear.

What horse did you not get back on?

Fear of failure is a powerful emotion, and one that prevents us from living as fully and beautifully as we could. 

Do we want to be on our deathbed, looking over our life and saying, “If only I had tried a little harder. If only I had tried at all”?

My son told me the other day that he wants to be rich and famous, wants to be an actor. I said, “Terrific, what are you doing about it?” His answer was, “Dad, it’s hard.” My answer was that “everything’s hard, but people overcome hard things every day.”

If we focus on why something is important to us, the why often overcomes the how. In reality, everything worth doing is hard. Pursuing dreams is hard. 

Since when is something being hard a reason not to pursue it?

Showing up here every Sunday is hard. Doing my daily Art School Life Facebook show is hard. Running my business and dealing with my team members is hard. Being a dad of triplets is hard. But the rewards overcome the difficulty.

Ask yourself about your own unrealized dreams.

Why were they unrealized?

Maybe you told yourself they were too hard. Maybe you tried once or twice and failed and stopped trying. Maybe your interests and passions changed, or maybe you told yourself they changed. That’s what I did with flying. I told myself, “It’s not all that important to me,” and I told myself I was really doing it for my father, not myself. But if I’m honest with myself, that’s not true.

What dreams would you still like to make happen?

What’s in your way?

What are you telling yourself are the reasons you can’t do it?
Are they real?

I started to tell myself that I’m probably too old to get my pilot’s license. But I doubt that’s true.

And I’ve come up with a dozen other excuses. But if it’s really important enough to me, I need to do it.

What about you?
What do you need to do?

Most limitations and excuses are not real. They are simply sharks swimming around inside your head. 

Don’t let the negative thoughts and excuses win.

Don’t spend the rest of your life in regret.

Don’t allow fear to own you.

Instead, realize that if you’re breathing, there is a way. And though you may have to alter the dream to fit your current circumstances, dreams are meant to be lived.

Get back on that horse.

Go, now, and live your dream.

Eric Rhoads

PS: Happy Halloween! I’ll be out tonight, costume on, begging for candy. Maybe someone will mistake me for a large overgrown kid pretending to be an ancient being from another time 🙂

I thought it would be nice to bring you up to date on my world and all the things we’re working on. 

• I’m doing a PAPIPA … Paint a Pumpkin in Plein Air challenge online. Paint a pumpkin from life  … any style, carved or not, and post it on your social media with the hashtag #PAPIPA and tag @EricRhoads. The winner will get a full ticket to our REALISM LIVE online virtual conference, which is coming up a week from Wednesday. The second and third runners-up will get their choice of any video we’ve produced at Streamline.Art.
• Last week we released a new video by Mary Garrish, called The 6 Elements of Design. She is very impressive and a great landscape teacher. She’s simplified things to six elements, and it really makes painting easier to understand.
• TODAY (October 31) is the last day to enter your paintings into the monthly PleinAir Salon. You can win $15,000 and the cover of PleinAir Magazine, and there are $33,000 in annual prizes. Our esteemed Judge is Patricia Terwilliger, co-owner of Jones & Terwilliger Gallery.
• This Tuesday, November 1, Is the last day to get the pre-release price on the new Camille Przewodek video, A Colorist’s Guide to Painting. As you know, I studied with Camille, and she changed my life when it came to understanding color.
• Speaking of Realism Live, there’s $750 in bonus gifts if you get signed up by November 7. Oh, and I do an “If You Don’t Love the First Day, You Don’t Pay Guarantee.” The lineup is amazing, including Quang Ho, Jacob Collins, and dozens of others.
• I’m always signing artists who are hot. In fact, we don’t sign anyone unless they are the best of the best, or if they are a hot up-and-comer. This upcoming weekend we’ll be releasing a new video from Kyle Buckland. Keep an eye out for that.

Have a great Halloween.

As I sit on the red cushions of the old wicker couch on this long Texas porch, the heat of the cushions feels great on my travel-weary back. My sleepy eyes are squinting at the intensity of the morning light, which is casting a yellow glow on the side of my art studio in the back of the property. The dogs keep jumping up on my lap, then leaping off to chase squirrels. I’m happy to be home after four months away in the Adirondacks.

Life of Regret

Recently I had a discussion with a friend who has lived a life of regret. In fact, he was sad and pathetic because every time we meet, he tells me about all the things he could have done but was too afraid to do. He was tremendously talented, but his fear of failure destroyed his life. Instead of using his amazing talents in Hollywood, he locked himself in his house for 30 years after he did not get a job he felt he deserved.

Stuck in the Mud

We all have experiences we regret, and many of us struggle with clinical depression, but every time I talked with my friend over many years, he brought up the job he almost got, and then told me all the reasons he did not really deserve to get it. He was stuck in his own mud.

What if he had tried one more time, or two more, or 20 more? What’s the worst that could have happened? Instead, he stopped trying.

How Do You Define Success?

We all define success differently. Some want jets and mansions, others want a great family, others want adventure. Yet to gain the success we want, we have to overcome fear.

I was afraid to ask out the most smart and beautiful woman I ever saw. But I eventually overcame my fear and ended up married to an amazing woman who gave us three wonderful kids. What if I had never overcome my fear?

Success is defined by your willingness to step out in spite of your fear in order to accomplish your dreams.

I’ve met some of the wealthiest and most successful people in the world, including presidents, vice presidents, billionaires, astronauts, sports heroes, and people who run giant industries, celebrities in film, TV, radio, and music.

Funny thing .. they are just regular people in every way. Some I’ve met did not even seem all that smart. But the one thing they all have in common is that they don’t let the fear control or stop them. They persist in spite of their fear, in spite of their failure.

What if I fail?

So what?

What if I look bad?

So what?

What if I lose everything?

So what?

Success in life, in work, in career, hobbies, and family is always about overcoming fear. We fear working harder, we fear failure, we fear ridicule, and we fear rejection.

What do you fear?

What could you do if you had no fear?

In what ways is fear controlling or preventing you?

Though there are many habits and abilities that impact success, fear is the one that holds us back most.

Have the courage to look fear in the face and say, “YOU DON’T CONTROL ME.”

You can do this. I know you can.

No matter your stage in life, old or youthful, you don’t want to look back at what you did not try because of your fear.

People who change the world have fear. But they step out anyway.

When will you overcome your fear? When you do, you’ll have newfound freedom, and greatness will emerge.

Eric Rhoads

PS: Happy Halloween! I’ll be out tonight, costume on, begging for candy. Maybe someone will mistake me for a large overgrown kid pretending to be an ancient being from another time 🙂

I thought it would be nice to bring you up to date on my world and all the things we’re working on. 

• I’m doing a PAPIPA … Paint a Pumpkin in Plein Air challenge online. Paint a pumpkin from life  … any style, carved or not, and post it on your social media with the hashtag #PAPIPA and tag @EricRhoads. The winner will get a full ticket to our REALISM LIVE online virtual conference, which is coming up a week from Wednesday. The second and third runners-up will get their choice of any video we’ve produced at Streamline.Art.
• Last week we released a new video by Mary Garrish, called The 6 Elements of Design. She is very impressive and a great landscape teacher. She’s simplified things to six elements, and it really makes painting easier to understand.
• TODAY (October 31) is the last day to enter your paintings into the monthly PleinAir Salon. You can win $15,000 and the cover of PleinAir Magazine, and there are $33,000 in annual prizes. Our esteemed Judge is Patricia Terwilliger, co-owner of Jones & Terwilliger Gallery.
• This Tuesday, November 1, Is the last day to get the pre-release price on the new Camille Przewodek video, A Colorist’s Guide to Painting. As you know, I studied with Camille, and she changed my life when it came to understanding color.
• Speaking of Realism Live, there’s $750 in bonus gifts if you get signed up by November 7. Oh, and I do an “If You Don’t Love the First Day, You Don’t Pay Guarantee.” The lineup is amazing, including Quang Ho, Jacob Collins, and dozens of others.
• I’m always signing artists who are hot. In fact, we don’t sign anyone unless they are the best of the best, or if they are a hot up-and-comer. This upcoming weekend we’ll be releasing a new video from Kyle Buckland. Keep an eye out for that.

Have a great Halloween.

Little Things

If I listen closely, I can hear an orchestra of a million small raindrops falling on the leaves of the deep green forest behind me. A small drizzle makes a huge impact when multiplied.

These forests are rejuvenated with tens of thousands of massive trees, reaching into the sky, too high for me to reach and certainly to climb, yet our ancestors here had cleared these forests just a hundred years before.

Small seeds falling in big winds replanted over a million bare acres of beauty, now preserved forever wild in this Adirondack park.

Little Can Be Big

Whether seedlings, small winds, or tiny droplets, small things can make a big difference. A giant ship in a hurricane-force wind among huge waves can change course to a new direction with a captain’s slight touch on a small wheel controlling the rudder. A small board can lift a large load with a fulcrum in the right place. A large load is lifted by a small pulley system. Huge forest fires are started by small sparks.

Where in your life have small things made a big impact?

For me, small words motivated massive action, resulting in a lifetime career.

When I asked my 14-year-old self what I wanted to do with my life, my answer was radio. But my aunt told me radio people are bad: “You don’t want to be a part of that industry. Radio people are evil.” But I wanted to be on the radio, and, knowing I’m not bad and I’m not going to be evil, her words made me mad and determined to prove her wrong. The result was a long, fruitful (and still ongoing) career in and around radio. And when I saw bad practices in radio, I set out to change them. For instance, women were treated horribly, sexually harassed by clients and management, so I used my magazine to raise awareness, do articles, create awards and lists, and over 30-plus years have had

Positive or Negative?

Words are small, seemingly innocent things, yet one frequently repeated statement from my dad — “You can do anything you set your mind to” — built my internal confidence. Though no one else, it seemed, believed in me, my parents’ constant encouragement launched me.

What small words of yours are having a big impact?

You and I have choices. Our words can be encouraging or discouraging.

I had no idea.

A few years ago I received a call from a man I barely remembered. He said, “One night over dinner you told me, ‘You are really smart, and you’ll own your own radio stations one day.’ I did not believe it at the time, but those words echoed in my head. No one else ever believed in me. You did, and that small spark encouraged me. I ended up owning one, then two, and now several radio stations.”

“The tongue can no man tame; it is a restless evil, filled with deadly poison.”

— James 3:8

“So the tongue is also little, it can boast great things.”

— James 3:5

What if we all watched our tongue? What if we held back the temptation to lash out and spew negativity, and instead projected encouragement and belief in others?

We would change the world.

Your small, seemingly innocent words can have an impact. Words can ring in our thoughts for decades. They can set us on fire or burn us at the stake.

How will you use your words today?

Eric Rhoads

PS:

This week I’m hosting just under 90 people at my Fall Color Week artist retreat. We’re having a blast and wish you were here. (Next retreat is my Publisher’s Invitational in June.)

I’m really excited about our next virtual art conference, Realism Live, which I’m hosting in November with the world’s finest artists as instructors, teaching figures, portraits, still life, landscape painting, and more. There’s even a Beginner’s Day. Check it out before registration bonuses disappear.

I feel like I’m inside a cloud. It’s dark, gray, chilly, and I can see very little definition in the clouds in the sky. Drizzle taps lightly on the roof in a slow, repetitive pattern, and the lake is calm other than an occasional ripple from the loons, who are packing their bags in preparation for their southern journey.

Hot lemon and sage tea fills my old metal camping cup as I snuggle with the dogs and an old green-and-red-striped Pendleton blanket. I hope sunshine and warmth return for just a few more weeks before my artists’ retreat here in the Adirondacks and our return to Texas.

Flashbacks have frequented my frontal cortex because of the huge number of old photos I found when emptying my dad’s place, which is now officially someone else’s summer home. I had forgotten how much I forgot, including a picture of me at the FBI.

A Visit to the FBI

As a kid about 12 or 13, I wanted nothing more than to become an FBI agent, which was glorified by the TV show called The FBI with Efrem Zimbalist Jr. My friend Randy and I started our own FBI club (there were just the two of us as members). We were even on local TV talking about our crime-solving club. Because I worked at my dad’s printing press in the summer, I printed my own stationery with the words “FBI, Jr.” at the top. And on that stationery, I’d write letters to J. Edgar Hoover, the true hero at the FBI (at the time no one was aware of his alleged “other life”). I always received signed replies (including a request to stop using the stationery), and I still have them somewhere.

One summer my dad announced we were taking a vacation to Washington, D.C. So I fired off another letter, got an invite, and showed up on the day and time suggested at the invitation of Mr. Hoover. But when we got there, the agent who greeted us said, “Mr. Hoover isn’t here today; he was called away on an important case.” But he added, “I’ve been told to give you a VIP tour.” So we toured everywhere behind the scenes. They even took us down to the FBI gun range, fired some machine guns, and gave my brothers and me the targets. (I’ll post a photo on my Instagram @Ericrhoads of me at the FBI.)

Though my dream of joining the FBI was broken when I was told I had to be a lawyer or an accountant to become an agent, I never gave up my passion for doing the right thing. I’ve always been the guy who likes to follow the letter of the law, even when no one would ever know.

In hindsight, I’m far too creative to have spent my time looking at someone’s books for fraud, but I love the idea of law-following (though not rule-following, which is another story for another day).

Most of us are law followers. But I often ask myself, what if I were guaranteed no one would ever know, no one would ever find out — would I break the law then?

My answer to that question is very clear to me. But then I ask, what if there were no accountability, no God? How would I behave if I knew there would be no repercussions? What about you?

Is law-breaking ever justified?

I can honestly say I’ve never hated anyone in my life — except that one kid who sat behind me in 7th grade math. I was his punching bag; he never stopped bullying and abusing me. And at that age I could not process it logically, only emotionally. And though I never would have gone so far as to get violent, I sure would not have minded if he was suddenly abducted by aliens.

What about you? Did you ever hate someone so much that you start thinking the end justifies the means?

Have you ever searched your soul? I’ve put together a few scenarios to consider.

Take the test now.

1. Let’s say a doctor gives you the wrong medication, and it causes you a lifetime illness. You’re convinced he did it knowingly, so you have him arrested. You are certain he wronged you, and he ends up going to prison. But later, you find out it was not him, but someone else who was responsible for the error. Would you let that doctor sit in prison and rot? Or would you come to his rescue even though you’ve been injured for life?
2. Or let’s say there’s a candidate for mayor you strongly oppose. You don’t like her personality or her politics. So you vote against her, and, happily, she loses the election. But you later discover the election was rigged in favor of her opponent. You are the only person who knows, and you have conclusive evidence. Your choice is to reveal the truth, or keep quiet because you can’t stand the idea of her becoming mayor. Would you hide what you know, even though she legally won? Or would you want the law followed to maintain the integrity of elections?
3. What if there was a Sunday School teacher you loved? You get to know him, have him over to your house dozens of times, and think he’s the world’s greatest and most high-integrity guy. But then you find powerful evidence that there is something truly evil about him, something unforgivable. Would you reveal what you know? Or would you tell yourself it can’t be real and continue to believe in him despite everything?
4. You have a favorite cousin, one who can do no wrong, one you adore. Suddenly you find out he’s been molesting the neighbors’ kids for years. No one knows but you. Would you turn in the cousin you love?
5. You run a business and find out your product is harming people — maybe even killing them. But you’re making a huge amount of money selling that product. Again, no one will ever know what you’ve learned. Would you sweep it under the rug? Or would you confess, knowing you could be sued and probably put out of business?

Life is filled with ethical dilemmas. And what we say we will do and what we really do when we’re faced with them are often two different things.

Anticipate Your Decisions

A wise friend once told me that you need to answer the tough questions before you face them.  There is no clarity when we’re faced with emotional dilemmas and our judgment is clouded by hatred, love, the prospect of financial gain or loss, or potentially hurting someone we love or ourselves.

Once you’ve crossed the line between good and evil, it will affect you forever. Even if you ultimately change, you’ve got to live with your decisions for the rest of your life.

Sometimes if feels like anything goes, that evil is excusable because everyone else is doing it. But do you want to be that person?

“For what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul?” — Mark 8:36

Getting even.

There is a lot of anger in our world today, driven by the state of the world, by politics, and by health concerns. A natural instinct is to want to get even, to make “them” pay and to right all the wrongs. Knowing where you stand on the issues will offer you clarity when you’re faced with needing to make up your mind about difficult challenges.

Remember, the high road is always the right road.

Eric Rhoads

PS:

Laurie and I (mostly Laurie) have spent 120 days working daily on getting my dad’s property ready to sell, which resulted in 12 tons from 42 dump runs. Now the house is empty, sold, and happily, we can move on.

As you may know, I was supposed to be in Russia at this time, but it, and our fall fine art trip was cancelled. Since we’ve not had a summer vacation, and since I would have been gone anyway, I’m taking some time off to enjoy what’s left. I’ll be back on my daily show after Fall Color Week and the drive home.

Fall Color Week is happening, and there are close to 100 of us gathering to paint outdoors daily. There is still room for you. It’s really a lot of fun.

My next virtual online art convention promises to be amazing, with a world-class lineup of the finest artists on earth. It’s in November, when most of us will be indoors anyway. If you want to learn to paint, or take your art to a higher level, this is your chance. Check it out.